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An observation behaviour online

(325 Posts)
magpie123 Tue 28-Apr-15 17:55:41

I have noticed recently (although it has probably been happening for a while) certain posters who vehemently condemn a post or poster then their so called followers join in the tirade as well.

It seems to me like childhood bullying, sad really in my opinion.

I have noticed a few names missing who used to post quite frequently.

Ana Mon 04-May-15 12:50:06

I can't see how that would work, because it's the subject matter of some threads which gets people's danders up. Would the 'no holds barred' thread just be a string of rude, offensive posts with no particular theme...? confused

Elegran Mon 04-May-15 12:45:11

How about starting one Petallus ? Clearly labelled, "No holds barred on this thread and no objections or reporting anyone to GNHQ. Say what you like"

It would be very interesting to see whether it is used as intended, nd whether aggression levels elsewhere drop.

petallus Mon 04-May-15 12:33:08

That would be fine but to balance it and add interest I would like a 'no holds barred' thread as well.

granjura Mon 04-May-15 11:28:38

I know- but I would like the option of blocking anyone who is regularly gratuitously rude and aggressive. I hve no problem with anyone who disagrees strongly, who has totally opposite views- as long as they can discuss those issues calmly and politely rather than shoot from the hip. And I am prepared to listen and at times change or adjust my own views- again, with above proviso. This is the way I was brought up, to debate and discuss- and to listen to the other/s and try to persuade without being rude.

Ana Mon 04-May-15 11:15:59

You can block someone from PM-ing you on here, too.

granjura Mon 04-May-15 11:13:56

Exactly- you do not see their posts and they cannot pm you either. Brilliant.

Ana Mon 04-May-15 10:53:58

How does that work? Do you just not see their posts?

granjura Mon 04-May-15 09:43:37

Wise words Absent- but oh so much easier than done at times.

As said, I think an 'ignore poster' optiong would be great. On the other Forum, I have 1 member on ignore only, but it makes all the difference ;)

absent Mon 04-May-15 06:08:17

I think I have posted "Here we go round the mulberry bush" quite a few times on threads identical to this one. Nothing is resolved, tempers flare, people feel wounded, people feel hard-done-by or misunderstood, people wonder if they are the "targets" of being part of a clique [so-called followers] or aggressive opinionated numpties. All these types of threads ever do is stir and distress.

If you haver a problem with a particular poster or posters, either reply directly, contact GNHQ or ignore it but don't seethe.

Eloethan Sun 03-May-15 17:52:14

POGS - and ?

POGS Sun 03-May-15 13:06:04

Well there was a clue in the wording.

'certain posters who vehemently condemn a post or a poster then their so called followers join in the tirade as well'.

Soutra Sun 03-May-15 12:25:26

Like "lighting the blue touch paper and retiring" hmm

We should be wise enough not to fall for it by now, but oops! grin

Eloethan Sun 03-May-15 12:23:10

I'm not sure what the purpose of the original post was, other than to start an argument so it's hardly surprising that that is exactly what happened.

cazthebookworm Sun 03-May-15 10:22:35

Well said Ariadne and Vegasmags and one or two other "sensible" ones, you know who you are!!

Otherwise, some very childish behaviour on here, pathetic, sad, and so unnecessary.

Ariadne Sat 02-May-15 21:01:59

I'll leave you to it now, I think.

Bellanonna Sat 02-May-15 20:06:12

Now looks as though I,m in danger of joining an even bigger clique, having read further serious comments.

Bellanonna Sat 02-May-15 20:03:11

Apologies. I posted in wrong place. I was "only" !! On page 11.

Bellanonna Sat 02-May-15 20:01:27

Ariadne. Nice to read a post which is not trivial. And I agree with your comments. Does this mean I,m forming a clique with you and magpie ? Oh well......

trisher Sat 02-May-15 19:43:27

I actually think this could be a really interesting post if we could all be a little more objective and honest. One of the reasons for not giving children mobile phones early is because the use of phones deprives them of the normal responses and feedback they receive when speaking to someone face to face so they don't learn what upsets people and this inhibits their emotional development. So it is entirely possible that we are posting on GN things we wouldn't normally say, because we would have to see how upset someone was. On the other hand I was brought up with a real respect for argument. If you believed something you were expected to argue the point. Healthy discussion and argument harms no-one.

granjura Sat 02-May-15 18:54:20

hear hear Vegas and Ariadne- very sad and to be honest, so tiresome it's best to keep away sad

durhamjen Sat 02-May-15 18:53:53

I agree, jingl. It makes it sound like the good old days, when the sun always shone.

thatbags Sat 02-May-15 18:47:17

I guess we all know what we intend, jings. I've been wondering today if those posts that come across to me as really bad-tempered were intended to come across like that. (no, not you)

jinglbellsfrocks Sat 02-May-15 18:43:56

And now.... we are all left guessing which category we fall into. hmm

#paranoiainducingpost

vegasmags Sat 02-May-15 18:39:57

I agree Ariadne. I have always valued the support and help of some GNetters, and have enjoyed meeting with some face to face. I can only deplore the recent outbreak of sheer nastiness, which seems to have plumbed new depths. There are some who just seem to enjoy creating havoc and unpleasantness for its own sake. I can only speculate the sort of gratification they derive from these activities - mostly I try to feel sorry for them, thinking that their life must be sadly lacking in some way. I always thought that one of the things that distinguished GN from Mumsnet was that we have had the benefit of experience, and hopefully have learned some tolerance and wisdom along the way.

I do hope we can get back to being the sort of GN I value.

Ariadne Sat 02-May-15 18:00:47

i have been reading through all the conversations and threads that I've missed, and I am sad about the vitriol and general unpleasantness that seems to be emerging in several areas. I do think I recognise the instigators and stirrers, the peacemakers and those who try to divert a thread out of nastiness.

I have been a member of GN almost from the beginning, and there is nothing surprising going on as far as I can see. There are those who can debate and discuss, and see different perspectives on an issue, those who can't and those who have to castigate others when they don't get their own way. And those who are just unpleasant. I'd say it was situation normal but the nastiness does seem to have reached a new level lately.

Nevertheless, despite all this, I also see, on other threads, the affection and support that is so freely given, with sensitivity, to those who really need it, and this is the essence of GN. I hope it will continue thus.