Presents for Presents Sake, and Buying for Buyings sake

I haven't bought gifts for anyone for a few years now. I give my grandchildren money, as do others, which they save and then buy something they really want and couldn't afford out of their pocket money.

My friends all agreed to stop buying silly little gifts for each other unless it's a big birthday,when we club together and give tokens, usually John Lewis.

It is much better, no hassle,no shopping and everyone is happy.

I always consult with DSs and DiLs before I buy presents for GC whether it is for birthdays or Christmas. I tell them my budget and then we decide between us what I will buy. It works very well. I don't waste my money and everyone is happy.

Oh, such a good idea, both of you - I do wish I could get DH to agree! We have two grown up daughters between us and although one would be quite happy about it, I don't think the other one would be able to resist the urge to splash out on 'just one or two' presents for her dad and me, which would defeat the object of the exercise.

Sorry, glitabo, your post wasn't there when I wrote my reply.
I have suggested to DH that we just pass around a £20 note between the adults - the end result would be the same!

Ana , you could always compromise and do a sort of "Secret Santa" ?

Hmm...how would that work, phoenix? I know in theory, DD and her colleagues do it at work, but is it just that you buy one present which would suit anyone?
(Obviously the GCs wouldn't be included - they're usually easy to buy for!)

I always rather like gift vouchers. There's something nice about going to,say, Boots and having to buy yourself something nice. Some people [my son is one] love going shopping for presents for people. But, unless you know someone really well it's difficult to buy them something they'll really like; we all have such different taste in things. I buy my children National trust membership each year for their birthday, and buy presents for the grandchildren at Christmas but not their parents [I always tell them what I intend to buy in case they don't agree with it]. Christmas is so stressful given that it's only one day. I agree totally with you, phoenix. I've got a bah humbug sign floating around somewhere [my Christmas decorations sometimes don't get put away], but I still 'love' Christmas. As someone once said, it's the one time in the year when we all make the effort to get in touch with people that we've been meaning to visit/call/write to all year. And that's important. As for bah humbug; can you imagine Christmas without A Christmas Carol? I can't.

My DiL gives me tips about what to buy for the GC - even sends me the link to Ebay or Amazon. This means that I give them something they really want - but I think they will soon be plumping for money.

We buy small token presents for our adult children, easy for girls - pamper stuff or tokens, but for blokes often results in an exchange of bottles. The little ones get a small present to open and money towards swimming lessons or similar. Only direct descendants - and my mother. Everyone else just gets a card, but at Christmas I do spend time writing in the ones where we don't keep in touch much. To that person - NO ROUND ROBINS!

I talk to my daughters about the grandchildren's christmas and birthday presents. My daughters are getting a gift voucher each for Toni and Guy because if I buy for anywhere else they'll spend them on the children. I also buy them socks, knickers, smellies and sweets. It's a bit of a family joke and they'd be disappointed if they didn't get them lol. The SILs get a gift voucher each.

Our children get toys to the value of £100 give or take a few pounds. No more. After all how many toys can a child play with?

We limit our gifts to each other to £50. Last year we had no money and limited it to £10.

Ana , you put the name of each person taking part into a hat (or similar!) you each draw out a slip without saying which name you have drawn. You then buy a gift for that person within the pre-agreed spending limit.

My mother always used to ring up and ask me what I wanted for my birthday and xmas. Although there usually are things I want, I don't want to ask other people to buy them, so some years ago I asked her to buy something useful for someone else instead each time she wanted to give me a present. There are special charities through which you can give someone a donkey or a place to store their harvest so it doesn't get ruined before they can get a decent proce for it, and so on. Smaller things too.

She liked that idea.

price not proce

See, told you on your thread that we need an edit function!

We decided as a family not to buy for the adults anymore just the under 18's, this year OH and I have each said that there is nothing that either of us need so we will probably just exchange a token gift to each other.

Last Christmas, we gave everyone money, albeit not a lot, we`re not well off, but the youngest grandchild we bought presents for, as he was only 3, the other grandchildren are growing up now. We`ll probably do the same again this year.

We are in the habit of buying gifts for a set of some close friends. We are all in a similar, lucky, position of having reasonable pensions, homes and everything we need to have a 'comfortable' retirement. I have not broached the subject of gifts with them but do feel we should stop or nominate a charity and donate to that instead. As a compromise this year I am buying them all bottles of olive oil and some olives and then sponsoring new olive trees for a Palestinian family farm in the West Bank or Gaza. Similar idea to Bags suggestion.

OH has a birthday close to Christmas so last year I bought him (us!) tickets for the theatre and 2 nights in a great hotel in Soho. We spent 2 days catching up on exhibitions etc we had not got round to seeing!! Might do a repeat this year!

We always ask each other if there's anything we particularly want first. we tend to stick to relatively inexpensive gifts and if I have any money spare I add something from the Good Gifts charity catalogue. You can usually find something in there that will have a connection for the recipient.

I confess I love giving presents to my family, particularly at Christmas, but in our family we have a system of consulting about birthdays and people providing lists at Christmas. There is no guarantee they will get everything, or anything, on the list, sometimes you see something you know people want/would like but it hasnt occurred to them to put it on their list.

Of course there is the occasional disaster, but on my birthday in August, DH gave me a new camera as my previous one had just died, DS gave me a book I had said I wanted and DD bought a book of vintage embroidery patterns that she found at a boot sale, she knew I would like it because I have a sewing project on using vintage fabrics and embroidery and I wanted to add some new hand embroidery and had been looking for patterns. All hit the spot and I am already noting ideas for my Christmas list.

The book of embroidery patterns sounds like a very special present, in that it means that your DD remembered what you'd said and thought about you when she saw them. Literaly priceless. You must have been delighted .

Crimson, I suspect that she was also looking forward to using it herself! She is very good needlewoman and makes all kinds of items using vintage materials. She got me started on doing similar projects, so I suspect said book is going to go back and forth between us like a tennis ball. Having said that, yes, I did appreciate the thought. She is a very kind and thoughtful person

I don't like the secret santa tradition much. I don't take part with the one at my place of work anymore because of past bad experiences of tacky pressies. (I would always buy a nice present at the agreed amount but others don't)
At my workplace you are given the name of a work mate and you buy them something but no one knows who is buying for who. The boss gives out the labelled presents but last year there was a bit of a do when he gave out a present intended for someone else of the same name and one of them wouldn't swop! Not sure we will have one next year after that!

Isn't that the same as 'secret santa' tattygran? I thought it was, but perhaps I'm wrong, never having been involved in it myself.

Ana my thoughts exactly!