Gransnet forums


Own room for grandaughter at our house.

(53 Posts)
justrolljanet Sun 29-Apr-12 10:48:46

We are fortunate to be able to look after our grandaughter for 1 day a week while her mum goes to work, am I being unreasonableto think that it is ok for her to have her own room here with toys, travel cot and some emergency spare clothes etc

shysal Sun 29-Apr-12 20:03:22

PatB My GCs come in sets of 3 and, like you, I have a tiny spare room. I have bunk beds and a 'ready bed' which is a blow-up base with attached pillow and sleeping bag.
The children are getting older now, but it always made sense to have bits and pieces here.

PoppaRob Mon 30-Apr-12 06:50:21

I look after my GD on weekdays while her parents work, so I've had the second bedroom set up as her room since she was almost 6 months old. What started as a room with a change table and a cot has become a room with a toddler bed, dressing table, bookshelf, easel, toyboxes, etc. now that she's 3 years old. She spends a fair bit of time in the loungeroom or my bedroom/study but she knows the toys go back into the toyboxes in her room when she's finished with them. She has posters of Marvin the Martian, Hello Kitty, DirtGirlWorld, Dora the Explorer, Emily the Strange and Fender guitars as well as her ukuleles (she calls them "cool guitars") on hooks on the walls... I'm pushing a kind of toddler rock chick line with her! smile

petallus Mon 30-Apr-12 08:05:49

This is such a heart-warming thread.

When my GS was 15 he came to live with us and we gave him the spare room which he gradually decorated to his taste. It's still in creams and browns and recently (7 years on) he painted the whole of one wall in metallic gold!!

Also have beds in another room for when the 6 and 13 year old GSs stay over, usually at the weekend.

I agree it is a very nice thing for GC to know they have a room in grandparents' house, especially if they are going through a bit of turmoil or (as in my GSs's case) moving house frequently.

grannyactivist Mon 30-Apr-12 09:11:16

justrolljanet I just don't understand what the problem might be with you having a room for your granddaughter. At my house my two year old grandson has his own room, cot, highchair, car seat, pushchair, toys, books, clothing - in short a full range of whatever is needed for him - and it makes life so much easier for his mum who can just drop him off in the clothes he's standing up in and know that his needs, whatever they are, are catered for. It gives her complete peace of mind. He stayed over this last weekend and when he was tired he told me so and then headed off to 'his' room to be put to bed with all the confidence that he would have had at home.

imjingl Mon 30-Apr-12 10:27:26

Maybe they think you are rushing it a bit? Sort of, hoping grandaughter will move in with you at some point!?! grin

I can understand a cupboard. Or part of a room for highchair, toys and travel cot. But the rest of the room still to be used for your own purposes.

That's what happens in our house.

grannyactivist Mon 30-Apr-12 10:36:10

jingl - I live in a big house with lots of rooms. grin

imjingl Mon 30-Apr-12 10:46:52

Yes. But it's the idea that is coming across to the parents in this instance. hmm

Anagram Mon 30-Apr-12 11:10:26

I think imjingl's right - one of the parents, while clearly happy for justrolljanet to look after her GD, sees the 'room' as a step too far. Try not to take it personally, don't refer to it as 'so and so's room', and eventually I'm sure everything will just naturally fall into place, especially when GD gets older.

ninathenana Mon 30-Apr-12 15:27:36

Sorry but I find it odd that parents would find anything to object about regarding this.

DGS lives 90min drive away and is now 3. We don't see him on a regular basis but when we do he usually stays a few days for what ever reason. Our spare room is just that a room for guests, it's not specifically DGS's room although we do have safety side for the bed. We also have highchair, buggy and car seat.We have toys and all the other stuff babies need, we will of course keep all this for Samuel.

DD and SIL are greatful that they don't have to transport all this every time they visit.

janthea Mon 30-Apr-12 16:30:22

I can't understand their problem. I find it very odd. My spare room has bunk beds and I have a cot in the second spare room. I also have sterilisers, baby seats, high chairs and a spare buggy. I have baby cups, mugs and plates plus toys. My daughters love this as it means there is less for them to bring when they come to visit.

Anagram Mon 30-Apr-12 16:43:33

I know the majority of us find it odd, but I do have a smidgeon of sympathy for the parent in question. I'm guessing it's the mother, although I may be wrong, and if so and it's her first baby she might be feeling just a bit threatened by the fact that Gran seems so organised and is looking ahead. I'm sure that feeling will pass when she realises you're not trying to take over, Justrolljanet.

Ariadne Mon 30-Apr-12 17:07:28

Yes, anagram you could be right. I do remember feeling unsure and scared at that stage, feeling you had to prove that you were a good mother.

PoppaRob Tue 01-May-12 06:26:01

When my daughter was first pregnant she was well informed on all the intricacies of everything to do with babies and parenthood by her well meaning girlfriends. Bullshit! These 20somethings know it all, far better than any of us oldies ever did apparently! I call it parenting by committee and pissing contest.

Several of my daughter's girlfriends married guys from the same sporting groups as my son in law, so we have a core group of 4 or 5 families who've known each other since the kids were at school. Quite often I'm invited to get togethers where we "oldies" are surrounded by young parents and babies and toddlers. We overhear pontifications and snippets of wisdom and just smile and occasionally share a look or a wink. The upside is that all these little ones have a network of Poppas and Nannas and Grannies who they will go to when they come a cropper or someone's not playing nicely, and all it takes it "the look" from one of the oldies and offender soon changes their tune!

Humbertbear Sat 05-May-12 09:58:32

We resurrected our cot and high chair and found some toys in the loft. We now have more toys than we ever had when we had our own children. We have clothes here too. So do the other grandparents. Mummy and daddy each have two car seats in their car as do we and the other GPs. All 'in case' and to avoid doing the school run and finding we are without a seat. That's the company to buy shares in!

harrigran Sat 05-May-12 10:12:15

You are so right Humbertbear We have bought four, top end car seats over the last few years. We do not see the GC every day but you have to be prepared just in case. Baby and child products are definitely lucrative.

justrolljanet Wed 07-Nov-12 22:12:55

Just an update 6 months on smile , knock on door last Friday, daughters partner arrives, sits down, ................would it be ok for you to look after Millie while I take her mummy to New York for 4 days as I need to propose whilst having breakfast at Tiffany's smile smile smile

Nanadog Wed 07-Nov-12 22:22:30


justrolljanet Wed 07-Nov-12 22:26:31

smile I am so happy I swear I
could explode !!!

janeainsworth Wed 07-Nov-12 22:36:50

Wow! What a romantic future son-in-law grin
Congratulations janet

Ana Wed 07-Nov-12 22:41:47

So glad it worked out for you all, janet smile

nanaej Wed 07-Nov-12 22:43:50

How lovely! just

For the record we have a bedroom known as the kids' room. Has toys, books, clothes for all four DGC, 2 x beds and since yesterday new cot for the little one! We have a bouncy chair, playmat and high chair a buggy in the shed with a variety of wheeled toys, paddling pool and garden toys!

The DGCs sleepover regularly and I look after them at different times during the week so parents can go to work!

justrolljanet Wed 07-Nov-12 22:49:40

He took her there for her 30th, booked it before they knew she was pregnant, on the morning they were due to go she had a threatened miscarriage, emergency scan at 8 weeks and was advised it was safe to go anyway, xrayed and strip searched at Heathrow because she beeped at customs sad felt unwell, knackered, worried whilst away, so surprise now booked for this weekend..........fingers crossed !

Jendurham Thu 08-Nov-12 00:19:12

I still remind my 19 year old grandaughter of the time we moved when she was only 5 years old. She was found lying on her bed sobbing because she wanted to keep her room.
We then moved into a guest house in York, where they all stayed for holidays/ Christmas/ New Year. All rooms had en-suites. Bliss.
Now we share the four grandchildren round between 3 houses over Christmas, etc. and Maria still comes to stay with me. Ikea bedsettees are brilliant for guests. I have toothbrushes for all 4 of them, and a spare night shirt for them all. Each has his or her own toybox and book box. They each have a drawer to leave things in the bedroom.
Don't know how we fit it all in!
When the youngest goes missing she can usually be found on the floor in the bedroom cutting up bits of paper.

Lilygran Thu 08-Nov-12 07:35:58

just do you know what the objection is? When my DS were young and went to stay with either set of grandparents, they had their 'own' room and a toy box and usually spare sets of pyjamas and clothes. We have followed suit with our DGS and from what I know of other people's arrangements, it's pretty common if you can do it. Just recovering from half term. Nearly finished the washing!

goldengirl Thu 08-Nov-12 12:51:51

As we speak the 'children's' room is being redecorated! Hopefully at least a goodly proportion of the toys will be decamped to this room - once I've bought units in which to store them. I too have toothbrushes for them all though I have to start again as I've forgotten whose is which grin!. Named mugs a must methinks. I also keep spare clothes but the older ones are growing so fast I need to have a good sort out!!! I begin with just decorating but it's taking on a life of its own!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!