Gransnet forums



(94 Posts)
absentgrana Mon 12-Sep-11 12:55:16

I just noticed the announcement of an actor's death "after a long battle with cancer". I realise that cancer is a horrible disease and have seen many family members and dear friends die from it – as well as some who have survived it. I realise too that one's attitude towards an illness and its treatment can play a role in its eventual outcome. But why is it always a battle against cancer, implying, presumably, that those who have succumbed to this wretched scourge just didn't "fight" hard enough?

Granny23 Tue 13-Sep-11 13:58:35

Why does everyone have a 'massive' heart attack? Why not huge? or severe? or even fatal?

Why have I been quoted in the local paper - 3 times over the years - as saying I was 'over the moon' about something when the words have never, ever, formed in my brain, let alone crossed my lips?

Why was it (still is I think) a requirement of any news item or article iro Women's Refuges, to have a photograph of a woman in sillouette, washing dishes, while staring 'wistfully' out of the window.

ameliaanne Tue 13-Sep-11 14:18:28

I do so agree about a "battle with cancer". I think it is mainly down to the luck of the game and we can't actually battle with it. Another expression which really irritates me is "an amazing journey" and the fact that the word "amazing" is so overused these days and I have stopped using it altogether as it has almost been devalued. And in a number of 'celebrity' programmes on the television, everyone has "worked so hard".

crimson Tue 13-Sep-11 14:22:48

Re Women's it awful of me to think of a group of women [sans men] with fags hanging out of mouths and bottle of wine in hand [a la Patsy]? Yes; it is awful of me, but I'm still thinking it.....

ameliaanne Tue 13-Sep-11 14:23:30

And 'going forward' - hugely irritating....... 'In the future' will do quite nicely thank you. Goodness, I am getting old.

absentgrana Tue 13-Sep-11 14:28:30

Iconic – that's another one. Grrr.

flores Tue 13-Sep-11 14:47:22

They're not!! lol

flores Tue 13-Sep-11 14:48:37

" There's always next year"........on losing!

absentgrana Tue 13-Sep-11 14:52:33

Granny23 What about the clip that the BBC always shows when talking about Alzheimers, closing care homes, pension reforms, hospital treatment for the elderly or anything to do with grannies – someone (shown from the knees down) walking with a Zimmer frame and an age-spotted hand stirring a cup of tea?

greenmossgiel Tue 13-Sep-11 14:57:16

So patronising! Would it not be so much better if they showed people involved in activities and thoroughly enjoying themselves instead of making it look as if they're on the road out anyway, so why care? angry

Granny23 Tue 13-Sep-11 15:16:42

Yes, it is awful of you Crimson!! But does that not just illustrate the danger inherent in cliches of all types? When you begin to think that there is something wrong with you because you are not grief struck by the death of some celeb you have never met; when you are terrified of going into hospital because 'everyone comes out worse than they went in'; when women in danger of their lives will not seek refuge because we all know what these places are like and the 'type' of women who go there.

Just for the record, having spent the largest part of my working life visiting refuges most days (and more than a few middle-of-the-nights), they are actually warm, welcoming, supportive places, where women are helping women to recover from abuse and regain their self respect. Of course with, say 5 women and 10 children from all walks of life occupying one big house there is the occasional falling out but in general the atmosphere is positive, friendly, often hilarious, as being no longer in fear 24/7, children blossom and women rediscover their old selves.

I think most refuges now will have one smoking area set aside and drinking in the refuge is a big NoNo. You do encounter women who seem unable to help themselves, often those who have been co-erced into refuge by social workers. On the other hand any woman who can stand up to a violent bully, leave him, all her worldly goods and her home behind and seek to create a better life for herself and her children is one AMAZING (I do not apologise for the use of amazing in this context), brave and inspirational women. As a new WA worker I was told that the Workers draw their strength from the refuge residents rather than the other way round and I soon found this to be true, also, although the 'staff' can help with practicalities, the biggest benefit of being in a refuge is the learning, advice, encouragement and support shared amongst the families there.

supernana Tue 13-Sep-11 15:22:34

...and then there is the irritating interview at the site of some tragedy when a near neighbour says...the entire community is shocked...he looked like a perfectly regular guy. What does an irregular guy look like? And ruffians who cause utter mayhem, described by soppy parents as being "normal teenagers"...and why do people place toys, bunches of flowers, football scarves and notes at the site of an accident? Far better to give a thoughful donation to a worthy charity. And...don't get me started on the likes of 'celebs' who readily spill the beans on a "close relationship" to the likes of Hello and then wimper about the lack of privacy in their little lives after being ditched...BAH! Humbug! hmm

PoppaRob Tue 13-Sep-11 15:40:00

And ads for pensioner insurance, superannuation or "lifestyle villages" where the youngish looking 60somethings are riding bikes beside a lake or river and she inevitably has a scarf around her neck!

absentgrana Tue 13-Sep-11 15:57:15

You look so young/attractive/slim/whatever for your age. No, this is what my age looks like. I am not flattered by being mistaken for being younger than I am and, anyway, why are you assessing me by the number of years I have lived? Yah boo sucks.

greenmossgiel Tue 13-Sep-11 16:10:06

PoppaRob- she will have wind-blown hair and a fresh and delicate complexion. He will be a well-toned chap with silver hair, crinkles at the side of his eyes and gleaming teeth....I know no-one like that round here!!! There again, there is a 'lifestyle village' not far away, and it looks like something out of a 'fantasy film' - all smooth grass and small white Portacabin-like bungalows. Quite unnerving, actually! hmm

Annika Tue 13-Sep-11 16:23:28

Big chain resturants that show on their menu, fresh garden peas.. lets be honest here they were grown in a field and nine times out of ten they have been frozen and heres another home cooked food ?????????? again this would have been done, at best in the resturant kitchen or in a food factory confused

nannysgetpaid Tue 13-Sep-11 16:37:16

I hate the phrases 24/7 and "Bless".

Annika Tue 13-Sep-11 16:51:24

nannysgetpaid I agree with you I also hate 247/7

Joan Tue 13-Sep-11 22:28:19

Not too keen on 9/11/ It would be 11/9 in our language, anyway.

crimson Tue 13-Sep-11 22:31:12

Datewise it's been really confusing me at work over the past couple of days! Especially with it being 2011. Lost track of how many times I've written the wrong date on things and keep thinking it's nearly Christmas.....

glammanana Tue 13-Sep-11 23:28:15

Someone please explain "Play Date's" what's wrong with playing at your mate's house ?

Annobel Wed 14-Sep-11 08:59:49

Do 'play dates' have to be set up between mums and put on the family calendar?

JessM Wed 14-Sep-11 09:21:42

and then there are the 'SLEEPOVERS where they stay awake all night...

glammanana Wed 14-Sep-11 10:18:25

Annobel maybe you have to make a window in your calendar to fit in the playdate durrrrrr ?

greenmossgiel Wed 14-Sep-11 10:52:19

All 'Americanisms' brought about by the trashy telly programmes that the youngsters glue themselves to!! Utter rubbish! angry

Mamie Wed 14-Sep-11 11:37:57

I hate the sloppy use of decimated. Really? One in ten? Have you counted?