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What the worse thing you ever lost

(40 Posts)
cathy Mon 29-Apr-13 00:18:19

My wedding video, my DH was clearing out a cluttered cupboard we had and gave all our videos to a charity shop not realising our wedding video was among them!! I did not realise til some time after, for years I was upset about it but I have let it go now.

HUNTERF Mon 29-Apr-13 07:32:11

We had a burglary and my wife's engagement ring was stolen.
I was glad she was more concerned about the dog we had at the time.
The thieves locked him in a cupboard. He did bark when he heard us so he was easy to find.
The neighbours said they did hear some barking earlier so it appears the dog did his job.


Greatnan Mon 29-Apr-13 08:29:18

Cathy, snap - not my wedding but one of my daughter's weddings. I had rather a lot of champagne (well, I had paid for it) and in those pre-digital days I had taken the film out of my camera and somehow lost it.
I have also recorded over some precious video films which I had had made from our old 16 mm cine films.
I lost one of a lovely pair of earrings that my daughter bought for me with her first week's wages. It dropped in my bedroom and I searched the carpet with finger tips and I will never understand where it went.

MiceElf Mon 29-Apr-13 08:32:34

My temper!

annodomini Mon 29-Apr-13 08:56:42

My grandmother's wedding ring. It was rather loose on my finger and when shook my hand to warm it up, the ring shot off down a gap beside the handbrake of my (then) old banger, a Vauxhall Chevette and no matter how much I searched in and under the car, I never found it, but I still have my other granny's engagement ring.

absent Mon 29-Apr-13 09:02:37

The trick for finding a missing earring is to cover the end of the vacuum cleaner hose with a some fine fabric, such as a piece of muslin or old tights, and vacuum the whole floor until the earring is sucked up but can't disappear into the vacuum cleaner. I imagine this would work for anything small and light.

Bags Mon 29-Apr-13 09:05:02

I can't remember losing anything so important that I couldn't get over it fairly quickly. A horse ate my wedding ring a few months after I got married. I decided I wasn't really a ring person. DH1 refused to wear a ring anyhow. I guess he wasn't a ring person either. DH2 wears a wedding ring and I don't, though I do have one somewhere.

I do remember getting in a right tizzy in my teens about something I couldn't find. Afterwards, I decided I didn't ever want to feel like that again, and I haven't. That's not to say I haven't lost things and been irritated about it, but once I start feeling the irritation but cannot think of anywhere else to search, or cannot recover the item for some other reason, I shrug and move on.

On the whole, I don't think I get emotionally attached to objects for sentimental reasons. Useful things, or recreational things that I use a lot, I'd be annoyed about losing, but only until the annoyance annoyed me more than the loss! Then I'd 'tell' the annoyance to get lost, so to speak.

MiceElf Mon 29-Apr-13 09:08:38

But what about not 'things' but real irreplaceables? I once lost 20,000 words because I hadn't backed it up.

It still stresses me when I think about it.

Bags Mon 29-Apr-13 09:11:02

Yes, that's very annoying, but once you've accepted that it/they are irrecoverable, you just have to go back to square one and start again, or else metaphorically jump over the hole that has just formed in front of you. That's how I think of it anyway. I can't be arsed with staying stressed about something I can do nothing to change. Seems like a waste of energy smile

baubles Mon 29-Apr-13 09:12:30

MiceElf grin

A few years ago on my return from a holiday in Tunisia I, at the last minute, checked in a bag which I'd intended carrying on with me so it wasn't locked.
In it was a ring given to me by my husband in the early days of our marriage and also a pair of earrings given to me by my mother.

You can probably guess the outcome - weeks later I opened the little pouch only to find it empty. Neither item was particularly valuable but the ring meant a lot to me. sad

baubles Mon 29-Apr-13 09:14:13

Oddly the lost ring meant more to me than my wedding ring, which I lost years ago on a beach.

Greatnan Mon 29-Apr-13 09:16:02

Like you, Bags, I attach little importance to things. My sister had put her passport (somewhere safe) and when I went over to bring her back to France for a holiday, we turned her house upside down, and eventually it turned up in a old suitcase which she swore she hadn't opened in years. Hm.....she loses things all the time or has them stolen.
I find the best thing to do with important documents is to file them at once in a folder, clearly marked, in case of my death, and put it in a plastic crate. I don't have any jewellery now, having given it all to my daughters, except one ring which I wear all the time.
I did once leave my credit card in a cash machine in Egypt but somebody took it into the bank for me so I was able to get it back on production of my passport.
I think if anybody broke into my flat to steal, they might end up leaving me something instead. I have moved seven times in the last ten years, mainly to furnished rental properties in France, so my possessions have dwindled.

Bags Mon 29-Apr-13 09:17:56

An example of something I lost and simply had to "get over" because there is nothing I can do about it, is my relationship with my eldest brother. We grew up together. He is only thirteen months older than me. He asked me to make his wife's wedding dress, which I did, including making all the lace for it.

But it became apparent when they'd been married for about five years that visits from his siblings were not welcome. These would only have been few and far apart because we are a spread out family, but not even dropping in for a cup of tead when travelling near where they lived was encouraged. Well, it was positively discouraged.

That hurt, but eventually I gave up trying and I've tucked away the regret about it in a very small secure box. I'm not sure it's even regret any more – more an acceptance that I'll never understand whatever the problem is, but whatever it is, it's not my problem.

Greatnan Mon 29-Apr-13 09:24:36

Bags, substitute 'daughter and her children' for 'brother' and you have my exact situation. And I, too, have managed to put the hurt in a box and get on with my life.

MiceElf Mon 29-Apr-13 09:29:57

Yes, they are wise words, and I did 'get over it' because I had to. But that first initial feeling when you remember the experience is always there, even if you have come to terms with it.

Lost relationships are a million times more devastating than things or words, but if there's nothing to be done about it the wise and sensible response is, as you both say, put it in a box.'

Elegran Mon 29-Apr-13 09:30:11

A little pendant that ny grandmother gave me when I was in my early teens. It had belonged to her mother. Not much financial value, just sentimental.

Going out some ten years later, I was in two minds about whether to wear that or a fresh flower. I decided to make up my mind in the car, and put the pendant in a handbag in the glove compartment and the flower on top of it. We stopped off on the way for a quick drink, came back and found the quarterlight window forced, the bag gone and the flower discarded on the floor. Yes, I know I should not have left the handbag, but this was a spur-of-the-moment decision and I forgot it was there.

Flowerofthewest Mon 29-Apr-13 10:31:35

I was 19 and went into Cambridge to purchase a going away outfit for my wedding day. I couldn't find anything so went to a phone box to phone the dressmaker who was making my wedding dress if she could run up something else. She said sorry but no, didn't have the time. I was so disappointed that I left my purse with £200 in the phone box. Realised a little while later and, of course, it was gone. I dreaded going home to my parents who had given me the money (they were not well off) Mum was cross and said 'I hope they broke their leg running away' ???? Dad said - Don't worry, its only money, we will give you some more.' Bless him.

The purse was special too as dad had brought it back from one of his business trips.

Oh and I lost my wedding ring from DH no2 (present) 5 years later my DDS no3 fount it under a bush in the garden. I remembered that the day I had lost it I had been scrabbling around trying to catch our rabbit. THAT was a happy ending.

tanith Mon 29-Apr-13 10:54:57

I borrowed a video taken at my Mums 80th birthday from my sister and although I was sure I gave it back its not been seen since, both sisters and brother blame me I'm sure, as it was the only video of our Mum and she died less than a year later... I was very sad but to this day I still think I gave it back but its never been found.

Grannyeggs Mon 29-Apr-13 11:22:42

All the family photos of the children, in a flood. You never get that back, all the negatives were with them.

Zengran Mon 29-Apr-13 11:23:55

Grannyeggs sad

Greatnan Mon 29-Apr-13 12:01:08

That is very sad, Grannyeggs. Thank goodness for digital cameras - all my photos are now stored for me by Picasa.

Hunt Mon 29-Apr-13 12:36:46

The family allowance which I left in a telephone box. 50 years ago but I still recall the ''sinking stomach'' feeling when I realised what I had done.

cathy Mon 29-Apr-13 14:52:17

good advise Bags Greatnan oh the earings your daughter bought with her first wage packet, If I had a daughter that lovely that would buy ME something with her first wage packet I would be a very happy mesmile You are a very lucky lady, but then you put the work in so you more than deserve it.

cathy Mon 29-Apr-13 14:53:47

I think I have learnt from this post that it DOES happen and not just to me and I should get over itsmile thank you

ninathenana Mon 29-Apr-13 15:06:42

When I was about 9 I lost my Cinderella watch on the beach whilst swimming. It wasn't so much the watch that bothered me. It was telling mum !

More importantly I had my jewellery box stollen in a burglary. Which contained my dad's wedding ring and a locket I received when I was bridesmaid for my older sister. The box it's self was the first present DH ever bought me