Unhappy starting school

I think local authorities do check that home schooled children are being educated decently.

why should one size fit all?

I wasn't thinking of children recently moved to the area. Of course they have to be found places for. At whichever school can accommodate them.

SusieB50 how awful for you. I always felt so sorry for the mums whose children cried when leaving mum when I was teaching. The child usually settled but I knew the mum would be worried all day. I am a bit concerned about the relationship that the school seems to have with the parents. I would hope that any good school would have ways of dealing with distressed children and would help your GD when she won't leave mum. I think your DD should go into the school and express her concerns and ask for help from all the staff.It may be that a kind word occasionally is all GD needs. I am not sure if any school has the right to ban children from going home at lunch time, but I may be wrong.

It's about time home schooling was Ofsteded then!

Why would an oversubscribed school take in a child at seven or eight?

Why wouldn't they?

They do.

Just because a school is over subscribed in reception doesn't mean that they don't have people move areas in later years.. it's quite normal for a few kids to leave per year even in over subscribed schools, parent's split up, have to move house, have to move job, chose to move area etc etc.

The law states that they have to recieve an education, not schooling, and that education can be reading harry potter or building dens in a forest with friends, it doesn't have to in any way resemble "school"

It's an option.

It's an option that not everyone knows about, so it's worth putting on the table

Meanwhile, not everyone knows this either, you can continue to use your early years funding even if your kid would have been in reception right up to 5

Why would an oversubscribed school take in a child at seven or eight?

Do you mean home educting as the alternative? That's not an easy option for the average mum. The law says education must start the term after the child turns five.

Only if you want an immediate start, then you have to take a council allocated space, but if you don't have to do that, you can go on the waiting list for a space at your prefered school. It may take some time but you don't have to go into the system unless you suddenly decide "right we want back in RIGHT NOW" .

If you're taking time off for a child who wasn't ready at 4/5, but is ready at 6/7/8, another few months to wait list the prefered school isn't going to be a problem.

Getting the school of choice is extremely difficult. You have to go along with the system. Sadly.

TYrouble is notanan, if the parents don't take the place when it is offered, the child is likely to lose his/her place at the school of choice. It seems very unfair.

There's lots of options, deferred reception start, or post reception applications.. or not going at all.

I was just putting the options out there because some people do not realise that school is NOT compulsary at 5, and then have the heartbreak of forcing a square peg in a round hole.

Many kids do settle, but for those that don't, there are other options you don't need to force it.

Yes, I bet you do. Hope things improve for him soon.

Thanks Jings He sees the child psychologist regularly as well as speech therapist (stutters a lot when stressed) and OT at school and home. I wish I had a magic wand to help him and his parents ...

Sorry rosesarered. I hadn't read your post, or much of the thread at all. It was Swanny's post that caught my eye.

Obviously, any child that may be on the autistic spectrum is going to have a great deal of trouble fitting in ( even if possible.)
My post was about neuro typical children only, not about children who may have to be in a special school/unit/ home schooled.

My own DS's birthday is before Christmas. He started nursery at 4 and was geared to starting school in the September before his 5th birthday. However, we had to move area in that summer and he wasn't accepted at the new school till January. Those four months were very difficult for him and he seemed to be held back throughout his school years.

TYrouble is notanan, if the parents don't take the place when it is offered, the child is likely to lose his/her place at the school of choice. It seems very unfair.

That is awful Swanny. He needs some help. Could his mum and dad perhaps try to get him seen by a child psychologist? Perhaps through the GP. Poor little boy.

My DGS's birthday is early in the school year. All day at nursery was too much for him so he he did 3 half-days each week. His first year at 'big school' - in Reception - he coped extremely well. Second year - Y1 - started off ok-ish but he was unable to cope in mainstream and spent Jan-July with the autistic unit. (He had already been diagnosed as on the spectrum and currently has a development age of 3.) This year he is really struggling to settle back to going to school in the special unit. He doesn't want to get up, have breakfast and get dressed during the week; covers his ears and makes noise to drown anything that is said about Monday to Fridays; and seeks constant reassurance when it's the weekend that he doesn't have to go to school. So stressful for him and his parents

Very true notanan. Some children don't settle after the first few weeks, or after the first term, or in fact ever. Some children are not suited to school, or should I say some schools are not suited to children. I wish I had recognised that much earlier than I did and saved my son and us a great deal of anguish.

If they are kept from school until aged 5, friendships will already have been made and ultimately the school experience as a whole would be harder for them to integrate into.

for those who don't settle/aren't ready.. those friendship groups get formed without them anyway even if they're there..

DGS isn't happy as yet, but it has to be said that DS ( his Dad) had to be carried (aged 5) kicking and screaming into school for the first 2 weeks.It happens, with some children.

Our DGS started the other week at school (aged 4) but it is much the same as nursery, just for a longer day, that's all.They will be with friends from nursery, and though tiring at first, will soon become used to it.If they are kept from school until aged 5, friendships will already have been made and ultimately the school experience as a whole would be harder for them to integrate into.

Just incase you're not aware, school is not compulsary in England. At all, not at 4, not the term they turn 5, you can opt in and out as you wish (although if you join after reception there may be wait lists)

Some kids don't settle, and it's sad that some parents think there's no option but to stick with it

That said, it's very early in the term, I'm just putting this out there incase it doesn't resolve. She can be taken out of school and sent again (or not) when she wants to go.

I remember when my youngest started he was shattered. I used to take my bike down and push him home on it as a pushchair doesn't look.cool for school. He soon coped.

Sometimes these phased starts in reception go on until half term which is mad for anyone who's parents work and often if they have been to nursery. Amazing how quickly they adjust and grow into the role. By Christmas they are all.well.settled..