My 94 year old father lives in a care home just 5 minutes away from me. He is there because of failing physical health but dementia is also starting. He is reasonably happy there but seems to be getting more and more reliant on me rather than less. I visit most days but he phones me at least once a day - usually about something trivial. He seems to be constantly thinking of things he needs me to do for him - the latest being that he thinks he needs a new hearing aid (he never wears the one he has got)
The final straw came last week when my brother who very rarely visits came for 2 days and Dad still found a reason for them to come to my house each day.
My own health is not good (severe IBS) and I feel in desperate need of a break from him but everytime I do visit he asks when I will be going again - and if he goes for more than a couple of days without a visitor he gets anxious and complains of feeling abandoned. My cousins visit him about once a month and he goes to church every week and there is lots going on at the carehome but he still seems to need this very frequent contact with me.
I don`t think there is an answer to this but I really needed to get it off my chest!
Hate - jealousy of stepson
Dread - pests in the attic
Shocking - sinkholes