75 going on 40

I have posted on the wrong thread at times seclusion. Easily done. Don't worry about little things like that. Keep posting.

'Old age is priceless. You can't borrow it. You can't steal it. You can't earn
it. You can't inherit it. You can't merit it. So if you are fortunate enough to attain it, for heaven's sake enjoy it and don't complain about it'
Found this quote on a scrap of paper in a book of my mother's after she
died. I think people in their sixties are young and my children in their fifties
are like teenagers.
I reckon its OK to moan to friends about getting old. Unfortunately I am
outliving all my friends and worried about becoming stupid like posting
on the wrong thread which I have done.before now.

Since I am 70 I assume I look, think and behave like a 70 year old.

I'm happy with that.

What a strain for middle aged and elderly women these days with the pressure to strain to stay as 'young' as possible.

I don't hold with it and I blame America!

chrissyh enjoy my mum and dad travelled all over with Motocycle (dad riding, mum just going along with what ever) also camping etc lol

I'd tell you kitty but I can't remember!

I was 65 a couple of weeks ago and I'd love to find out how a 65 is supposed to feel and behave. Is there a handbook that I wasn't given?

We keep getting these comments about 'young people now find visiting their older relations a chore and ignore them'. Where is the evidence that this is what the younger generation as a whole do?

When I look around at friends, neighbours, wider family as well as my own experience. it is clear that this does happen in some cases, but there is nothing unusual about that, it has always happened. But the majority of younger people I know and hear about are close to their parents and older relatives, My children live 70 and 200 miles away, of course we do not see them every day or every week, we usually see each otherr every six weeks or so but in between we are in constant, almost daily contact with them through email and telephone.

I worked with elderly people for a long time and my general experience was of families that loved and cared for their older relatives and relatively few who saw little or nothing of their families.

I have days when I feel 90! But I keep it to myself apart from moaning to you gransnetters. No matter how hard I try I don't look 40. No matter how hard I try I can't do what I did at 40 and when I try and I do try honestly, that's what makes me feel 90.

hi absent --so you feel that accepting age and ill health, along with moaning and groaning about the pains or weaknesses that attack; is what life is !
seeing those in my younger days, of all ages too; after the war, mostly wearing black for those who they lost- but now could not afford to buy new coloured items, other than a scarf; yet these same people were trying hard to be happy and social, most people sang or whistled even in the street, which cheered others up! most visited their folk regular or had elderly living with them; life was hard ! but I don't believe we are any happier today with so much more money and life style--elderly are more lonely! no one whistles or sings in streets or shops; supermarkets have taken away the one to one personal chat in friendship !
so what is good about growing old? better to keep fit as possible, enjoy life as full as one can as long as one can ! so as not to be a burden to offspring ! who these days have very little time for visit old family --its a chore--don't know what to talk about, and certainly don't want to listen to their moans --or their younger days --even memories of the war years !! which were so tragic.
far better for us and them -that we stay young as long as we can get away with it - or even as long as it gives us a pleasure ! I still love trying on newish fashions --though some I ignore totally -lol
not quite in with the in crowd --but on the fringes ! deafness is my main handicap ! which puts me close to do-lally in public places when I hear or rather `don't hear correctly' lol
so for all you budding nans-grannies, go for enjoying every day , get out and about share your lives, here too ! you have worked hard for this! In praise of mothers nans and grans and great grannies.

I'm 66, which I don't feel is old these days, but get shocked comments when I talk about my DH & my motorcycling holidays both here and abroad (he rides I just enjoy the scenery) . I like the quote from Thora Hird 'You don't stop doing things because you grow old. You grow old because you stop doing things'.

C .S.L.
being dignified , is an admirable quality , I"ll have you know !!
x

Only questioning the idea of dignified Nonu makes you sound like Dowager Countess of Grantham

You're as old as you feel! I am same age as Mary Berry - 78. I am still going up the stairs two at a time - Long may it last!

Jane

Gally
That makes two of us.

I don't really understand what she is saying. I know I can be a bit dim sometimes and it is 2 am and I should be fast asleep, but really it's totally incomprehensible to me.

Reading all the discussions about age is interesting,it's surely all about personality.Weve all met people who are in there teens with an old head on there shoulders.Ive met a few and tend to give them a wide birth.and then there's the elder generation with a twinkle in ther eye who instantly I am drawn to.If your not ill or suffering you are just basically going to be how you where when younger.I am 66 and love spending time with my15 year old Grandaughter.However yesterday I could not think how to make porridge! Have it most days.

Excuse me , Miss moffat , I dis actually add the rider , I MY O.

I am not so sure, the word 'person' does define us. A headline; 'person killed' is hardly helpful, whereas 'Mother and child mown down by drunk driver', may not define but it does give a description that tells us a lot about the event ands those involved.

Who I am is defined by a number of factors, which includes education profession, personal status and the life experience all those things have made me who I am. It is irrelevant and dismissive descriptors that irritate me. If I was giving an opinion on modern child rearing methods then to describe as a grandmother of 2 is reasonable, but if I am objecting to a local windfarm it is irrelevant.

The descriptor 'pensioner' is almost always irrelevant and is lazy journalism because the person using it does not know whether an older person is receiving a pension and that phrase is used to describe people in an age range from 60 - 110, or even more, an age range of 50 years.

Dignified nonu? As if!! But seriously I hate labels or most of them. We are people first - not accountants,doctors, pensioners or even mums or grans - these may describe us but they do not define us.

I like the quote by Maurice Chevalier - Old age isn't so bad - when you consider the alternative!

I am not keen at all on the word pensioner >
Much prefer the American term Senior , sounds more dignified IMO

Family relationships are complex and I never feel easy when we castigate children because a parent is neglected.

Family relationships start at birth and we can all think of examples we know of poor parenting now, much of it more subtle than violence or physical neglect. Children grow up and move away and their parents morph into dear old people who miss the children they rarely see.

I made home visits to older people for 10 years and I saw every range of family relationships from the kindest, most supportive, with children making heroic efforts to support their parents to others where parents had little or no contact with adult children.

I spent some time visiting an elderly man, a poor thing, devastated by the loss of a wife he adored and unable to cope without her and with adult children and grand children he never saw. It was by chance when visiting a neighbour, also a client, we saw this man in the street, and she turned to me and told me that he was an unpleasant violent man who had terrorised and hit his wife and children and, in his mid-80s, had been banned from the local pub for threatening someone with his walking stick. The neighbour did not know he was one of my clients and I said nothing.

Of course some good parents end up with selfish neglectful children but family relationships break down for reasons that may date back decades before the parents reached old age.

MaryXXX respect we live in a similar retirement development housing but I am fortunate that the neighbours are all nice people and we don't tend to have any "gossipy tea parties" every now and then during the summer/warmer months we have a party and my neighbours are all partial to the odd tipple which makes for a good time. Enjoy your future marches & demo's how about doing some festivals and ditch any idea of knitting.

I so agree with the sentiment of preferring to be older than the alternative. My Dad died at 71, he had not long retired,my Mum died a year ago at 89. I used to work with the elderly, and it drove me potty when they moaned about being old and infirm. My Dad would have liked the opportunity to be old, but didn't get there.I know that aging is crap, but dying is worse.