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Mates rates??

(13 Posts)
poppyburrows Wed 17-Aug-11 14:04:34

Hello fellow grannies...its nice to meet you!!
Ive just sold my house but wont have anywhere permanent to live for about 6 weeks. Although I will be visiting various other friends and relations during this period, my best friend suggested I use her house as a 'base', so I had somewhere to sleep and store a few clothes etc. I mentioned last night that we needed to talk about money; ie board & lodging, and she came up with £100 per week ( inc food) which I think ( and so do others) is a bit outrageous!!!! I didnt really respond at the time, partly because Id had a few sherberts, but the more I think about it - the more extortionate it seems!!! I dont want us to fall out before Ive even got in the door, but what do I say? Help please!!!!!!!

Nagyi Wed 17-Aug-11 14:34:48

I don't think you can start bartering if you want to keep her as a friend. It's a case of take it or leave it. If you think (as I do) that her suggested contribution is OTT, the kindest thing to do would be to find an excuse why you would prefer to stay elsewhere.

glassortwo Wed 17-Aug-11 15:23:47

Difficult position to be in, have you checked how much you could rent somewhere in the area and this will give you a yard stick to compare what she is offering. Friends dont always think you should get mates rates. I agree with Nagyi its a case of take it or leave it.

raggygranny Wed 17-Aug-11 15:50:26

If you had to stay in a hotel or B&B for the duration it would cost a lot more than £100 p/w ...
Having said that, I don't think a friend should ask for more than what would cover her costs for housing you, i.e. the cost of any extra food, heating etc.

Acheron Wed 17-Aug-11 16:44:50

It sounds high to me. I don't think I would have asked a friend for more than a contribution towards food if it was for a limited time. If it was on a permanent basis it would be different. I agree with Nagyi that unless you have no other option I'd look around for somewhere else. From what you say you won't be there every single day anyway.

harrigran Wed 17-Aug-11 17:14:27

Oh dear, I thought that sounded quite reasonable especially when you see what food costs these days. Even one extra person using electric shower/ washing machine/ dryer etc can bump up the bills.

GoldenGran Wed 17-Aug-11 17:39:34

I think for a friend it should be less, but I'm afraid I think I agree with others that say pay up or go elsewhere. Sorry! I wouldn't charge a friend that, but everyone's different.

shysal Wed 17-Aug-11 17:48:40

Is your friend short of money? If your stay will cause money problems then I am sure you will want to pay what it will cost her. If this is not the case I do think it is a bit steep. Perhaps you could pay for bed only and provide your own food, claiming that you would be saving her the worry of cooking for you.

granmouse Wed 17-Aug-11 18:42:42

Our friends are staying here for 3 weeks between houses.They are well off.They are close friends and not for the world would I take money from them.They buy groceries if we are shopping,have treated us to a meal and bought me a beautiful bowl from a craft fair.that is more than enough.You 'friend' is taking the if you ask me.

glammanana Wed 17-Aug-11 19:48:42

I think if you where asked to contribute to the food bill and any charge's for the phone if you used it would suffice,anything else I think is taking the
"Michael" and I would definatley look to rent somewhere short-term,before
DH and I left UK when we sold our house many yrs ago now we rented a
luxury caravan for 6 weeks whilst we got our finances sorted,as it was
short term and cash payment we got it at a very reasonable rate,so worth
while looking around maybe,but £100 per week is outragious I think

poppyburrows Thu 18-Aug-11 12:51:49

Wow! Thank you all very much!! A mixed bag of reactions. I do take all your points, but overall I feel that as Im only going to be there a few weeks and elsewhere for most of it at that,

I'll try and beat her down a bit!

Nagyi Thu 18-Aug-11 17:31:13


Are you sure haggling not going to damage your friendship?

grannyactivist Fri 19-Aug-11 14:59:46

I live in a large house and regularly have both house guests to stay (down and outs or friends & family), and a range of B&B guests, lodgers and homestay students who pay me for the privilege of living here.
If people are staying at my invitation, then they are guests and I expect no payment in cash or in kind. However, I do also receive requests for temporary accommodation from people who are in a 'fix' and need somewhere to stay for a while - and in such cases I usually charge the going rate, which is always cheaper than any alternative they could come up with. The additional costs of buying food, heating, washing, cleaning etc, plus the inconvenience of having people to stay when it suits them, rather than when it suits me, all adds up. I don't know whereabouts in the country you are, but where I live £100 would be considered a 'friend's' rate.