What sort of grandparent are you? Old Skool or New Wave?

1. The baby is tired and it’s nap time. Do you?

Pop her in the pram out in the garden. Fresh air will do them good and that way you can get on with the ironing. Head to the cinema - there’s a Mother and Baby viewing of the new Jean Claude Van Damme you fancy. Put her in a bedroom to sleep while you FaceTime that hilarious new friend you made at the last meet-up. Call a friend and take a walk to the local park, baby can wake up and you can all feed the ducks and catch up on some gossip.

2. You’ve been left with the baby and she’s teething. What do you use?

CBeebies. Distraction is the best method of pain relief. Pop a dummy in her mouth. The answer to everything. Calpol. The answer to EVERYTHING. Something to chew on - there’s probably some old ciabatta around that will do the trick.

3. It’s the first time you’ve looked after a newborn baby in years. How do you remember all those feeds?

An app detailing precise times for the feeds and a countdown facility, of course. Just follow the baby’s cries, he’ll let you know when he’s hungry. Good ol’ pen and paper. Feeds? Like that’s your job!

4. What’s the best pram in your opinion?

A standard stroller. An Andy Warhol special edition Bugaboo. An all-terrain - that marathon isn’t going to run itself! That Silver Cross you’ve kept all these years in the garage. All it needs is a little wipe down.

5. Your grandchild’s big first birthday is coming up. What’s your gift?

A nice, classic wooden train set. A knitted soft toy based on your own children’s favourite teddy, which you’ve spent the last year knitting. An iPad. The answer to EVERYTHING. A night out for the parents while you babysit. Goodness only knows when they last had sex!

6. Your daughter/daughter-in-law has left instructions for you to take your grandchild to various baby classes do you?

Pick out the best one or two activities and go with an open mind (and bulging purse). Follow them to the letter - this isn’t your baby, it’s theirs and they have a right to decide what you do with it. Share the instructions on Facebook and have a good old chuckle with your pals. Take junior off for a day of retail therapy - you get the larger changing rooms when you have a kid in tow, and there’s a lovely dress with sleeves just come in at Zara.

7. You’re asked to babysit your three grandchildren overnight on New Year's Eve. Do you...

Try not to be offended but slowly explain you have plans to dance the night away that don’t include tiny, yet adorable grandchildren and bedtime stories. Agree readily - you can’t think of anyone else you’d rather spend the night with. Agree then invite a group of close friends round for a takeaway and a few glasses of something fizzy. You come out smelling of roses, and have a great time to boot. Get cross about being asked - you’ve done your child rearing, and anyway, the other grandparents never get asked, it’s their turn to have the kids!

8. You hear that your grandchildren’s other grandparents have opened up a savings account for them. Do you...

Send a letter thanking them - they’re so thoughtful, and after all it’s all about the kids. Open another one with a far better interest rate (you’ve checked) and a free Kindle for you thrown in. Silently seethe and then start planning a trip to Disneyland for you all, which should put you back on top - going on Space Mountain is a small price to pay for being their favourite again. Instantly move on - it’s their money and if that’s what they want to do, each to her own. In any case, you’re spending your hard-earned cash on a trip to Machu Picchu this year so it’s ALL good.

9. Two invitations for Christmas. One from your daughter and the other from your son (which means spending day with difficult daughter-in-law...) Do you:

Arrange to spend equal time with both - it’s only fair and it’s only a 75 mile round trip to get to both in one day. Opt to spend the time with your daughter who not only is nicer, but also buys better wine. Accept the invite from your son but only on the proviso that your daughter and her family (and wine) are also invited. Stuff the lot of them and book a cruise with your husband. That inheritance isn’t going to spend itself!

What sort of grandparent are you? Old Skool or New Wave?

Super Granny

You’re SO hands on, fair & wise you’re making the rest of us look bad. The internet is your best friend & you use it to research new methods as well as retaining the best of the traditional child rearing ways. You could rewrite the New Granny's Survival Guide for us!

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What sort of grandparent are you? Old Skool or New Wave?

Utterly Old-Skool

You’ve raised your kids successfully so you're keen to stick with what works, whether it’s a Silver Cross heirloom or a dab of whisky on the gums. Which makes you part Super-Granny part Doctor Spock. The childcare one. Not the Vulcan.

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What sort of grandparent are you? Old Skool or New Wave?

The New Old Mash-Up

You’ve really got a handle on this grandparenting lark, mixing up the best of the old with the finest of the new. Whether it’s embracing Baby Yoga with an e-cigarette in your handbag, or feeding the ducks with artisan sourdough, you got it baby!

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What sort of grandparent are you? Old Skool or New Wave?

New Wave Grandma

In your day it was the adults that mattered. Now everything seems to revolve around little junior Mr/Miss and it’s driving you to drink (Pinot Grigio. Chilled. Since you ask.) You want to help raise independent little thinkers. Just like their Gran. And you’re doing a great job!