Is she imagining it

Sis just called they are off on holday next week to France AHHHH obviously sorted things out. I am spring cleaning next week so a bit of a difference!!!

cheelu the only advise I can give is find a rich man and be very nice to him

true, very true NfkDumping but the problem is she does not know what the problem is at all so this is why between us we can not find a solution..

If he's stressed over his business and feeling low the last thing he will want is a wife worrying about where their relationship is going.

that is so sad though and a waist of two peoples lives, don't you think

Probably doesn't want to make waves at this time of life.

But j05 this is the bit I don't understand,,why does he not just say if he is fed up with her..

Ah harrigran 50 years that's brilliant I think I have done very well at 30 years, your understanding ways have obviously been a factor but do you have any other advise for a long and happy marriage.

I think he could be depressed, as others have said. Depression can make you draw into yourself. Or, I think wanting to be on your own more can be part of growing older.

Or he could be just fed up with things in general, including her. It happens.

No cheelu I am never lonely, he is a treasure in other ways. Since retiring he has taken over the cooking as long as I tell what we are going to eat and he does all the ironing too. I have a bookcase of books I want to read and I have my computer, after 50 years together I think we just don't need to talk all the time. Mind if he leaves the room with his mobile in his hand I am one step behind him and earwigging.

Emm maybe that's all it is then, but still a bit hurtful I know she gets quite lonely sometimes because she has said as much, do you feel that sometimes harrgran..

Harri

Oh dear that sounds rather like DH and me. I walk into the lounge, he goes upstairs. I go up to the study where he is sitting and he goes to the lounge. I ask if he has a problem with me in the same room and he says no point in wasting time if the telly is free for watching footie or whatever.

It is a new film with maggie Smith and other good actors. It is directed by Dustin Hoffmann and is about retired singers living in an Old people's home together.

Just looked it up it looks brilliant--might watch it myself, I love Pauline Collins

sorry for my ignorance but what is Quartet--NfqDumpling stop laughing this instance ha ha

Perhaps they could see Quartet?

Sounds like he's stressed about his business perhaps? If so she's going to have to be very understanding for a while. Going to the pictures sounds like an excellent idea.

Perhaps they need to do something together .Go to the pictures so they can talk about that!

No he does not hang up the phone or do anything suspicions as I have asked her that but she has just text me to say that he told her he doesn't really want to talk as it leads to arguments!

I fear nanaej is right. But there could be several reasons for his actions - depression, mid life crisis, boredom, flirtation. Does he hang up the phone when she comes into the room? Work late at the office? Perhaps there's something she could do to pep up their relationship?

Ah! maybe it is all going pear shaped and he is avoiding talking about it. if his head is full of problems re work he might need time to think it through. How sudden is the change? Did they usually chat about work and solve problems together?

He is very stressed right now with his new business but why would he avoid spending time with her though

DH & I often share space but with me on GN and he on his footie forum so not communicating! Such as now!

However we are both busy people and off doing our own thing but do spend time doing things together ..including crosswords, jigsaws, film, theatre, eating(in & out) sharing articles in the press, socialising with friends etc etc.

I suppose the problem on this thread is that it appears a deliberate action by cheerlus BiL. Either he wants a confrontation but does not know how to manage it or is trying to manipulate it so it becomes wife's issue. Either way my advice is that she takes control of the situation and makes a decision that suits her.

oh gosh sounds like me and OH TODAY - he decorating me cooking/ironing ships that pass in the night!

maybe they not got enough separate things to do? just and an idea, seems bit strange must admit.