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The Granny Alphabet.

(32 Posts)
HildaW Sat 28-Sep-13 14:31:03

Am just perusing the Telegraph Magazine in today's paper...on page 22 it recommends Tim Walker's celebration of 'all things grande dame' and describes it as being full of 'affectionate portraits'.
Now, I am a Granny and I have a sense of humour and I am aware that bits of me are getting a bit worn out....but from what I can see in this magazine it is full of stale clichés that were out of date when my Grandma was alive. Normally I shrug this sort of thing off but honestly it has actually really annoyed me.
If anyone else sees this I'd be interested to know if its just me.

Grannylin Sun 29-Sep-13 17:34:57

Also just noticed an ad on P36 of the Review section for the New Granny's Survival Guide ( from Gransnet advice...you know the one!) so have emailed kids to say...please do not buy me this, or The Granny Alphabet, for Christmas.. ...even as a joke!! hmm

JessM Sun 29-Sep-13 16:42:03

It's a wonder that chap has not included the Wonga puppets as illustrations.

annodomini Sun 29-Sep-13 15:49:37

My ex, when asked for a donation for a tombola, used to buy a tin of prunes, remove the label and give it as a 'mystery' prize. Goodness knows what the recipients thought!

HildaW Sun 29-Sep-13 15:36:14

I had thought so annodomini - but certain folks were not amused....it was back in the 90s and a C of E school but I still thought it was pretty harmless!

annodomini Sun 29-Sep-13 15:23:38

Just right for the tombola, Hilda?

gracesmum Sun 29-Sep-13 15:10:58

You have reminded me - they were called Pickled Grannies, not squishy - DDs found that hilarious as Granny was not averse to a G&T on occasion!
Oh happy days when ignorance was bliss!

HildaW Sun 29-Sep-13 13:44:44

Gracesmum, saw something similar to that but just using pieces of the leg of tights that were shaped into little bottoms and when popped into a jam jar were labelled 'Pickled Bums'.
At a Pre-School raffle can distinctly remember most of us chuckling over them but a certain noisy minority in the Committee thought they were beyond the pale and asked for them to be taken out of the raffle!!

gracesmum Sun 29-Sep-13 13:25:00

While accepting that little DGC are unlikely to be assaulted by their Granny, DC could very well be be and I could foresee and very chilly atmosphere over Christmas..........were anyone foolish to go down that road.

Our DDs when tiny used to do this thing with toes of tights stuffed with cotton wool then tied tight with thread to make heads, they would then draw faces on them and fill a jamjar with them., These were know as squishy grannies and at the time I couldn't understand why my MIL was not amused! blush

JessM Sun 29-Sep-13 12:38:30

It could only be given as a joke present by someone who trusted their G not to assault them with it. Appalling stereotyping rubbish.

soop Sun 29-Sep-13 12:37:44

gracesmum You are soooooooooooooooooooooo right. flowers

gracesmum Sun 29-Sep-13 12:11:53

Heaven help ANYBODY who thinks this would be a suitable C......... present for a Granny!!

Rosiebee Sun 29-Sep-13 12:01:32

It says in the blurb on the link that it was in memory of his own granny. If she was still around I wonder if she'd be whacking him round the ears with her walking stick. I would, given the chance. My dear old mum had the stoop, twinsets and rainhoods as depicted, she was 80 and horribly arthritic, but in her heart she didn't and would have hated to have been seen like that. angry

HildaW Sun 29-Sep-13 10:42:49

Yes penguin....it seemed to me as if someone was trying too hard and missed the point. Yes, we need to be sympathetic to people as they grow older, be a little more patient when behind someone at the till who cannot bag as quickly as the till person thinks they should etc (and I include myself in that).
However, the whole pastel cardigan walking aid grey perm combo does no one any favours. No one wants to be classed as 'elderly' we just want to be seen as the person we are whether that is feisty or friendly, artistic or practical, nice or nasty even, but now with perhaps the odd mobility problem or slower reactions etc.
There are some far better 'Granny' themed books around, seem to remember a lovely children's one about Grandma being a retired agent or something who rode a motorbike still.....a much better take on getting older.

penguinpaperback Sat 28-Sep-13 20:53:31

Oh yes I read the Telegraph article too, this morning HildaW and I'm so glad I'm not alone at feeling annoyed. I'm 54 and because of illness I have to use a crutch. I'm also very slow at walking now and I often have much older ladies whizzing by. I didn't like the pictures at all but I had wondered if I was being over sensitive, (I know I am at times blush) as I used to walk, run everywhere. But I felt the ladies had been made a figure of fun.
I'll remember 'W is for waving walking sticks' smile gracesmum.

Ana Sat 28-Sep-13 20:36:35

Yes - you're right, gracesmum! grin As you were...

gracesmum Sat 28-Sep-13 20:31:37

I never zzzz in front of Montalbano - young or old!!!grin

ninathenana Sat 28-Sep-13 19:42:21

Well done Gracesmum made me chuckle. OH wanted to know why. He liked it too.

Ana Sat 28-Sep-13 19:18:09

Bergerac...? You could have made that Montalbano, gracesmum! grin

HMHNanna Sat 28-Sep-13 19:15:17

Fantastic *Gracesmum! I couldn't agree with you more.smile

JessM Sat 28-Sep-13 19:11:18

Lovely gracesmum - you had a creative day

tiggypiro Sat 28-Sep-13 19:00:04

Brilliant Gracesmum ! So much better than those pics in The Telegraph. Maybe he used actors !

gracesmum Sat 28-Sep-13 18:33:33

A is for the advantages of patience, wisdom and time for the DGC
B is for Babysitting - did I mention that?
C is for the Childcare which saves mummies and daddies loads of money (see above)
D is for the DGC for whom we would lie down in front of a BUS!
E is for the energy some of us can only find in shortish bursts (e.g. for a sleepover or 2)
F is for the fount of wisdom which we can provide but have the sense to keep shtum
G is for Gransnet - where would we be without it
H is for unstinting help we willingly provide
and I - well that never came first in the alphabet and usually comes right at the end of the list of priorities
J is for journeys - the miles we clock up for babysitting, granny duties, emergency cover
K is for Kindness - that sums up a Granny's love
L is for Love - as I just said up above
M is for Mumsnet - we call it "the other place" (or it could be for Montalbano to bring a smile to your face)
N is for the news we share with other Gransnetters
O(h) is for the exclamation uttered when WTF won't do
P is for the patience with which we hear the others' point of view
Q is for the quality that GN brings to life
R is for all the reading with which we while away the hours
S is for the smiles we raise as we offer wine and flowers
T - well where would we be without a brew or two
U is for unoaid childcare many gladly provide
V is for values, the old fashioned ones often turn out best
W is for waving walking sticks at whippersnappers young or cheeky
X is for the wet kisses with "I love you Gwanny" which make it all worthwhile
Y is for young - don't write us off as old
and Z well, there's zimmer frames of course and Zen and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzin front of Bergerac, but I'd rather say it's for zest for life - there's plenty of that in us old dogs yet!!

Gally Sat 28-Sep-13 18:19:23

£24.95 for a load of old tosh (only £22 on Amazon). Is the old dear in the rain hat Maggie Thatcher? I'm sure it is grin I think Tim Walker should be approached by Gransnet with a view to showing him what a Granny really is - an Alphabet of GN'ers a la Calender Girls - we could show him a thing or six.......wink

merlotgran Sat 28-Sep-13 18:06:45

Planet, I mean.

merlotgran Sat 28-Sep-13 18:05:16

What panet is he on? angry