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AIBU

Siblings using the same spoon and cup at the same time

(58 Posts)
Gigi27 Fri 23-Jul-21 18:08:43

My daughter lets her two daughters eat and drink from the same cup and cutlery at the same time. I suggested to her that it would be better if they had their own for each meal. My daughter replies by saying it’s only family germs,but they seem to pass colds and sniffles to each other!
Does anyone have any suggestions how I can make her see my concerns, or is this the way they parent these days?

Tea3 Fri 23-Jul-21 18:11:41

How strange! Apart from the hygiene aspect, children need to learn how to conduct themselves when eating with others.

BlueBelle Fri 23-Jul-21 18:13:09

How very strange is she trying to cut down on the washing up I wouldn’t worry about germs but are they Siamese twins if not they need ( in my opinion) to be treated as two separate children and each have their own equipment What about when they eat out or at a friends house
Unfortunately if that’s the way they want to do it not much you should or could do about it

tanith Fri 23-Jul-21 18:13:47

I honestly don’t think it matters. They’ll catch things from each other anyway is it really worth causing a argument?

March Fri 23-Jul-21 18:13:59

I don't think you can, its her way and that's how she chooses to parent.
Maybe they eat better like that?

Mollygo Fri 23-Jul-21 18:19:40

Sounds weird to me, but that’s her style of parenting and I wouldn’t comment. I’ve no idea how old they are but if they are old enough for you to take them out for a meal it would be interesting to see what happens.

Cold Fri 23-Jul-21 18:28:12

How old are they?

I don't think it matters too much if they are pre-school age

Gigi27 Fri 23-Jul-21 18:28:15

They are 3years and 1 year.

nanaK54 Fri 23-Jul-21 18:36:52

Quite odd in my humble opinion, but I wouldn't say a word, her children her choice

Esspee Fri 23-Jul-21 18:36:57

Please zip your lips. You've already voiced your opinion, anything further will only cause trouble.

Kim19 Fri 23-Jul-21 18:37:12

And if they both want to drink at the same time?

cornishpatsy Fri 23-Jul-21 18:37:54

As the children like doing it I do not see a problem. Some children refuse to use cutlery at all. They will grow out of it.

Pick your battles, in the nicest way this is nothing to do with you.

ElaineI Fri 23-Jul-21 18:38:46

They are still very young. Up to your daughter really. Maybe they eat better like that.

Summerlove Fri 23-Jul-21 18:45:40

Interesting
In my extended family it’s almost always beenthe older generations trying to have the grandkids share their cutlery vs getting them their own.
It’s never made sense

BlueBelle Fri 23-Jul-21 18:46:19

At 1 year old the little one is still probably more a finger girl and perhaps this is the mums way of teaching and encouraging her to be a big girl and use a spoon and fork or knife and fork like her big sister
I didn’t envisage them being so young
I wouldn’t worry at all they ll soon verbalise they want their own when they see others having theirs

Maybe when they are older (they are still very young) you can buy them a set each with their name on or something like that but definitely you ve said enough and it’s really not your business

DiscoDancer1975 Fri 23-Jul-21 18:50:55

The germs will pass on whatever you do. Just being in the same room. It’s just odd. Do they share everything else? When would you stop it? Perhaps when they ask for their own.

As with everything else, unless it’s life threatening, don’t get involved. It’s not worth it. However, if you go round for a meal, say you want your own cutlery...and plate....and cup....

Gigi27 Fri 23-Jul-21 18:51:27

Thanks everyone for your comments.
I think bite my lip is the answer to this one!

Bluebellwould Fri 23-Jul-21 19:12:16

It’s not the hygiene that worries me but how can you tell who is eating what and in what quantity. Is the little one getting enough or is the older one eating her portion too? I would ask that at least, but in a nice way.

Luckygirl Fri 23-Jul-21 19:14:36

how I can make her see my concerns? You can't so don't even try. Her children, her rules. Simply not worth risking a fall out over something so trivial!

maddyone Fri 23-Jul-21 19:32:04

My daughter did this with her twin babies. Why not for such young children? But she gave them their own cutlery from around twelve months old, plus lots of finger foods.

Doodledog Fri 23-Jul-21 19:45:55

How does it work? Are there dishes on the table with a spoon or fork in each one? Or all the food out with just one set of cutlery and it's every child for themselves?

Either way, I would leave your daughter to it. In the grand scheme of things it's not important, and she might resent your comments.

Newmom101 Fri 23-Jul-21 21:04:27

I have children the same age. I give them their own cutlery and cups but inevitably they end up swapping a sharing throughout anyway.

With snacks I’ve given up and just place it on one plate and they share. They’ll even swap ice lollies once half eaten. They’re siblings and close in age, they’ll get each other’s germs anyway

Callistemon Fri 23-Jul-21 21:06:02

Fingers were invented before forks.

Grannybags Fri 23-Jul-21 21:23:30

Callistemon

Fingers were invented before forks.

That's one of my Mum's sayings and very true!

Callistemon Fri 23-Jul-21 21:31:40

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