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Facebook friends!

(46 Posts)
anniezzz09 Fri 14-Nov-14 09:44:54

So I used to use Facebook, I barely look at it now but I just happened to look this morning (because my bloomin' daughters message me through it) and see that someone I included in a bunch of people I decided to lose, ie. defriend has just sent me a Friend request.
Aargh, Facebook I hate it. I decided to slim down my list of 'friends' because I was feeling so annoyed at the collecting of people who are barely friends and some not at all. In fact, I only got into using it because of my daughters and one very old friend who I rediscovered through the internet and she is one of those people who just lives on Facebook.
I am though feeling embarrassed about the woman who has sent me a Friend request. I included her in the dissing because I had got to the point of being infuriated by her both because of what she posted and because of her general way of being in life (only her problems are of any account and no one can help her, we all just don't understand).
So, shall I pretend I didn't see her request blush or guiltily accept it and carry on as 'normal'. I don't see her often though she does live near me. We know each other through past work things. confused
Anyone on this forum use Facebook too, now or in the past? What do you think of it?

rosequartz Sat 29-Nov-14 21:11:17

I only have a very few 'Facebook friends'. I ignore most requests to be friends and have only ever had to unfriend someone - not because I didn't like her but because she tweeted absolutely every move she made and for some reason it all appeared on Facebook - her life filled pages and I couldn't sort the wood from the trees.

It is great to be able to see what DC and DGC are up to, especially since two DC are overseas and lead quite exciting lives! And I belong to a couple of closed or private groups from school and work which keep me up-to-date.
There is no need to accept a 'friend' request if you don't want to.

janeainsworth Sat 29-Nov-14 18:27:37

Have a lovely time Harrigran. Something very special about 90th birthday parties!

harrigran Sat 29-Nov-14 18:24:00

I am off to a 90th birthday party tonight and I am going to meet two of my facebook friends who have travelled from America for the celebration. I thought I was going to surprise them but one of them has just asked if I was attending the party grin

broomsticks Fri 28-Nov-14 17:52:15

I love Facebook for the funny videos and quizzes people post and for keeping in touch but I don't put much personal stuff up. You can be 'friends' with people without following them and getting overwhelmed.

Ariadne Wed 26-Nov-14 16:03:17

I love FB, but, like most of you, keep my privacy settings very tight, and don't accept friends whom I don't want. It is very simple.

With scattered friends after a very mobile early married life, and DC and DGC (the older ones) on FB, I love the feeling of being on touch.

Ana Wed 26-Nov-14 15:33:22

You can form a closed or secret group on FB can't you? I think there's a GN group (maybe more than one!) but don't know its status.

Lona Wed 26-Nov-14 15:30:04

anniezzz09 You can set your privacy so that no one can see your photos or your other friends, then no one can poke about!

annodomini Wed 26-Nov-14 13:32:34

My teenage pen friend in the USA found an old letter from me and her DiL found me for her on FB. We now email each other regularly and have found that we have a great deal in common after sixty years. We are also FB friends, but don't need to use that facility very often. When we were teenagers, our airmails took at least a week to arrive; now emails are instantaneous. 60 years ago that would have been in the realm of sci fi.

janerowena Wed 26-Nov-14 12:09:19

I do, I look for the little green dot that shows that my DCs are still alive. I can see when they were last on, and then I know that all is right with the world. It's DS's 2nd year at uni and until he leaves and grows up a bit and stops posting things like '3am kebab is the best kebab' when I know he has lectures at 9am, then I shall probably continue to use it to keep an eye on him. I'll grow out of it eventually.

Greyduster Wed 26-Nov-14 11:45:33

I recently joined fb to find a person I used to be very friendly with. I haven't seen her for over forty years but I have thought about her a lot over the years so I googled her name and found a lady who looked so much like her that I didn't think it could be anyone else. I sent a message to her through her fb page, to try and find out if it was, in fact, her, to which she did not reply, but friended me. I sent her another message and again received no reply, so I have given up. We are now facebook friends but I still don't know whether it is actually her. All sounds a bit lame doesn't it? Having been a means to an end that didn't work out, I don't look at facebook these days.

kittylester Mon 17-Nov-14 20:38:34

A fluffy kitchen would be awfully difficult a to keep clean!!

sparkygran Mon 17-Nov-14 19:01:27

Must admit I love FB though only have a manageable number of friends and don`t accept FRs if I don`t want to.

janerowena Mon 17-Nov-14 17:58:27

I just thought you had all bases covered! grin

ninathenana don't be so quick to think badly - the poor woman probably likes you and wanted to stay in touch. When I left Ex I would have loved to stay in touch with his sisters through fb, and they with me, but they felt they couldn't be openly friends for fear of being thought of as disloyal. So we have to have secret emails instead with photo attachments.

anniezzz09 Mon 17-Nov-14 17:30:01

Even if you mute people, its the very public nature of FB that is beginning to give me the creeps. I really don't want the woman who sent me a Friend request poking about in my photos etc or going on to look at my children' s pages, etc. And I have people who post embarrassing things or just too many fluffy kitchens, etc. At least one such has umpteen eager people liking everything but she notices if I don't!!! So I suppose reading all the comments is clarifying things for me and I'm thinking at the moment that I'm going to delete my page and the kids will have to cope!
P.s that should be fluffy kittens but my phone won't let me change it! Oh well, fluffy kitchen is certainly good for a laugh grin

janeainsworth Fri 14-Nov-14 23:14:10

faye that was very thoughtless of your niece, wasn't it.
Your poor son sad

susieb755 Fri 14-Nov-14 21:56:55

I love FB - ignore requests from people I dont know that well, or accept and mute them

I store all my photos there as a double back up , and use FB messenger as much as text, I also use whatsapp a lot

I think it is fab, especially for keeping in touch with all the children, their partners etc

NfkDumpling Fri 14-Nov-14 21:12:16

That's probably exactly what she was thinking Nina!

ninathenana Fri 14-Nov-14 20:55:35

Only yesterday I had a friends request from DD's new partners ex MiL why ??
Although I was tempted, just for a moment. So I could spy grin

Lona Fri 14-Nov-14 18:11:58

One of my good friends on fb used to have a catering business, and she has loads of GBBO friends, professional and amateur bakers/cooks/cakemakers etc.
Every day it's food, food, food! No wonder I'm getting fatter!

Faye Fri 14-Nov-14 18:10:31

I had a friend request and it flicked off to cyber space when I opened it, I will never know who it was.

When my mother died very late at night my niece put the news immediately on FB. DD1's friend who is on all of our FB wrote commiserations and tagged our names. It then alerted my son by his mobile that there was a post with his name and that is how he found out. I had kept him informed of what was happening and was going to phone him in the morning. He was annoyed that someone would tag his name late at night about his GM dying and deleted himself from FB.

absentgrandma Fri 14-Nov-14 17:35:54

I'm much the same as the rest of you.... good for keeping in touch with family and nice to have 'instant' photos from mobiles when the GC are having a fun day out.... especially when you live a long way away from each other. On the other hand like janerowena I do get fed-up with friends posting selfies in night clubs or on holiday...even worse when, like one 'friend' ' posting photos of every drink, from the departure lounge to the last raucous night in the hotel complex! And another friend who posts sickly sentimental verses, usually about the joy of grandchildren. Yeh I know I'm a grumpy old cynicsad

janerowena Fri 14-Nov-14 14:22:28

That's ok, they can all move over there and we can carry on using it to keep in touch with family and friends.

I do have a couple of friends whose posts have surprised me, showing sides to them that I hadn't known existed. One is divorced and no longer young and goes clubbing at every opportunity - not in a bad way but I hide her posts because there are only so many selfies of her in a crowded club I can stand. The other is obsessed by dogs and has over 1000 'friends' and likes all of their posts, I can only cope with one beaten/starved/trained to fight/stolen/rescue dog a week, let alone every five minutes.

kittylester Fri 14-Nov-14 14:17:47

My Sil complains that I know more about her daughter's life than she does. I find out on FB and tell her because she doesn't do FB. She complains that her DD doesn't contact her. My children and I hardly ever phone each other but we email, fb, wattsapp etc so don't need the regular once a week phone calls.

Soutra Fri 14-Nov-14 13:59:06

So it seems we agree that FB is fine as long as we make it work for us and don't become "slaves " to it. Anyway isn't it old hat with the cool young things who all use Instagram instead?smile

tanith Fri 14-Nov-14 13:53:03

I use FB all the time to keep in touch with family some of whom are abroad , it keeps me up to date with all their goings on and allows me into the life of a new grandson as his Dad sends little video's and pics of him to me via messenger all the time, without it I would hardly know the little chap..
I only add people I want to befriend and ignore those I don't if they don't like it , tough!!