Thank you notes/messages

GrannyTunnocks! Where have you been? Not heard from you for a long while.

I only get a mumbled thank you on skype sometimes ...or i have to ask...i found this Christmas it was even more expensive than ever to post...so i will.. except for (very lightweight items) be sending them money through Tesco's or similar....then they can go and buy exactly what they want! but i would never have a dispute about anything...its a fine line you walk..even more so when they live across the world..

Ninathenana i would check my bank account if i was you..the cheque may not have reached them!

My grandsons sometimes forget to say thank you for things I have posted to them, though they are very good about it face to face. Actually I find the older one (10) is getting much better. He really seems to genuinely appreciate things now, so it comes from the heart.

Like Johanna says, they lead such busy lives! Sometimes I think a breathing space would be good for them.

I have the same issue with one of my DILs. She will send a thank you card to me supposedly from my Grand daughter, but never for gifts to her. She is very thoughtful when it comes to buying us gifts, but we never get a thank you for gifts we give her....something I can't understand, as it is so easy to say 'thank you'.

Just had one of my DiL' s 'thank you' cards, with a photo of the GSs, up to the ears in Christmas packages, and signed by them. I hope this will get them into the habit of writing letters when they are a little older.

Me too, I always wrote thank you letters or cards from when I was a child and when married we taught ours to always say thank you, one way or another.
Now they always follow the pattern and I am pleased to say our Grandchildren are being encouraged.
It's such an important thing, like manners.!(which are sadly lacking in today's age!)

As a particularly b-minded teenager, I used to write the most fulsome thank-you letters to relatives who had sent me the worst or most useless presents. What do you say about a handkerchief sachet? 'Just what I always wanted' - that's what!

But at least I did write!

From The Herald Newspaper:

A GROUP of Newton Mearns matrons was discussing the youth of today, and how grandchildren were tardy in thanking them for presents.

However one of them proudly declared: "I sent my grandson a cheque for his birthday and he came round the very next day to thank me."

As her friends looked on approvingly, she added: "Mind you, I had forgotten to sign it."

This thank you letter business is a bit of a pain as far as I am concerned. To me the really important thing is my relationship with my in-laws and out-laws.

My grand daughters are still too young to write but I really don't think I will expect them to...

Thank you letters are so often a chore and as a result... phony!

I'm inclined to agree with you, mousearing. So long as I know a gift has arrived safely at its destination, I am content. What follows may sound a bit nauseating sanctimonious , well, something-of-that-nature..... but the giving of the present is what it's about for me, not the thanks I get. It's lovely when you know someone really appreciates a gift, of course, but most of the satisfaction is from the choosing or making, and sending. At least, I find that.

But if the recipient doesn't thank you how do you know if they liked the gift? Surely that's what makes giving so pleasurable?

Love it Granny23!!!

Did I see jingl or am I having a funny five minutes?

Probably both jeni - the last posting from jingl on this thread was Jan 4th, before she was reincarnated.

Well, that's certainly a tricky one, chrissy, but I have certainly thanked people for presents I didn't like. I'd be thanking them for the kind thought or, perhaps once or twice in my life, simply because it was "the thing to do". At least if one gives a gift simply because one wants to, it doesn't really matter whether there is a thank you or not.

It's not simple though, is it? Social mores never are.

It's me having funny five . Of course it's feb now. I think I'll go to bed. Must be more tired than I realised.
Night all.

Yes I think you're probably right Baggy, I would still thank someone politely even if I hated the gift, as it is indeed "the thought that counts".

While knowing it's the thought that counts and a written thank you is very nice to receive, if you get no response at all how are you to know that your gift arrived?