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Swearing in front of children

(111 Posts)
lucygran Tue 26-Jun-18 13:34:28

I couldn't believe my ears the other day when I heard my SIL shout obscenities at the football in front of my DGC.

I understand football is something that people feel passionate about, but I just can't fathom ever using such language in the presence of a child for fear that they will pick up such habits themselves.

I didn't say anything, but am I alone in being shocked at this?

Shizam Thu 28-Jun-18 01:01:42

I’ve worked in all sorts of places where swearing is almost common place. I don’t mind it, except when it becomes virtual punctuation to a sentence. The word ‘like’ has replaced the f word in common parlance and is utterly annoying. Every other word. I prefer the swearing!

petra Wed 27-Jun-18 23:00:34

A friend of my father often worked at Kensington palace when Princess Margaret and Lord Snowden were in residence, she could swear for the Olympics grin
But then, the Kray twins wouldn't have swearing in front of women. Funny old world.

Luckygirl Wed 27-Jun-18 22:29:23

TBH I think people get worked up about swearing unnecessarily. Intent is what matters. If someone tells you to F off, we can assume the intent is pretty negative. If they say F***ing hell when they drop a bottle of milk, it means nothing and is not worth getting steamed up about.

B9exchange Wed 27-Jun-18 22:23:31

I had a very sheltered upbringing, and when my future husband took me up to London to see a show, I had to ask the meaning of the words daubed on the walls of the tube, to his astonishment!
Have always hated swearing, my children know this and don't swear in front of me, the DH has been known to let fly, followed by apology when he calms down. But blasphemy actually makes me feel ill it is so upsetting. In one of my first places of work, one of the ladies regularly used to say 'Jesus wept', and in the end I plucked up courage to ask her not to use that expression. It actually worked, and she didn't do it again, not only that, but she used to apologise for any swear word in my presence. If people can actually control themselves, then why don't they? smile

kaz59 Wed 27-Jun-18 22:17:21

I have just returned from New York and was really shocked when walking through an expensive store heard a child of about 10 years of age saying to her mother "if you had f**king brought me earlier I would of got the f**king dress" I nearly walked into a wall in shock!!!!!

pollyperkins Wed 27-Jun-18 21:29:48

Well I say blimey but I was told it is short for God Blind me (as in Gor blimey.) Similarly crikey is a euphemism for Christ, as is Crumbs (via crust -get it?) and Bloody refers to christs blood. All swear words derive from either religious oaths or 'rude' parts of the body or bodily functions either sexual or excretory. This is one reason I don't like them. Unpleasant or blasphemous!
Obviously those of us who dont swear use euphemisms too : obvious exMples as flipping, heck, sugar, (no prizes for guessing the derivations!)
Funnily enough I do say Good Lord or For God's Sake (but not OMG ) and damn but I am rather offended when people say 'Jesus' as a swear word.
Probably hypocritical.

Deedaa Wed 27-Jun-18 21:08:49

One of my father's favourite swear words was Blimey. I said it one day when I was very young and got a long telling off from my grandmother (his MiL) Naturally the next time he said it I told him that grandma said it was a very naughty word and he shouldn't say it! his reply was " mutter, mutter, Grandma, mutter, mutter, Grandma" grin

Iam64 Wed 27-Jun-18 21:08:04

Sorry sparkly 1000 - I was typing on my mobile, which I sometimes believe has been taken over by someone/something in cyber space. My post should have read:
Couldn't the f**g hell comment have been dealt with immediately by your husband? A formal complaint seems like over kill to me. (I went on to express hope that the GP 's obvious shock at seeing the flare up, resulted in effective treatment)

Riverwalk Wed 27-Jun-18 20:50:05

OH who's only in his forties reported this to the practice manager.

Is your husband such a delicate flower sparkly? I agree with Iam, overkill.

Jalima1108 Wed 27-Jun-18 20:46:32

^A formal complaint seems overkill to me. I do hope the gps
shock at seeing the flareup resulted in effective treatment.^

Hope you don't mind me translating Iam64, in case you are not on here.

sparkly1000 Wed 27-Jun-18 20:43:23

Iam64, " Kill to me" Not sure what you are meaning by your statement? Can you explain please.

Jalima1108 Wed 27-Jun-18 20:31:28

'Oh Dear' doesn't seem to hit the mark when someone has cut you up on the motorway.

LadyGracie Wed 27-Jun-18 20:29:53

I do call people some 'not very nice names' when I'm driving but hate to hear swearing.

codfather Wed 27-Jun-18 20:23:44

I hate swearing at the best of times! Whilst you can't stop children hearing swear words, you can lead by example. People have been castigated for swearing but nobody's been castigated for not!

Jalima1108 Wed 27-Jun-18 19:52:49

Is 'Oh shit' really swearing?
I ask because I seem to have said it twice lately, through sheer fright, both times when some idiot motorist has caused a near accident.

Iam64 Wed 27-Jun-18 19:31:04

Couldn’t the f.hell comment have been addressed immediately by your husband? A formal complaint seems over
Kill to me. I do hope the gPs
Shock at seeing the flAre
Up resulted in effective treatment.

sparkly1000 Wed 27-Jun-18 19:13:19

My OH visited his GP earlier this year due to a flare up of his skin condition, the 30ish GP took one look at it and said f*cking Hell.
OH who's only in his forties reported this to the practice manager.
So unprofessional. As a retired nurse, if I had been heard to use that language with a patient I would have been on a warning and disciplinary action.

grannyactivist Wed 27-Jun-18 18:50:44

I'm saving up for when I really, really, really want to shock. I think my close family might actually faint if they heard me swear. gringringringrin

Brigidsdaughter Wed 27-Jun-18 18:20:58

I swear regularly, mostly at home and driving, but am aware of my audience and would never swear at anyone.
I'm not a dedicated football fan but can see it's a very skilful game and watch with DH occasionally. Yes, the players are overpaid, often not at all articulate, but this doesn't make them worth a less as human beings. We can all sneer at 'new money' but they are noticed more because they are well known.

Kathcan1 Wed 27-Jun-18 17:11:32

Sorry unacceptable! Not me to inter fear in my own DGC upbringing, I would have complained about hearing it myself. “Language please” or “there are children present”. should have been enough to tip him off.

dogsmother Wed 27-Jun-18 16:25:05

Ne ver in front of the children, we never did. Our parents never did.
However when my youngest was doing A level drama she had to say a rather nasty on stage .....she and I practiced rather hard and became rather good at swearing generally.
I also enjoy a good old Friday night out in a pub where the language of some can become quite fruity...
To b honest it doesn’t worry me in the least jus5 not in front of little ones.

grandtanteJE65 Wed 27-Jun-18 16:21:55

I am no longer shocked by the language some people use; I just dislike it intensely, but have long since realised that standards have changed in regard to swearing and using the rudest possible words for parts of the body, sex etc.

By today's standards my parents didn't swear when we were children, but actually, they frequently did say things like "damn, bloody hell, shut up etc." When I was about five. I shocked my mother by asking how old you had to be to be allowed to say "shut up"? When she asked what on earth I meant, I said that my sister and I had to say "be quiet" but Daddy frequently said "shut up", so I thought it was like smoking or driving a car and that you had to be a certain age to be allowed.

After that the grown-ups' language improved for quite a long time.

I find it sad that people apparently no longer can complain about anything without using coarse or obscene language and hope I live long enough to experience a move back to the idea that swearing is impolite and unnecessary.

grannybuy Wed 27-Jun-18 16:09:33

It is normal for some families. My DD told me yesterday that when she was in the park, a mother shouted at a young child, 'you f...ing wanted to come here, so go and f...ing play!'

breeze Wed 27-Jun-18 15:58:00

Years ago, driving my 3 sons back from school (they were around 12, 14, 16) a van pulled out and nearly killed us all. I shouted 'You f..king ......(pause) Nincompoop'! (the next word on the tip of my tongue would've been unacceptable!). There was a stunned silence, followed by laughter, followed by 'Nincompoop? What the hell does that mean'! I've been a laughing stock ever since (they still laugh about it). Still glad I didn't use the other word though!

lucygran Wed 27-Jun-18 15:53:10

Nezumi65 My DGC is 11.

I don't suppose it's the first time he's heard swearing, but I feel when it comes from parents it somehow makes it more acceptable in the child's eyes.