Sorry everyone, but I am feeling sorry for myself and tearful today, it has all got a bit much!
As you all know, I am due to be a grandma very soon. Trouble is, I feel as though I have to walk on eggshells when speaking to DD. She has not felt well all through and I do understand that it has made her unhappy.
I see her about every six weeks, she lives in Yorkshire and we live in Northants. She has not been able to travel down because of nausea, and that is fine, we are happy to go there. We speak on the phone a couple of times a week.
It's just that NOTHING I say or do is right!
I have always been a mum that steps back rather than push myself forward and have never interfered with any of her life decisions, (even if I have privately rolled my eyes! )
We have always been close and I am glad for that.
She has been very grumpy, she admits that herself, but every time we speak I am left with the feeling that I am either stupid or an embarrassment and I feel I am being pushed away at a time when I want to be closer. (DH agrees, it is not imagined).
A while ago, when speaking about when baby will be born, I asked if it would be okay to go up and be around when little one is born. "Why on earth would you want to do that? The last thing I need is to be wondering what you are doing while I am giving birth!" What does she think I am going to be doing? Because my daughter is having a baby I want to be able to help if I am needed, if I am not needed fine, I will just come and see you all when she arrives "We are not going to see anyone for 2 weeks after she is born as we want to bond". Okay, I get the bonding but I would like to pop in and see you all. "God mother!"
Is it me? I have not gone "baby shopping" with her, I have not been involved with any of it really. I have been very careful about what I have bought as there are so many rules, and I have bitten my tongue on so many occasions.
She doesn't seem to realise that it is an important event in my life, too.
The thing is, I have now had enough. I sent a card to them both for Mother's Day from baby thinking it was a nice thing to do and that was wrong too.
I am just finding it all too stressful and a bit of me wants to say what I really think, but of course the last thing I want is to fall out.
Sorry, but I just needed a shoulder
syberia Mon 19-Mar-12 10:52:05
Greatnan Mon 19-Mar-12 10:58:28
susiecb Mon 19-Mar-12 11:00:08
MrsJamJam Mon 19-Mar-12 11:00:14
kittylester Mon 19-Mar-12 11:07:37
Carol Mon 19-Mar-12 11:10:16
wotsamashedupjingl Mon 19-Mar-12 11:19:34
gracesmum Mon 19-Mar-12 11:20:35
syberia Mon 19-Mar-12 11:22:37
Notsogrand Mon 19-Mar-12 11:34:10
bagitha Mon 19-Mar-12 11:35:04
artygran Mon 19-Mar-12 11:37:48
Butternut Mon 19-Mar-12 12:03:09
mrshat Mon 19-Mar-12 12:20:58
greenmossgiel Mon 19-Mar-12 12:42:30
Maniac Mon 19-Mar-12 13:12:37
Nanban Mon 19-Mar-12 13:43:12
nanachrissy Mon 19-Mar-12 14:23:15
Mishap Mon 19-Mar-12 14:34:19
expatmaggie Mon 19-Mar-12 14:44:19
Annika Mon 19-Mar-12 14:53:11
syberia Mon 19-Mar-12 15:16:46
Mishap Mon 19-Mar-12 16:59:57
JessM Mon 19-Mar-12 17:15:39
NannaJeannie Mon 19-Mar-12 19:53:32