Nosey?!

Just lately, DIL has made a couple of laughs comments about me being nosey, and I have said , laughingly ' yes I am!' However,I note she is very cagey about what she and my son are ' up to' now, and I don't feel, although I have joked about it, I am really. For instance, she has a couple of days a week off from her job,so I often ask if she has anything ( nice) planned? Just lately she either doesn't say or ignores the question. I think she goes out with her mum or friends, maybe she is fearful I will want to take up her time, but it's not that, I am just asking!
So where is the line between being 'nosey' or just interested in their lives? My son, being a man, doesn't chat to me that often, just a quick text once a week if I am lucky, and a two minute chat when I see him after dropping off or collecting DGC. I usually ask what they are up to that weekend, or have they seen so and so lately or did they know about this relative or that. I am becoming a bit sensitive about this issue. My DIL and I do have a good relationship on the whole,although like many of us on Gransnet , I often have to step on eggshells. I also miss the company of a relative I was close to, who passed away a couple of years ago, and we always talked about what we were up to, where we were going, who was doing what. I wasn't told I was being nosey then...I am confused...!