Mystery man - AIBU to want to know more about him?

I would also add a possibility - as all you have is a phone number, maybe he has done a maildrop to all the ladies in your street saying he has seen them in the garden and would like them to go out somewhere with him. He could be counting on a percentage return.

I knew a chap once who, when he went to a dance, asked each partner "did she? would she?" and reckoned to get a result from at least one during the evening. To him it was worth risking a very cold shoulder from the rest.

Be careful, gettingonabit you have never even met him.

shysal - yes - you're right. My relationship is pretty much over now though. I think I'm flattered and curious more than anything else and I don't want a relationship, just a bit of fun for a change!

It all sounds a bit odd, now I'm thinking about it again. Odd he didn't put his address on the letter, odd he's seen me but hasn't spoken. Perhaps he even followed me home! Definitely a no-no, methinks!

Thanks all, for your thoughts.

Would you be happy for your daughter to do this? No.
OK he may be shy, but surely somebody knows him or something about him.
I would agree with the others and take the advice given on dating websites - meet on neutral territory in a public place at the very least. They don't stop being nutters just because they are a bit more mature

I see on another thread that you are in an unhappy relationship. If your partner were to find out wouldn't life become rather complicated?Is it worth rocking the boat when you don't even know if you will like this man? Or maybe you hope it could lead to a way out for you.
You deserve happiness, so I wish you luck with this tricky dilemma, just don't take any risks.

I would then tend to think if he had seen you in the garden he would pass comment on say : "how nice your garden looks " "what nice weather we are having" that sort of thing to break the ice so to speak.green your comments are spot on if it was my DD it would be a definate no no.

You say you don't know where he lives, gettingonabit, which suggests he didn't put his address on the letter he sent you. VERY fishy! Take care.

Oh - gettingonabit don't go to meet him. If he's got any sense at all he wouldn't use this approach. You only just have to look at any newspaper to see the dangers that lurk everywhere. If this was your daughter, what would you say to her if she told you she was going to go out alone with someone she knew nothing whatsoever about?

I don't think he followed me, glammanana - he's seen me around a couple of times and in my front garden. I'd just love to know who he is, out of curiosity if nothing else!

I would be very careful with this gettingonabit he has obviously followed you home to find out your address or has someone told him your address ? you can never never be too careful,think twice and be safe.

Hmmmm ............. I'm with Bagitha and*GrannyA*. You can never be too careful in these situations. However, he is probably a very nice person!

green - no - he's a total stranger. He saw me in the neighbourhood, and sent me a letter.

I agree. Suggest a coffee to suss him out before signing up for a whole evening!

Definite no-no as far as I'm concerned. Call him, and as Baggy says, explain that you need to meet him (preferably in a local cafe/pub) before agreeing to accompany him anywhere.

Would you be going by yourself to meet the man? Do any of your friends know him, gettingonabit? How did you find out that he wanted to meet up with you? Excuse all of the questions, but I would take care not to make any decisions to meet up with him until you've found out a bit more about him.

Say to him that you'd like to accept but he's a stranger to you so you are wary and would like to know more about him. If he's a decent chap he'll understand completely. If he gives a shirty answer you'll know to keep away.