I'm with you on this one, Expatmaggie. Sound advice! I had 4 children - 2 girls who both did the most they could - illustrations to essays, full pages, the works. One son did half a page if that's what was asked for, no more and no less. He needed 5 passes to get to do the course he wanted, and that's all he got, but he passed his college course with flying colours, doing greenkeeping and exactly what he wanted to do. 1 girl and 1 boy graduated from uni. 1 from college, and my other daughter went to Uni and did a couple of years but decided it wasn't for her. Very proud of them all, but at the end of the day they all got to do what they wanted in life, and have never been out of work, working as teenagers, Saturday jobs, vacation jobs, and now fully employed in interesting jobs. The exams and homework are a means to an end - they know their own level and no amount of nagging will produce anything more than they are prepared to give. Just support them all the way, be a shoulder to cry on in tough times, console and encourage them if they need to do resits, but praise well at the end - and not just the blessed A-stars! ALL passes count, and nobody every remembers what GCSE or A level grades you get! Just as long as they continue to get on to the next stage of their education/life. I suppose it is a different matter if they are deliberately bunking off school/college or have got into the wrong crowd, you probably need to be more forthright with your opinion - but will they listen at that point? Hey ho...!