I'm in my 50s, with grown up children, and (thankfully) both parents still independent. But I'm still having issues with my mum that, if I'd had enough backbone, I've have resolved decades ago...
I stopped getting clothes for my daughter when she was in her late teens, as I realised that she had different taste from me. My mother is still buying me clothes from charity shops and getting offended when I don't want them. I've nothing against charity shops, as I use them myself, it's just that I don't like what she does. I've worn the clothes she got me for a long time, and it was only when I got into my 50s that I found the confidence to say 'no thank you' and find my own style. Why is she (still) so upset by this?
So, moving on, as she never spends much on herself, I thought I'd buy her a really nice cardigan from Fenn Wright and Manson for Xmas. She seemed pleased with it, but when I last visited, she literally thrust it back at me, saying she didn't like it (basically as tit for tat).
Reading this back, I see that many people will think that I deserved it, but I think she was being petty. I wasn't trying to control her, just give her something nice for a change. You could perhaps say that that was what she was thinking all these years, but it has felt like I've been controlled, which is different.
