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Should I move to be by my daughter

(108 Posts)
Hithere Tue 04-May-21 20:14:10

Stay put

What if you move and visit frequency stays the same? What if she moves?

Why do you say she wont be pleased if you decide not to move?
How often do you see her now?

NotSpaghetti Tue 04-May-21 20:06:01

16 miles is very close. Even at 30mph if you or she drives it's only half an hour.
I'd stay put if I liked my area.

Redhead56 Tue 04-May-21 20:04:10

My daughter lives over sixty miles away it not far but I don’t drive on motorways so rely on DH. We were considering buying a small house near her but were put off. The prospect that they might move as their family grows or her husband changes his job location etc.

Our son lives only five miles away from us with his family. All our friends are here too they are like our family. We are also very involved in local volunteering here plus it’s where I grew up it’s where I am happiest.

If you have nothing holding you back and you could get property there don’t hesitate. It’s not far away if you want to visit friends. Weigh up the pros and cons what do you really want to do and will you be happier? Important issues you need to think about and take into consideration including your age and health. Get back to us and let us grans know what you decide ?

Oopsadaisy1 Tue 04-May-21 19:40:55

I travel 8 miles each way to my local supermarket! Takes me 12 minutes each way, I can’t see that 16 miles would make a difference to Her if she wanted to see you, however it will make a big difference to You, so don’t rush to move, if you are happy where you are then stay.

Teacheranne Tue 04-May-21 19:40:42

What if she moves away in a few years time after you go and live near her?

My great uncle sold his house and used some of the money to build an extension so she could live with his daughter. Over the next fifteen year, until he died, he ended up moving four times as his son in law changed jobs. He was very loved and welcomed but he struggled to make friends of his own and became very dependant on his daughter for company.

lemsip Tue 04-May-21 19:39:06

stay put. you could move closer and end up seldom seeing each other anyway.

Sara1954 Tue 04-May-21 19:35:55

Well I’d stay put if it was me, sixteen miles is no distance at all.
If you are happy and feel comfortable where you are, I definitely wouldn’t rush into anything.
Take your time, and look at all the pros and cons.

Sparkling Tue 04-May-21 19:28:16

I see my daughter rarely, although 16 miles away, she said if I move nearer she would see more of me as I get older. It’s a lovely village and I know I would make friends. I am concerned leaving the life I have and a neighbourhood I know so well , I keep thinking half an hour isn’t too far if she wanted to see me now. Advice would be appreciated as I know she won’t be pleased if I decide to stay. There’s just this niggle.