Is taking my grand-daughter to the library a MUST when I babysit?

take the child to the library.
it will make your daughter happy.
you're only not going because you want to make your daughter irritated and show you have power.
sack that and go.
the library is ok. you might enjoy it. the child might enjoy it. the daughter will feel better. has she asked you to do that one thing that she can't do? why not do it?

I did have withdrawal symptons - kept thinking I'll ask on Gransnet and couldn't.
Did try the comps at the library - I know they are free but I was surrounded by other users all 'coffing,sniffing, scratching' etc. Also by the time you check and reply to your e-mails you haven't time to browse the forums on Gransnet. Thanks for your welcome messages.

Good to have you back, dorsetpennt. I hope you haven't been having withdrawal symptoms. I'm sure I would!

Nice to have you backdorsetpennt

Wellcome back!

Welcome back!

Sorry but if you were sitting your grandchild in front of the box for the duration I'd think your daughter would have an axe to grind. However, you are doing all sorts of craft activities and I'm sure you would have gone to the library in time - she has no right to complain. So many mums don't have parents close by enough to help out so she should be a little bit grateful.

Just to say I've been away from Gransnet for nearly 6 months due to being computerless - now I'm not and I'm back!!! It's great.

Depends on the library as well . I use the local one which has a Wed. morning sit in for tinies with stories nursery rhymes etc and it is rather sweet to see the young librarians falter over "obscure" nursery rhymes which we grans have to bellow out because they weren't as on the ball as we are. As for TV odd how "we haven't time for tV too full and busy lives" but blow me the ipad came out of the handbag because the five year old didn't know how to sit through chuch-isn't an ipad tv?

I went to see Prof Susan Greenfield talking the other day. About the future of the brain. An entertaining and accessible speaker. She said that all the media we use will inevitably shape brains of the future, in many as yet unpredictable ways. She was not pessimistic about this.
Bless the mums really. They are so earnest and task focussed.

My DD, who is trying so hard to be a perfect mum, doesn't want the babies' brains "stimulated" by the TV screen - they have to have tummy time, gym time, lots of textures to stroke, mashed swede before their breast milk....I applaud her (but am looking forward to seeing what happens when she has a couple more as well!!) In the meantime I know I shouldn't find it funny when their little heads swivel round trying to see the lights and colours flickering on that strange box behind them.

My 3 year old grandsons were watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory when I got to their house at bathtime the other day - they were so enthralled, they were allowed to watch it all, as long as they went straight to bed immediately after, at 7.45 pm. There was not a murmur - they tired themselves out having the bath and the DVD, and trotted off up the stairs like a dream. On other days, they will not look at the TV. I see no harm in allowing children to relax and enjoy TV programmes that are fun, age appropriate and sometimes educational, too, as long as the TV is not a baby sitter, and they don't lose out on other playtime.

You said it Learner! DD recently bought a Bagpuss DVD. "Is that for GS?" I enquired. "Oh no," she said, "its for me!" He is allowed half an hour of TV a day, so if he has had his half hour by the time we get hold of him, that's it! When he was younger, we could get away with all sorts, but NOW HE TELLS HER exactly what we have been doing during the day! But when he pleads, I am putty in his pudgy little hands! I have to say that our children these days are driven by different forces in bringing up their little ones, but really, as you say, it never did them any harm.

Had to laugh, Artygran. My DD is also very disapproving of the TV, to the extent that if her 6-month old twins are even in the same room as a turned-on telly the volume is turned down to almost mute and the babies are turned round so their backs are towards it! When I think of the all the pleasure she used to get from Postman Pat...........

I agree with the other GNers. You sound as if you are doing very well for your granddaughter and your daughter ought to thank you on her knees. We used to take our grandson to the junior library occasionally but he didn't like it much, especially if it was busy and there were lots of tinies around. He has always had plenty of exposure to books at home (and whenever I go to the library, I take out books to read to him when he comes here). Now he is at school and racing ahead with his reading, so not spending time at the library has not hindered him in the least. I have a similar problem to yours in that my daughter has a bee in her bonnet about TV. We use the TV as a respite when we have run ourselves ragged at the park, the woods, the swimming pool, cleaned up after baking, painting, gluing or picking up a thousand pieces of lego, but I feel irrationally guilty every time we put the TV on for him, in case he goes over his "quota", but it is nice just to have an excuse to put your sixty five year old feet up for half an hour!

newlife I agree with glass on this one children can have too much of a structured time when they are being cared for and they have to be left to play as well as doing organised activities,your DGD will have plenty of time for organised activities when she statrs school full time,if your DD is so concerned with her not going to the library let her take her on a Saturday morning or let her go with her daddy and they can then have some quality time together choosing some books.Welcome to GN

I agree it's probably much more to do with fond memories with her own Gran, than a need for you to go to the library with your GD.
My son has wonderful memories of caravan holidays with his grandparents, so much so, he talked us into taking his boys away in a caravan last year, we all had a great time, but it back fired on him! because this year when he told them they were going to disney land they said they would rather go away in a caravan again with nan and grandad instead!

She (mum) got told off in the pub, though!

Brilliant ariadne
Mine gave me far too many sweets and helped to wreck my teeth.
the other one used to smoke in the house. (shock horror timewarp moment!)

They are right,*Newlife101*! My DD remembers all sorts of things that she and my mum did - including mum buying her a Babycham when she was 12,

Hang on just one moment Newlife101! Didn't you say on another thread you were forced to retire, have arthritis and have had 3 new hips?!!! I think your daughter is lucky you are in any fit state to mind your grandaughter. I hope she recognises that

Gosh - what a lovely positive start to Gransnet! Thank you all for your thoughts, especially the ones that made me smile - it put some perspective on it!
Best wishes, Newlife101

I agree with Carol, Syberia et al
Maybe ask her to talk about her memories of going to the library and what made it so special.

Yes, I agree. Your daughter has special memories of the trips to the library with her gran, and would seem to want to create similar memories for her own child. It is a very special memory for her and I don't think it is a criticism of your own activities.

Or just go to the pub/bingo youself.
Seriously it does sound as if going to the library was something special she remembers -how about a compromise and go 1 in 4 visits? Talk to her about it, it may be that Saturdays are too busy or that it is to do with the GD/Granny relationship. Sounds like quite an unenergetic option to me and not unpleasant!
I do find that in my case DD has higher principles about what activities DGC should follow than I ever had when she was a tot - a bit of Bagpuss and a cup of coffee for me was about the sum of it.

I'd take her to the pub and the bingo that would shut your DIL up ungrateful person