..to ask for my Mum's engagement ring back?

Specki - how right you are and I've just realised that when all else fails, I come onto Gransnet and it's so lovely - always words of comfort, and a warm glow.

This all reminded me of a patient who had a large collection of beautiful rings although her husband was not rich. One day I asked her about them and she said they had been inherited from her grand ather and then she added - " he was an undertaker". I could never get this awful thought out of my mind.

I would say that it is up to your son to ask for the ring back. Try not to agonise over it - it is just a thing and you have all your memories. If you got it back, would it not remind you of its most recent past instead of your parents?

You are a lovely lot to bother posting these comforting words - lately I've been miserably distracted (and also away), but its lovely to be back in the warm world of Gransnet. from me for all of you xx

Specki

So so happy for you specki

Specki so pleased for you!

Specki Such a good thing to happen. Perhaps she is not so bad after all. I agree that the ring has sentimental value and understand that you would want it back.

I hope this means they are going to be civilised about the divorce and that you won't have anything more to worry about as things move forward.

specki

Fantastic news specki, happy for you and I think your DS is extremely thoughtful [hugs]

This has really brought a lump in my throat-so glad for the lovely outcome. What a thoughtful son.

But you've still got your sense of humour specki

yes thank you all for your responses and janeainsworth you are right, he is a lovely man and quite undeserving of this awful rupture in his life. I pray one day he'll find someone who truly loves him.

you will all laugh at me when I say that I'm now beating myself up about typing "I got woke up". An old pedant like me and I forgot the 'n' xx

I am glad you got it back specki

Back where it belongs specki

about the ring of course sorry for the marriage breakup.

What a happy ending specki you could write a short story about it.

Your son sounds a lovely man specki

That is a great end to your sad story - you must be so relieved.

update: the other night I got woke up in the middle of the night thinking of my son and his children and this horrible break up they are going through. I heard my phone vibrating in the bottom of my bag and got out of bed to switch it off. I couldn't resist checking the text though and it said, "I got Nannas ring back for you Mum". Bless him - I hadn't even mentioned it

specki.....you have every right to feel very attached to this ring, I hope your DIL can see the justice in your request. It will all come down to the timing and the manner of the request. I do hope you get it resolved.
I have my Grandma's wedding ring that my Mum took to wearing after the dear old thing had died. I now have it and wear it with pride. I dont take it away on holidays abroad though as I would be so upset if it got lost.

I gave my mothers eternity ring to my daughter- the burglars took it! My daughter was safe that was what mattered.

I wear my Husband's Grandmother's engagement ring and would certainly offer it back if we ever split up. I love the ring but it belongs in the family. It is in my will to go to my elder son when I die.

Perhaps a well thought out letter saying how sad you feel about everything that has happened [miss out the bit about possibly wanting to rip her head off at this moment in time] and how you feel the need to have the ring with it being your mum's. If you leave it longer your relationship might deteriorate to the point that there is no contact at all. I do understand how you feel about it; reading this thread made me go and dig out my mum's wedding ring which I no longer wear [partly because I'm so scared of losing it if I do]. Symbolic things take on great importance at times such as this, and getting the ring back would be quite cathartic for you.

That's a difficult one specki, I completely understand your feelings regarding the ring. I, too, get very emotionally attached to "things" and I think that you should gently request that it be returned to you. I hope it all turns out well for you but right now you are going through great emotional trauma