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Sleeping alone

(132 Posts)
Jennyluck Tue 18-Jan-22 20:44:47

I’ve just discovered the joy of sleeping alone.
Dh has dementia, and has started going to the toilet during the night, a lot. Which unfortunately wakes me up, there’s also snoring, coughing, sniffing. I find once I’m awake, I can’t get back to sleep.
I can’t have my own bedroom because we have a full house, with 2 ac and a grand child.
So I had a brain wave of buying a sofa bed. I bought a really good one.
Oh the joy of a peaceful nights sleep.
Anyone else gone down this road. ??

Shandy57 Tue 18-Jan-22 20:50:41

I think a lot of couples sleep separately for various reasons. My husband and I had separate rooms following his heart attack, unfortunately I snore and he was having difficultly sleeping, so went to the spare room.

Humbertbear Tue 18-Jan-22 21:05:23

We are sleeping separately at the moment because we are both ill. I would love to be able to pluck up the courage to say that I want to make it a permanent arrangement.

Zoejory Tue 18-Jan-22 21:14:14

We recently got an Emperor bed. Going from a double to this size has been such a delight

I'd have been very happy to get separate beds but DH wasn't keen. So we plumped for this massive bed and it's wonderful

Sashabel Tue 18-Jan-22 21:19:59

I love having my double bed to myself. Since my partner and I split up 6 years ago sleeping alone has been a godsend. It was one of the many things that improved in my life when he finally left. I could never share a bed with anyone again.

Blossoming Tue 18-Jan-22 21:22:33

We have had separate bedrooms for years, for health reasons. It works much better for us.

sodapop Tue 18-Jan-22 21:40:33

Same here Blossoming I can read and fidget to my hearts content now.

Atqui Tue 18-Jan-22 21:57:35

Humbertbear Ditto

GrandmaSeaDragon Tue 18-Jan-22 22:04:48

My DH is a night owl and I am a lark. We’ve had separate rooms for ages. It began when I had problems with my back and I found it impossible to get to sleep, and then to be woken again when DH came to bed at midnight was very trying, not being able to nod off again for hours and feeling guilty about putting the light on to read. My elder DD moved out about that time, so we had space to spread out. We have moved twice since then and now have his and her ensuites - absolute boon! (May sound “posh”, we aren’t- they’re very compact but functional and we are very lucky). It works for us, a good nights sleep is so important. We celebrated our golden anniversary last year.

Oldbat1 Tue 18-Jan-22 22:08:09

Separate here too due to health reasons.

Luckygirl3 Tue 18-Jan-22 22:20:16

We bought a super king size bed many many years ago. OH was on call at night so much and it meant he could slip away without waking me too much. He could have been having an affair for all I knew! We had an on call phone line on his side of the bed and the family line on the other. He used to ring me from his side of the bed to say he was coming over!!!

The big bed was a godsend when he became so ill as I had a bit of space, but in the end we had to change it for a hospital bed for him to sleep in. I eventually went into the spare room as the nights were awful - shouting out and paranoid. We had a carer sleeping in who used to do some of the night visits.

All very sad really.

MayBee70 Tue 18-Jan-22 22:24:24

I don’t think many people realised that the doctor they were seeing that day had probably been on call the night before. Looking back at it it was totally wrong.

Kate1949 Tue 18-Jan-22 22:25:06

Separate rooms for us due to DH 's horrendous snoring.

GrandmaSeaDragon Tue 18-Jan-22 22:27:18

Luckygirl3 flowers

Kate1949 Tue 18-Jan-22 22:29:14

Very sad Luckygirl

Ohmother Tue 18-Jan-22 22:59:10

Separate bedrooms for a year now. Great sleeps!!! Saves me from trying to get to sleep with his horrendous snoring, so I put the light on to read and relax and he wakes and moans I’m keeping him awake with having the light on. He’s retired; it’s me that has to go to work in the morning!!

Kim19 Wed 19-Jan-22 08:43:28

I've a double bed all to myself and can never figure why I don't sleep in the middle rather than changing sides whimsically. Had a word with myself but nothing happened!

Marmight Wed 19-Jan-22 09:08:44

After 10 years of widowhood I don’t think I could ever share a bed with anyone else. I’ve become so used to my own space. I still sleep in our kingsize bed and do the Alice in Wonderland thing. 6 nights one side then 6 nights on the other so I’m not constantly battling with linen changes! The joy of clean sheets without the hassle of changing them. The unused side is my ‘office’; everything I need which then gets shoved to the other side each week 🤣

BlueSky Wed 19-Jan-22 09:13:46

Luckygirl flowers Enjoy sharing with your partner till you can! sad

AGAA4 Wed 19-Jan-22 09:24:39

I have slept alone for many years. I wouldn't want to share a bed with anyone now.

25Avalon Wed 19-Jan-22 09:26:44

Separate rooms after dh came home from heart surgery and stayed that way. On the plus side I can read as long as I like or in the middle of the night with no one moaning about the light. A couple of times when we have been in the same bed I don’t sleep well as I try not to move around as I am now used to in our King size. On the minus side I miss the company.

henetha Wed 19-Jan-22 10:10:18

Sleeping alone is one of the great joys of my life now after years of sharing a bed with a snorer for many years, and then a restless leg sufferer.

Witzend Wed 19-Jan-22 10:24:57

One or other of us started sleeping in a spare room months ago, when we both had bad colds - lots of coughing, plus we’re both up and down to the loo quite a lot anyway, and disturbing the other.

It seems to have become a permanent arrangement. I often sleep very badly anyway, so want to read, have the radio on, go downstairs for a cup of tea, etc.
It hasn’t meant that our relationship is at all less close, though.

However ‘my’ bed is the king size guest bed, and we have a guest coming soon for 4 nights, so I’ll be moving into a small single room, that’s a bit of a dumping ground for ‘stuff’ - inc. all the Christmas decs still waiting to go back in the loft. I’m going to miss my lovely KS bed…😩

Redhead56 Wed 19-Jan-22 10:32:04

Luckygirl13 💐 we are in separate bedrooms because of health issues too. Since we had an empty nest it makes sense.

GrammarGrandma Wed 19-Jan-22 10:35:03

I would be very sad if we ever had to have separate beds/rooms. We share an ordinary double quite amicably and it's nice to be cuddled.