Loneliness is more dangerous to our health in retirement than smoking.

I'm really sorry Gally but I misread your revelation that gn has been your lifeline. I thought you meant gin!

Well done Gally for tackling the king-size mattress - you deserve a medal! I hope that things are going OK with you.

When my friend had an op and her OH had to look after her, he was very independent, refusing all offers of help. His Waterloo, however, was changing the duvet cover, and my friend caused great hilarity when describing how, after about 15 minutes of struggle, her OH finished up sitting on the floor inside the duvet cover, unable to escape! - and loud expletives were emerging from under the fabric - I wish I had been there!

I am not very good at being on my own - although I do enjoy moments of peace. I write poetry and quiet is a help with this.

I sometimes wonder whether our tendency toward one-age communities for people who are elderly is a good idea. I have always seen great benefits in a generational mix - but it's not for all I guess. I would hate to have no contact with young people or children - when there are concerts/shows at our local village school everyone is invited - I think that is a very good thing.

I think the key to keeping well in old age is to have interests, whether they are ones on your own or with others. My Dad (91) likes nothing better than to watch the TV - and I look on this positively - he is learning new things from documentaries, getting excited by tennis matches etc. Other elderly friends are dashing about pursuing their gregarious interests. Horses for courses really!

But old people do need to have others on tap in some way for help when needed.

Heyanne welcome over here! I've bumped into you over on the other site

I agree with you - you can't beat face to face. I'm sorry about your situation with dtr and gdtr - take a look at Denied Contact thread under Relationships - lots of interesting info and support, and you will see you are not alone.

Chat with you later

Hello annandgraham welcome to Gransnet, we have a few Grans in a similar position. There are a few threads running which deal with contact problems.

I think some people enjoy their own company

We are in sad situation of being estranged from our daughter and grand daughters so we feel is fun to socialise more with friends then do not keep focus on our sad situation!

Some people are happy on their own, but loneliness is a crippling burden on todays society when so many of us do not interact face to face as much does anyone agree? Texts and emails do not take the place of person to person contact.

Thank you Annobel - dust fairies needed as are oven cleaning fariies, floor mopping faries and while we are recruiting, a 'yes woodburners are lovely, good for environment, dog likes lying in front of it when wet and very muddy but how dirty' fairy especially when sun tends to shine a bit now and all slovenly habits revealed. Perhaps if I stopped 'playing' on GN and looked for duster which is also lost I could make a bit of a start - or perhaps another day.

Dust? What dust? grrrranny , you can call on me any time. I'm not sure that I possess a duster at the moment, or if I have, it's at the back of the unspeakable under-sink cupboard where I cannot possibly reach it. Dust fairies, please!

Anyone who visits me just to measure the depth of the layer of dust can stay away.

Thats right grrranny we are very delicate, not need for muscle when we have a wand

We can be slim as we can magic the movement of mattresses and don't need huge muscles - have I got that right?

though in real life it would more likely have been the bedpost!!

no, jeni, the wing!

(Laughing out loud at the thought of the galumphing me as a fairy!!)

What. The bedpost?

That counts me out then

whoops! just caught one of my irridescent (!) wings on the bed post! No matter, i am a fairy so it repairs immediately

grrranny bed bugs bite we on the other hand don't we are very friendly fairy's.

granny I think I have got to the stage 'take me they way you find me' if they want to visit no the mattress fairies are very young, very pretty, very thin fairies

Bed bugs definitely not allowed in my house grrrranny

Shyness and something about upbringing - don't be a nuisance, don't show off, don't get angry, etc make it hard for me to be spontaneous. I would never dream of just turning up at a friend's house without an invite and even with an invite I'm a bit hesitant. And I always compare my house and its thick patina of dust with the tidy homes of others so don't like having visitors who probably wouldn't want a cup of tea in case they caught something! I need two weeks notice of a visit just to tidy up. I would like to join in as a mattress fairy though as long as it isn't anything like a bedbug.

A big to all the fairies - hope the discs haven't slipped!!

I am very shy in RL, dont seem to have a problem on here I find it really hard to make small talk to people I dont know and sometimes worry that I am taken to be stand offish. Its something I try to overcome but at 56 I dont know that I have come very far

gally I know just what you mean. Living on your own takes some getting used to!
I got the Gardner to turn mine for me. He does the garden on Monday and then on a Friday he does all the littlejobsthatPeter would have done!lightbulbs turning mattresses etc.
If you can afford it it is well worth it to have a handyman annour a week!
I get lonely too. And like Annobel am really shy, I've found gn to be a lifeline whenim really down.
I bless the day my dd suggested I look at you.
Bless you all.

gally How I wish I lived near to you I would send around my big strapping son to do the job for you,he has just finished helping me refit the valance sheet on my bed,I must really buy sheets with valance fitted it would save such a lot of work.