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Going away

(90 Posts)
etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 11:34:58

My dD and partner are going for a weekend without their dd. I'm having her for 1 night other gran is having her second night to be diplomatic. I know she will cry for her mum. I never left my dd. Does anyone think this is ok.

GrandmaKT Tue 09-Jul-19 11:37:36

How old is she?

etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 11:46:58

She is just 6.

sodapop Tue 09-Jul-19 11:52:50

You are worrying too much ethelbags1 your granddaughter will enjoy time with you if you just relax. I had all my grandchildren without parents from a much earlier age. It's good for children to have a little independence from their parents and time for you both to enjoy each other's company. Don't over think this.

Luckygirl Tue 09-Jul-19 11:54:36

Can't see the problem - just enjoy!

etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 11:55:54

I'm a compulsive worrier. They need a break . Im too old fashioned. I've planned all sorts of stuff for us to do, housework can wait it will be a fun weekend. I just hope she doesn't cry for her mum.

Fennel Tue 09-Jul-19 12:05:04

As others say, just enjoy it. I was going to say plan some activites but you've already done that.
If you think she might cry for her Mum (I don't think she will) get out some old photos of her Mum as a little girl. At 6 she's ready for a break, and a first step on the way to independence.

M0nica Tue 09-Jul-19 12:05:12

She may do if something goes wrong, but it will pass.

DGD made her first stay with us at about that age - heading for 7. We went swimming the first morning and we said we would buy her a drink in the cafe afterwards. But it was such fun in the water we stayed in the poolmuch longer than planned and the cafe had closed when we got out. There followed a major collapse and cries of 'I want to go home, I want my mummy etc. '.

However we had planned lunch out and by the time we had got to the pub, she had a soft drink and was busy studying the menu for what she wanted to eat (she loves her food), all was forgotten and everything went well for the rest of her three day stay.

So if she does get upset about anything and ask for her parents, just soldier on. It will soon stop once, something else nice is proposed.

Grannyknot Tue 09-Jul-19 12:09:53

ethelbags a six year old is a bundle of fun. I look after my 5 year old grandson sometimes for a whole day, he is very attached to his mother. When he asks for her (he doesn't cry though) I just say "She will be back sometime" and then "Let's do X or Y" and he is fine. I have been known to say "Don't ask me again!" which made him laugh.

Enjoy your time together.

wildswan16 Tue 09-Jul-19 12:51:45

It's important for children to get used to being away from mum and dad. You never know when an emergency might arise (e.g. mum's ill or in hospital).

Just don't get her over-excited and have a lovely cuddly time with her.

nanasam Tue 09-Jul-19 13:05:20

We had our GSs stay with us from a very early age (babies even), just so DD and SIL could have a break or date night. GS1 suffered with reflux and cried for the first 9 months so it was good for DD to be able to get some sleep and replenish her batteries. It also helped with our bonding with them, and they've grown up knowing they can come and stay whenever they like. They are 14 and 13 now so have their heads in their Snapchat, Instagram and other apps we have no idea about! I really loved it when they were 6 and 5, grandad would make up stories for them which they remember to this day!

Sara65 Tue 09-Jul-19 13:18:52

She’s certainly old enough for a sleepover with granny.

You haven’t said how often you see her, my local ones have stayed since babies, it’s a home from home. The ones from further away, who I obviously don’t see so often have had the odd wobble, but nothing serious, she’ll love it, and so will you!

Lessismore Tue 09-Jul-19 13:31:40

Distract her with activities, allow for some down time with favourite toys,

Kittye Tue 09-Jul-19 14:41:09

Had two of my grandsons aged 4 & 18 months for a week while their parents went on honeymoon...very tiring for us but the boys were fine. I’m sure a 6 year old will be fine,it will be an adventure for her 😁

BBbevan Tue 09-Jul-19 15:30:45

My 2DDs are now 10 and 13. We have been having them for weekends and more recently weeks since they were tiny. Admittedly they had each other, but we never had any trouble. First time DD2 stayed she sat up in bed and said "I want Mummy and Daddy". We just said she could talk to them in the morning and she went back to sleep. I think the trick is to keep them busy.Then they enjoy themselves and they forget to be sad.
Have a lovely time with your DD ethelbags. We have done cooking,make your own pizza, sewing, knitting, painting, visits to the cinema, zoo, farms, walks in the woods, cutting, sticking. Endless, 'Nanny McFee' etc, etc Just enjoy

ayse Tue 09-Jul-19 15:37:31

Ask your dd about her bedtime routine and follow the same pattern. I’ve found this helps. Also expect that she may take longer to settle than at home and just relax. Favourite toy and even her own pillow could be helpful.

I’ve looked after several of my grandchildren over the years. Lots of cuddles if necessary and have a lovely time. As others have said in other post, these times are precious.

3dognight Tue 09-Jul-19 16:01:23

Enjoy this special time.

Is she going to sleep in your bed, if you are alone in it?
Otherwise you could make her up a little bed in your room.
Mine always stayed from very young and would fall out over who would have the blow up mattress. The bed was not the favourite. She may grizzle at bed time, or during the night, but if you are nearby you can re-assure her.

You will both probably be tired in the morning, but that's life. Have a special breakfast and do something nice and she will forget her tiredness.

At least you have her first, she may be more fractious for the other granny!

You will be shattered, so make sure you have some me time when shes gone!

leyla Tue 09-Jul-19 16:05:12

You will have a great time. She's bound to miss her Mum at some point. Have some ideas ready to distract her from being upset. Enjoy!

Nannarose Tue 09-Jul-19 16:21:02

Photos of her mum as a youngster are a great idea - it makes the connection without labouring it, and can be an excuse for stories about her mum that she can look forward to sharing.
If she says she misses her mum say 'I know...' and then talk about what she will tell mummy or other nanny when she sees them. We always like to make or do something that she can show or talk to mummy about. She is a good age for some simple cooking, and could make some flapjacks or cheese straws to give her parents.

Eloethan Tue 09-Jul-19 16:34:27

I think a weekend is fine. It's good for children to get used to being away from their mum and dad for a short time - I think it makes them more able to adapt to different situations without feeling anxious.

Jane10 Tue 09-Jul-19 16:57:03

We've had our DGSs for sleepovers and longer since they were babies. It's good for them. A little 1:1 time for spoiling and fun is great. Enjoy it.

MawBroonsback Tue 09-Jul-19 17:02:00

They have left it a bit late for the first “sleepover” haven’t they?
I am sure it will be fine but wonder whether the change of granny might be more unsettling.
A few weeks ago my co- granny and I moved into D and SIL’s house for the weekend (Friday midday t Sunday late afternoon ) while Mummy and Daddy had an anniversary weekend away. Easier to do it there so that the boys could still do their football and ballet, and GD her gymnastics. I was happy to drive whoever needed driving while other granny stayed at home with the others. Apparently all 3 children could not wait for what was referred to as “Grannies in Charge” grin It worked extremely well!
My world record granny duty though was back in 2012 when Paw (already not in great health) and I looked after the 2 boys, then aged 2 1/4 and 10 months while their parents went to New York for a long weekend. That was scary! But D2 and her BF came up on the Sunday and the nanny was there on Monday . But Friday and Saturday were long......Still scary because they were so far away. Enjoy!

Fennel Tue 09-Jul-19 18:27:31

Most 6 year olds are easily distracted and can switch from miserable to cheerful very quickly.
There's the occasional stubborn exception though - who will probably turn out to be a leader in the adult world [grin}.

Fennel Tue 09-Jul-19 18:35:18

ps @ Maw - I was called on Granny duty 6 weeks after our first grandson was born in Kuwait in 2002. The Indian nanny had been called away, son and dil had to go back to work .
I was terrified, but we both survived. I think it made a bond. DiL left breast milk to feed him.
I still remember the Muslim calls to prayer 5 times a day, starting at sunrise.
He's a young man of 17 now.

MawBroonsback Tue 09-Jul-19 18:39:20

Fennel 6 weeks is indeed early. My first “duty” was when DGS was 4 months old and SIL wanted to take D away overnight for a spa weekend .
I think it is safe to say I did not sleep a wink that night!

GrandmaKT Tue 09-Jul-19 18:46:13

6 years old? I thought you were going to say 6 months! As others have said, a 6 year old is easily distracted, and it's your job to do it! If she says she's missing her mum, just talk about what a fun time you are having and all you will have to tell mum when she gets back.
Glad to hear all the housework will be set to one side - it's your chance to have a wonderful time. Enjoy x

jura2 Tue 09-Jul-19 18:46:58

what is wrong with leaving a 6 year old with her granny?
Although I do believe changing 'grannies' mid week-end is just too much. One of you have her this time, and the other the next. Draw straws if necessary.

GrandmaKT Tue 09-Jul-19 18:50:36

Yes, I agree with that Jura2 - the OP will just be getting into her stride and the GD will be whisked away!

harrigran Tue 09-Jul-19 18:59:42

I had my GDs for sleepovers from being toddlers, it has never been a problem. Lots of hugs and bedtime stories and a CD player in the bedroom for music or talking books.
A six year old is great company, they are such chatter boxes.

Jane10 Tue 09-Jul-19 20:07:10

I well remember me and DH in the middle of the night trying to get a screaming baby DGS off to sleep. We were pretty desperate but then our wee cat Minnie walked in and stared at him and he cooed happily and went back to sleep. Relief!

etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 20:52:16

She has stayed many times since she was about 4 months. Im worried that when she sees her parents going off without her she will get upset. Normally she knows she can go home if she wants to but this time she cant. Maybe im to much of a worrier.

Lessismore Tue 09-Jul-19 21:05:22

ethel, take it easy because the wee one will pick up on this anxiety. There's no need for a tear stained farewell. Just reassure all is well. Perhaps avoid the parents driving off scenario.
It isn't really such a long time and a 6 year old will have some concept of time.

cornergran Tue 09-Jul-19 21:13:14

Don’t over think it ethelbags, your granddaughter is used to your home, no doubt has toys and ‘stuff’ that is hers at your home. She may notice the difference, my guess is she won’t unless she regularly gets taken home mid way through a sleepover. I also have concerns about the split weekend, but it’s perhaps too late now to suggest a change, maybe with her sleeping at one home for the weekend and joint care in the day. Our elder granddaughter never asked for her parents, the younger one did and although now in double figures sometimes still does usually when she’s expected to cooperate and doesn’t want to hmm. It passes quickly with distraction, reassurance that we love her, clarity about when she will go home, see or speak to her parent. Sometimes simply focusing on the next meal is enough. You know your granddaughter well, understand her needs, you love each other and she is comfortable with you. Trust yourself, all will be well and my guess is she will sleep like a top while you lie awake worrying. Please don’t let anxiety spoil this time together.

Hetty58 Tue 09-Jul-19 22:32:35

Some children stick to their usual routine, others just don't I find. One of my granddaughters gets upset about going to bed (I think it's too 'final') but is happy with a little bed made up on the settee. We can carry her upstairs later.

Another has to have the fairy lights on (along with the landing light) to fall asleep. I get in bed with them to read the bedtime stories and sometimes pretend to fall asleep (often nearly do).

The two year old stays up way beyond her usual bedtime when she's here and I don't bath her as she's a bit nervous of water. If she gets upset a walk in the pushchair calms her down. Her eight year old sister needs outings and lots of running around to use up some of her energy so we take the dog for an extra walk.

My other two granddaughters are fussy eaters so we eat out or they choose their own shopping and they like to watch a film. The teenage grandson just wants to stay in and eat vast amounts. I stay local so I don't get too exhausted as none of them sleeps more than six or seven hours.

janeainsworth Tue 09-Jul-19 22:43:14

ethel your GD will be fine, she’s obviously used to staying with you.
At 6, she’s perfectly capable of understanding ‘Mam and Dad are going away for a little break and they will be back on Monday.’

One word of advice - the first time we looked after our GD while her parents went away, she was absolutely fine - until the parents FaceTimed. So now when we look after GCs, we have a rule that the parents don’t FaceTime us, they wait for us to FaceTime them, which works much better.

Bordersgirl57 Tue 09-Jul-19 22:45:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Humbertbear Wed 10-Jul-19 07:43:16

I left my children quite often. Originally with my parents , if we were going out on a Saturday night, and then we did ‘swaps’ with other families so that I could go on business trips with my husband. My children loved sleeping away and grew up I dependent and healthy. They went on school journeys without being homesick , my DD flew to New York on her own at the age of 8 to visit her auntie (DDs idea) and my son cheerfully lifted a backpack and went round the world in his gap year without me having any involvement in the trip at all. I think a parents job is to encourage their children to be independent. I really worry about my GD who never do sleepovers, not even here, and never leave the house without an adult.

Sara65 Wed 10-Jul-19 07:53:22

When my children were growing up, sleepovers were very popular, most weekends there would be extra children around, or I’d be off to pick mine up from somewhere

I don’t think they happen so frequently now, I don’t know why, my oldest grandson, now 15, stays over with his best friend sometimes, but the younger ones never seem to.

I think things were a lot more casual when mine were children, I used to like those days, an assortment of children, sharing beds, sleeping on floors, camping in the garden, doesn’t seem to happen anymore

Iam64 Wed 10-Jul-19 07:55:30

At six, she'll be absolutely fine. I agree with janeainsworth about avoiding face time.
Our 6 month old and 3 year old grandchildren arrive on Friday afternoon, staying till Sunday afternoon whilst their parents are away. Their mum offered each grannie one child but we agreed let's keep them together (and go to bed early on Sunday). Have a good time Ethel.

Hetty58 Wed 10-Jul-19 08:04:38

Sara65, times really have changed. When my kids were small there were frequent sleepovers while parents went out. We'd turn the living room floor into one huge bed for our four and the kids of another two or three families. So there'd be a dozen kids here and they were always happy in a crowd.

We didn't worry about them camping out in the garden, either, or leaving the back door unlocked all night. We'd never do that now!

crazyH Wed 10-Jul-19 08:07:07

My GC have stayed overnight many, many times. GD used to cry for her mother. One night I gave her, her mother's dressing gown to sleep with. She had her mother's 'smell'. That was all she needed to drift off to sleep. Job done .

Sara65 Wed 10-Jul-19 08:14:22


Happy memories, my children and their friends would spend weeks of the summer holidays sleeping outside with the back door unlocked all night, I can’t see my grandchildren being allowed that kind of freedom!

LullyDully Wed 10-Jul-19 08:17:32

No problem,. just enjoy her company. It should be an adventure for both of you. Just remember the glue, scissors and bits and bobs to keep her busy.

(I remember clearly, staying overnight with my old granny. Wonderful. We went shopping in Acton together and I put my few clothes in her wardrobe, folded up. Just the two of us, so special.)

Granarchist Wed 10-Jul-19 09:38:26

Gosh - I have just had my five month old DGD for the weekend and before that she was with her aunt for 8 days - easy peasy at that age - we had frozen breast milk in abundance and she was a joy. IMHO the earlier you do it the better so that it becomes the norm. You don't want a DGC having to suddenly come in an emergency when they have never had a night away from parents. If you expect her to cry she may well do so - just have a lovely time - make bedtime comfy and follow her routine - supper - bath - story - cuddles - bed. Enjoy it and don't worry!

Aepgirl Wed 10-Jul-19 11:32:49

They obviously want a couple of nights away on their own, and you get the opportunity of having your grand-daughter. Enjoy it.

Jumbo1 Wed 10-Jul-19 11:35:09

I have 4 Grandchildren under 7 and they have all stayed over with me and partner since they were babies.
They love to sleep over ( 2 at a time!)
and we all love it. I plan the events so that they are busy busy during the day
and then hopefully are ready to sleep when the time comes. I’m 70 this year and I haven’t had as much fun in years. They light up my life and never worry about being left without Mum and Dad. Start them early and enjoy!
As I’m new to Gransnet - can anyone tell me what all the abbreviations mean? I’m lost

mischief Wed 10-Jul-19 11:40:44

I think you are over-thinking it. My dd and husband have often asked me to babysit while they spend a weekend away. They go away as a family for at least 2 weeks each year but Mum & Dad have been invited to America for 4 days later in the year and I'm going to look after them. They enjoy Granny doing different things with them and I love having them to myself without their parents. Win, win. Yes, the first time we had tears at bedtime but I found reading a story and lots of hugs did the trick. The eldest is now 7 and everything is fine. Go on, enjoy.

4allweknow Wed 10-Jul-19 11:46:23

Only issue I can see may be the one night each arrangement. Can't both GPs agree one of you have her in this occasion and the other another time. Could be quite unsettling swoping about especially if you feel DGD will be upset. Had my GC for much longer at much earlier ages and they seemed to love it.

Mcrc Wed 10-Jul-19 11:48:03

First time at six? Our grandchildren were with us for 30 days at 18 mos. and 3 years because of divorce and son's deployment. She will be okay. You are worrying too much. they cried for their mother and we distracted, hugged and talked about it.

optimist Wed 10-Jul-19 11:49:09

My grandchildren stayed with me overnight often and grew up very independent. My grandaughters friend had never slept away from home until recently and became very distressed.

Mcrc Wed 10-Jul-19 11:49:51

Mischief is spot on. They had so much fun. We were exhausted but it was a special time.

Abuelana Wed 10-Jul-19 11:54:11

Gosh my daughter flew at age 7 from Spain into London to stay with my family.
And my cousins daughter at 7 flew to us from London. We have two very confident young woman... I always say each to their own.

CrazyGrandma2 Wed 10-Jul-19 11:56:35

DGS was six months old first time we had him overnight and we've been doing it regularly ever since. For many years now we have them to sleepover at ours as we find it easier and the parents get a night off and a lie in. The kids love it!

At 6 my DD has been known to have a little cry very occasionally at bedtime but she's soon settled. I just acknowledge her feelings but point out mummy can't come so she'll have to put up with me. That usually elicits a laugh and then it's all forgotten. I'm sure you also have the skills to distract. Enjoy!

Stansgran Wed 10-Jul-19 11:57:33

I agree about face time. The only time I had tears when I was having dgd aged 3 and I had put a good pic of her and her mum in a frame thinking she might like to kiss it good night( it was a2 month stay) big mistake. We had tears over burst balloons or no more ice cream but otherwise ok. She is now 15 and wants to come by herself. I found that when parents were going it helped if we left them rather than they left us i.e. We re off for a cup of tea for grandma. Which cafe shall we go to ? Worked for us as when we came back parents had gone. Doesn't work for every child.

Lessismore Wed 10-Jul-19 11:59:15

I'm sorry old foggie alert, forget Face Time.

knspol Wed 10-Jul-19 12:08:10

Might have been easier for child to stay at one place for both nights, less disruption for her. She could then stay at other GP's on next occasion. Enjoy!

Craftycat Wed 10-Jul-19 12:09:30

Good Grief. I have had all my 6DGC stay for weekends from very early on. Sometimes all 6 together. They are 2 sets of 3.
They love coming & if mum & dad do not have any parties etc. to go to they come anyway.
She will love staying with you. Get her making cakes with you& she'll be back the next weekend too.
Enjoy it.

Minshy Wed 10-Jul-19 12:14:02

Her overnight stay will be over before you know it.
Enjoy.. if she cries for her mum simply reassure her and comfort her.
Have a great time

Kim19 Wed 10-Jul-19 12:20:22

I think it's great for the parents to manage some time away on their own. It's further beneficial in that the GPS can enhance their own personal relationships with the 6 year old. Such an interesting and fun age. Mind you, I find the concept of 'one night each' a bit short and disruptive for the child. Could 'fair play' not be managed by a repeat in the not too distant future? Either way, I hope everyone enjoys the outcome. I just can't get enough of my GCs company. Wonderful!

Hm999 Wed 10-Jul-19 12:20:41

Can you build it up beforehand? Phone or text to find out her favourite DVD; does she like sweet popcorn or salt? Burgers or fish and chips? Can you take me to... cinema/beach/wherever?

TrendyNannie6 Wed 10-Jul-19 12:32:00

I never left my kids either n that was in the seventies eighties but things have changed so much now. I think it’s good to go here there everywhere they need to have some independence and she will love being with you n her other grandparent have fun

GrammaH Wed 10-Jul-19 12:35:20

I think you're worrying unduly ethelbags. I originally thought she'd never been away from her parents before but as you regularly have her, what's the problem? You say she's always known previously she could go home if she wanted to...what?? I'm sure you will both have a wonderful time as you usually do when she's with you. My 6 year old GS has been a regular overnight visitor since he was small, his parents frequently grab a few days away when they get the chance as his dad works abroad a lot. We don't have any problems, he's a treat to have about the house as I'm sure your DGD is

Laurely Wed 10-Jul-19 12:57:15

I left my own DD with my parents for a couple of nights when she was 2. She left her son with us for one night before he was 18 months old. Neither cried for their mothers. Both had good relationships with grandparents, had had what was happening explained to them (I counted out the days on DD's fingers), been told they would enjoy it and that Mummy and Daddy would be back. I think it is sensible for children to learn from an early age that they can be safe and happy with other people as well as their own parents.

EthelJ Wed 10-Jul-19 13:13:58

Keep her busy and distracted and have a lovely time. If there is going to be a difficult time it will be at bedtime. So try and make it as calm and relaxed as possible. Maybe take her to buy some nice bath bombs and maybe a new bedtime story so she can look forward to it. Be confident, matter of fact, tell her it will be a great adventure and that mummy and daddy will be back soon.
Have fun good luck

nanamac77 Wed 10-Jul-19 13:43:25

Whilst I don't wish it on her, if she cries for her parents that will be a really valuable learning experience in one sense. The lesson ill be that she wanted her parents but she managed without them and sure enough as promised, they returned ( no doubt with some little present too). Compare that with a child who is so cosseted and protected that she can't cope with going to Uni becasue she's never had to fend for herself! You don;t want her to become a snowflake!!

olliebeak Wed 10-Jul-19 13:47:33

I've had all 5 of my 7 grandchildren for sleepovers since they were around 2-3wks old. Of the other two, one was born in Isle of Man and the other is my dil's child from a previous relationship. So far they've all survived and I now have great relationships with them. The most recent is now almost 3 and I currently have him on two days each week to help keep exorbitant child-care costs down - but he'll be going to full-time School-based Nursery from September. Whenever, we get the 'I want my Mummy/Daddy' or 'I love my Mummy/Daddy.' phrases, I just reply that I also love them and want them but shall we do something exciting until they come back home. I LOVE to show them photos of various members of the family when they were small ........................ the expression on the face of a 2yr old when you show him a photo of Daddy at that age, is absolutely priceless ;-)! We make sure to take a photo, or video, whenever we spend time together - then 'WhatsApp' it to Mummy/Daddy - and wait for a response back.

granny4hugs Wed 10-Jul-19 14:06:13

I did not leave my daughters when they were young (other than for work). However my daughter and son in law left my grandson with me for two weeks and went on holiday when he was 20 months. Spent the first week potty training him which was INTERESTING - but hilarious viewing you tube vids for tips on potty training boys only to find so called 'experts' training kids who looked like they should be starting uni. Spent the second week having a total ball. Absolutely FANTASTIC. Usually I'll have him for a couple of nights on the trot when I can. Not often enough. There is a granddaughter now and i hope to have them both whenever possible. Paternal gran loves to have them to visit but not over night so no conflict.

Patticake123 Wed 10-Jul-19 14:37:02

Enjoy it. It’s a chance to indulge her. If she’s upset, calmly reassure her where M &D are and when they’re coming back. If need be, read her a bedtime story and then stay in the room with her until she nods off. I know this isn’t what you would have done with your own children but this is your granddaughter and you can do things differently!

Bijou Wed 10-Jul-19 14:39:35

I am going back many years. My six year old niece came to stay. She was perfectly happy until I put her dinner in front of her. She burst into tears. It turned out she didn’t like cabbage. Now at the age of sixty she still remembers that stay and the tent I made for her Cindy doll.

stella1949 Wed 10-Jul-19 14:55:32

I've been having mine overnight since they were about 3. I find that a good routine is the best way - lots of fun during the day, a long bath with lots of toys , and then pajamas and a really long story time. My DH can read to children for hours so that's his job ! They love it. By the time he is finished they are usually asleep.

Saggi Wed 10-Jul-19 15:20:52

Yes she’ll be good after a little cry. I’ve been having my grandkids since they’ve been 6 months old overnight and for weekends . They get used to it and learn to love it as nans are usually more relaxed than parents are. Hey get away with stuff!

Yearoff Wed 10-Jul-19 15:22:19

Do you see DGD regularly? I’ve had all of my grandchildren overnight since they were tiny (6 weeks old in the case if my eldest). My 3rd youngest stays over 3-4 times a month (she’s 20 months) as both her parents work shifts that overlap. I love having them and mostly they are fine. They don’t cry for their parents. I’m sure she will be fine and you will enjoy the special time together.

DotMH1901 Wed 10-Jul-19 15:39:36

My grandson was two weeks old when I first had him to stay overnight - my daughter was shattered and needed a decent night's sleep! Since then I have had all three GC to stay within a few weeks of them being born, and regularly, they stayed over weekends with me many times (bit different now as I live with my daughter and see them all the time!) I think it will be a nice treat for your GD to stay with you and that you will both enjoy it!!

jaylucy Wed 10-Jul-19 15:44:19

Nothing wrong with it at all. My parents had all of their grandchildren to stay - sometimes all 6 at once!
It's a special time between the two of you. Maybe you can have a chat with the other GM to see what she has planned so you don't do the same. At least a meal of their own choice is a must or take her to the movies, on a picnic or do something girly together!

sarahanew Wed 10-Jul-19 15:59:56

It's pretty normal. I've had my granddaughters a few times for my daughter and her partner. It gives them quality time together to keep their relationship alive without the responsibilities of their children. They went away for a week when their eldest was six months and me n the other nanny swapped her back and forth between our work shifts!

Rosina Wed 10-Jul-19 16:08:20

We have our grandchildren to stay regularly - it's usually fairly tiring but delightful. They each have a drawer in the bedroom, space to hang clothes, a little throw each to personalise their beds and favourite teddies who live with us. They enjoy pottering about and doing things in the garden - a picnic goes down very well on an old bedspread - going to our shops and having a drink and a cake in the local department store, visiting some nearby relatives, feeding the ducks, the local park - it is all very simple and calm and they seem to enjoy having a relaxed time. Games in the evening, and we rarely resort to TV. I usually record a few short programmes in case they need to be amused for fifteen minutes. They get our full attention - so easy when they are going home later in the week . It doesn't need to be complicated and expensive when they are's the teenagers who are usually fairly hard to please!

NanaSuzy Wed 10-Jul-19 16:18:24

We love having our dgd for a few nights, it is a real treat for us. She's 3 now, really enjoys her stay with us, and cries when she has to go home! I used to stay with my Grandma and similarly loved it.

BlueBelle Wed 10-Jul-19 16:28:21

Ahh don’t worry Ethel if she cries make her better she won’t cry all night at 6 she’s way old enough to understand they are coming back You and your house are familiar to her so she will be fine I did baby sleep overs with all mine except the two in NZ my biggest one was going for two weeks with a 15 month old while mum and dad had a belated honeymoon in Cuba That was a bit challenging as she was poorly with an ear infection and I had no car so was having to get taxis to doctors but we both survived
Don’t let it worry you too much you ll be absolutely fine

Tedber Wed 10-Jul-19 17:59:11

My initial thought was 6 year olds cry for their mums? But I suppose if she has never been left with anyone at all then she might do?

I have never had the luxury of finding out lol smile But a 6 year old should be easy to comfort with books and songs at bedtime. They should also understand mum and dad have gone out but will be back to pick them up (whenever). Plan a fun day with her and tire her out...park, soft play, zoo whatever is available and appeals to you too.

Don't worry too much and you will enjoy it.

Evie64 Wed 10-Jul-19 18:23:31

At 6 she should be okay staying over for 1 night. Make it a big adventure with lots of treats, she'll love it.

Tedber Wed 10-Jul-19 18:47:17

Sara65 and Hetty Things have certainly not changed in my household! Regular cousins sleep overs with a few friends thrown in the mix! All sleeping in bunks, on floor, head to toe! Maybe it is 'different' in smaller families?

I wouldn't have them sleeping outside though now you say! But sometimes, it isn't the children who is the adults! Just a point and probably going off topic smile

glammagran Wed 10-Jul-19 19:26:02

I too wondered if OP was referring to a 6 month old. We had youngest GD (9 months) last month overnight as parents went to a wedding some distance away and children were not invited. She was way better than I could have imagined. The only time she got upset was at bedtime when she realised Mum and Dad weren’t coming back. But she then slept all night (unlike me who slept for about an hour).
A few years ago we had GS(4) and GD(18 months) for a couple of nights (other GP’s had them too) while parents went to Hong Kong prior to spending 3 years living there. GS was fine and understood perfectly parents would be back but GD was upset and angry at the abandonment.
I’m sure all will be fine - go with the flow.

Longdistancegrnny Wed 10-Jul-19 22:41:33

Just had my nearly 2 year old twin GC for 3 days while their parents took big sister to EuroDisney, all well - they only asked for Mummy if they had a tumble or similar, no problems at bedtime, but they have been staying here for the past two weeks with the family over from Australia. Next week it’s three more days with us with big sister while parents have a short break, we make the best of it as soon they will all be back in Australia, and we won’t see them for several months. Mine all had sleepovers from quite a young age and aunts would come here to look after them while we had short breaks....relax and enjoy her company etheltbags1

harrigran Thu 11-Jul-19 09:30:44

Took big sister on holiday and left two behind 🤔
A little unfair, my parents did that and I have never forgotten.

moggie57 Thu 11-Jul-19 22:09:47

how about asking her.? she is 6 .. you can make it sound like a lot of fun ,so not to scare her. have her parents talked to her about it....what does she think?

Tangerine Thu 11-Jul-19 23:24:01

I think you will find your granddaughter enjoys her sleepovers.

She needs to get used to being separated from Mum in case her mother ever has to go away for work or into hospital.

It's only two nights. I hope you have a wonderful time with your granddaughter.

Peonyrose Sat 13-Jul-19 08:18:59

Ethelbags I had mine from when they were 6 weeks. They are all lovely outgoing teenagers now, but I loved that time with them, now they are a bit too busy and working hard for us now. I love it when they do visit and they often talk of their time they did spend with us, I say us, but now it s just me.

Sara65 Sat 13-Jul-19 08:34:27


Sounds fun! We regularly have all the cousins staying, they had to improvise last weekend because some rooms are being decorated, but they had great fun gathering blankets and throws and pillows from around the house, plus quite a few things that didn’t seem quite necessary, to make a camp.

Sadly, I couldn’t leave them outside now, but they still have fun.

Ethel, you have all this to look forward to!

GreenGran78 Sun 14-Jul-19 23:29:47

I agree that staying a night with one set of GP, then going to the others would be unsettling for her. Much better to stick to one venue for both nights.
Some children fear that Mummy and Daddy won’t be coming back, if they see them leaving. A good tip is for the parents to give something of theirs, such as a favourite garment, for the child to “take care of for us, until we get back.” Somehow this seems to reassure the little one that they will definitely be returning.
Just relax, and have fun. Children can sense if you are tense, and it worries them.

etheltbags1 Fri 19-Jul-19 21:05:42

It all went well. We playd and went out then i took her to other gran. I worried about nothing .dd and partner had a nice time so glad.