Gransnet forums

Ask a gran

What would you do.

(46 Posts)
Bopeep14 Wed 22-May-19 17:57:12

I have been having a bit of trouble with a neighbour lately which i have been ignoring, but tonight as my son was leaving after picking up his child she was just going out with her male friend they started shouting and swearing at my son and me, calling me names etc. It took me all my time to stop my son from retaliating, we just carried on walking to the car and ignored them, this is what i need advice for as we walked past them they both smelt very strongly of something my son said it was cannabis i have no idea what it smells like, my daughter has also told me she has smelt it while walking past the house when she has the windows open. They both got into his car and drove off. If my children are correct he or possibly both of them are driving under the influence of drugs. Would you report them is it actually illegal to smoke cannabis in your own home? Advice please.

Esspee Sat 25-May-19 07:33:15

One of the problems about internet sites like these is that people contribute without actually knowing anything about the subject. Of course using marijuana is illegal whether in your own home or outside and of course driving under the influence is illegal. Report it to the police.
Finding the owner of the property is straightforward. Write to them.
Don't let these people bully you.
Good luck.

Starlady Sat 25-May-19 03:12:48

Ugh! So sorry you have to deal w/ this, Bopeep! I imagine the cannabis is making your neighbor and her male friend act this way. Or they have mental health issues that they are trying to ease w/ cannabis but to no avail. (NOT saying that all people w/ mental illness behave this way.)

IMO, they've already gotten "nasty," so I don't see what you could lose by reporting whatever you can provide evidence of. But if you're afraid they'll do something even worse, then I understand if you just document for now and avoid any action. And, of course, I respect your decision, regardless.

Hope this is all resolved soon!

EmilyHarburn Fri 24-May-19 10:41:20

For information about driving under the influence stat at the government website
www.gov.uk/drug-driving-law

harrigran Fri 24-May-19 08:26:10

You don't need to know who the landlord is, we had neighbours with drug problems and the police sorted it. Police interviewed tenants and landlord who would have lost his licence if he hadn't evicted the problem tenants.

Saggi Fri 24-May-19 07:08:57

I have a friend who has been putting up with this sort of terrible behaviour for 4 long years....no amount of complaining to the council....the police....the environmental officer.... her local councillor... her doctor ( as she’s not allowed to sleep at night)...has done her any good. She has made mountains of diary notes...officially recorded, with a council device all the excessive noise this next door neighbour puts her through to ALL the said agencies , but all to no avail. We think the reason is because her elderly neighbour causing the problem, is older than her...and they don’t want to seem to be discriminating against the ‘troublemaker’. My friend has now resorted to travelling around on buses all day , winter and summer, to get some respite from this aged woman next door , who even her relatives, when told of the problem she’s causing in the neighbourhood, ignore! My friends health has deteriorated in consequence of this neighbours bad behaviour....all the council can offer us for her to move away , although of course they can’t offer her a placement. When my friend suggested they remove the neighbour causing the problem they said that wasn’t within their remit. So as usual in this country , the victim has no choice but to put up or shut up! You will get no help from these agencies...they’re toothless in the face of political correctness!

moggie57 Thu 23-May-19 22:56:07

ignore them .you never know whether they will get nasty.if it getsreally bad report them to local authority.

Eloethan Thu 23-May-19 22:54:30

I would try to ignore it and hope they eventually lose interest. However, as others have said, keep a careful note of all these incidents (and recording on a mobile phone sounds like a good idea too). If the problem gets worse, then I think you need to consult a solicitor with the evidence you have collected.

It sounds like they may have mental health issues, perhaps exacerbated by drug use.

cas58 Thu 23-May-19 20:40:17

Far North is correct. It IS Illegal. We have this issue with our neighbour right now. I would note down everything and go to the council too for unreasonable behaviour.
After a while it's going to get hard to ignore and for now she's just yelling, what if she get violent?
You could try talking to her maybe first thing in the morning when you can hop she isn't high.

4allweknow Thu 23-May-19 20:35:58

Her actions may all well be down to canabis and goodness knows what else she and boyfriend may be consuming. Definitely a word with community police officer.

NotSpaghetti Thu 23-May-19 18:57:28

We had terrible neighbours once and eventually had to resort to the council. After weeks of logging the noise they brought a recording device and checked the decibels.
After we reported them things did get 10 times worse. I’m not sure what I would recommend now as if made for months of dread and sleepless nights before it was resolved by the husband being arrested and jailed for other offences and the wife moving away with the children.
We then had our car “trashed” in the drive the day he was released. It may have been a coincidence....

NotSpaghetti Thu 23-May-19 18:51:52

grandtanteJE65 - the belief is that the grandchild’s mother regularly bumps their car whilst parking.
That was the start of the problem according to Bopeep14

Exmouthlady Thu 23-May-19 18:47:04

Just go to the land registry and download the register for the property. It'll give the owners name and address. Costs about £3.00 and should be available as an instant download. This information is legally available to anyone for any property.

Hattiehelga Thu 23-May-19 17:18:10

Definitely report this. You could be saving a life if they are driving under the influence of drugs and have an accident that is no fault of the other driver.

AliBeeee Thu 23-May-19 15:31:05

You maybe able to find out who the landlord is through the landlord registration website. All landlords in Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and some parts of England must be registered. This is the Scottish register.
www.ros.gov.uk/our-registers/scottish-landlord-register
My son and dil got in touch with the landlord when the tenants next door were causing problems and the landlord dealt with it immediately.
Good luck.

minxie Thu 23-May-19 14:02:19

Report to the council and they will send you a log book to record every single incident.

grandtanteJE65 Thu 23-May-19 13:16:03

On 2nd March 2015, the law changed so that it is now an offence not only for you to smoke cannabis and drive whilst impaired, but also whilst the active constituent of cannabis (delta-9-tetrahydrocannibinol) is above the prescribed limit of 2 µg per 1 litre of blood.

I found this on www.motordefencelawyers.co.uk

So yes, if you believe that your neighbours are driving while under the influence of cannabis, you could report them to the police.

I believe you also can report people for using abusive language to you or your family, especially as you don't seem to have been in an argument with them or given them cause to lose their tempers with you.

Reporting them is not likely to improve your relationship with your neighbours though, but in your place I would consider reporting the unprovoked abusive language, as your grandchild was present at the time.

Before doing so, however, it might be worth while to ask your neighbours when they are sober what you had done to provoke them, as neither you nor your son could think of a good reason for the abuse they subjected you to, and say that it upset you that a child had to hear this kind of language.

Pat1949 Thu 23-May-19 12:58:51

Yes, Bopeep14, it is illegal to be in possession of cannabis in the UK, I don't know why anyone would think otherwise.

MysticalUnicorn Thu 23-May-19 11:52:21

Have you tried going round there and talking to her to see if she has a problem or needs help? This would be the best first move, preferably when you can't smell the cannabis. It might be a problem which can be easily sorted, especially if you have been on good terms previously.

Sheilasue Thu 23-May-19 11:46:28

Get some advice from the citizen advice or if you are brave enough speak to the police. Don’t be frightened of them, and don’t get in arguments with them.
I have plenty of bad neighbours over the years and my way of dealing with them is to ignore them, unless they start throwing things over your garden or are threatening you.

Bopeep14 Thu 23-May-19 11:05:47

Thanks all for your advice she is at it again while i am typing this??‍♀️ I am keeping a log of everything, i am at the moment just going to ignore it. I did a bit of research and have found it is illegal to smoke cannabis in your home and drive with it in your system. The house she lives in is private rented and no i have no idea who the landlord is unfortunately.

Fee47 Thu 23-May-19 10:45:53

But just be careful cause you have to live next door and if they find out who's reported it could turn nasty step with caution ad say

Fee47 Thu 23-May-19 10:44:03

Could be growing it !! ?

Hm999 Thu 23-May-19 10:37:46

Is the house next door rented? If so, do you know who the landlord is?

humptydumpty Thu 23-May-19 10:23:10

I agree with narrowboatman, keep a record over say a month and then go to the landlord if rented.

narrowboatnan Thu 23-May-19 10:19:28

If your neighbour is in a rented house you could try speaking to her landlord.