Going it alone

Lindylooby.Very best wishes for today. Hope all goes well. and

Lindylooby

Lindylooby, I shall be thinking of you today, you have had such a long wait for the funeral. I hope the occasion goes well, and that you and the family manage some smiles along with the tears.

Yes I sometimes think widowers are forgotten, their loss is as great as ours, sometimes even more so, if it had been the other way round here, my hubby would have been completely lost, he refused to learn how to cook, couldn't even use a microwave & he was an electrician lol. But again there was a widower in this village, every widow in the area used to take him food, clean his house etc , he must have thought he was in Paradise lol, I think he found it hard to find any time to be alone at all, he wasn't rich, was quite grumpy so I don't know what the attraction was

There may be widowers too on here thinking what about us. Three widowers in Durham have written a book"after She's Gone" it's on sale I believe at AgeUK. John Clark , Philip Tattersall and can't remember the third.

Sorry Spindrift I didn't want to expand on 'PM' and sound patronising. If you hit the box to the right of the 'log out' box up above, you'll see messages.

PM is Person Message Spin x

Sorry Sel, what is a PM? not up to all the abbreviations yet lol.
Good morning by the way xx

Aka what a perfect quotation.

Night Spindrift - I sent you a PM earlier. Sleep well.

I say goodnight to my hubby's photo every night, the house doesn't feel quite so empty then. Nite everyone sleep well, have happy dreams xxx

Lindylooby one step at a time.
Lovebooks you must still be in shock.
Spindrift It does seem life is very fragile.

For all of you who have been through this.

Just gave my DH a kiss and he called me a silly old bugger. I am blessed.

((((Hugs for all of you)))

Spindrift
Lindylooby
Life is uncertain, fragile.
"Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak whispers the o'er-fraught heart, and bids it break." - William Shakespeare.

Lindy I did the same "10years ago.
The day of the funeral was a lovely day. We all had a 'party'in the garden. He would have loved it!
You'll get through it. We all do. It's not easy, but we manage.
Just remember the good times and try to celebrate his life rather than mourn.

Thank you all for responding. Well we got through yesterday, lots of tears and laughter. Worst thing was (haven't mentioned it to the kids) there was 7 of us for a meal, table of 8 given to us and guesswhere the empty seat was - yes next tto me? I excused myself went outside and had alittle cry!
Glad the day is over. Dreading the funeral on Friday, been speakin to Mike's photo - got angry Saturday night and shouted at him asking why he left me, then apologised cried and felt better. My best wihes to all those who hve lost their OH and to everyone else , treat each day together as if it is your last life isso fragile and canchange foreverin anano scond.
Lynne

I think what hit me most was how fragile life is, my hubby went out to help a neighbour, saying be back in about 10 minutes, he had decided he wanted fish & chips for tea, we didn't have them often as we are a distance from the nearest fish & chip shop, that was it, he never came back, we just don't realise how fragile it is as we live each day, each hour, but again maybe it's for the best we don't think about it, the one thing none of us has any control over to you all

Well said Gally and generous too, (((hugs))) to all of you. Hope you had a good time in Sussex.

Love the poem Ella

I've been particularly nice to DH since this thread started, though I know it won't last, and nor should it really.

Just back from my signal free birthday weekend in deepest Sussex and catching up on this thread. There are so many sad stories and it's heartening, in a strange way, to know that we all have the same emotions and feelings of disbelief, loneliness, anger, loss and desperation. to Mandylou Flyinggranny,Lindylooby, Lovebooks Spindrift and Mazzer and all other grieving wives and husbands

He never seemed to be down after she died, he was always cheerful, but it was all still in there , bless him.

what a lovely verse, sad,yet beautiful, I think there are many, myself included who can relate to those words x

Ella That's lovely. I remember your feelings about your Dad .... and his shed.

My mum died 10 years before my dad,who adored her, and after he died I found this verse in a wooden music box that he'd made for her.

I often lie awake at night while the world is fast asleep
I think about you always with tears upon my cheek
I'll never get over losing you no matter how I try
I'll always keep you in my heart and love you till I die

On the same tack - have you read 'How to Be a Merry Widow' by Mary Rogers? She manages to be funny, moving and at the same time, practical. Published by Third Age Press

Hi Sel, I am originally from Anglesey in North Wales. Yes this is a lovely area I can see the Lakeland Hills from my windows here, I look across fields of horses here as well, a farmer retired & sold his land, people with horses bought it & have let it in sections so always plenty of horses to look at plus my daughter's 2 Shetland ponies in my fields, I am very close to the sea here as well (300 yards) but no beach it is marshland.