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What makes you feel nervous?

(44 Posts)
grannyactivist Wed 15-Aug-18 06:40:49

I'm privileged to be officiating at a funeral service today and I'm feeling quite nervous. As her Chaplain I knew the deceased well, and at the request of the family I was with her when she died. I very rarely feel nervous when I'm taking other services and I often speak to large audiences, but leading a funeral feels like an enormous responsibility and requires a huge amount of trust from the family as I write the whole service myself. So, I've been awake for a couple of hours now - even though the outline has already been agreed with the family I have it here on the bed with me just checking and double checking everything. I've even got my clothes ready and the service isn't until this afternoon.
So, what nerve-wracking things do you do that gets your palms sweaty and keeps you up at night?

jenpax Wed 15-Aug-18 06:48:48

I often represent clients in tribunals and occasionally county court.I get extremely nervous every time despite having done this for nearly 20 years!
I am generally ok with public speaking which I also have to do fairly often! but I do get anxious if I am delivering training?

ninathenana Wed 15-Aug-18 06:49:20

I'm sure you will conduct the service with dignity and sensitivity ga but I can see why you are nervous.
I don't do anything that keeps me awake or gives me sweaty palms but I do get nervous of driving long journeys. Not sure why as with SatNav it's hard to get lost maybe it's fear of all those idiots on the road.

ChaosIncorporated Wed 15-Aug-18 07:06:23

I do hope the service runs smoothly for you grannyactivist

I am always nervous when a client with a red flagged risk assessment arrives for a meeting which I know will upset them. The mask stays in place, and logically I know the panic alarm is in reach and other staff are nearby, but there is always a sweaty palm sensation.
Silly really, as the safeguards are always in place and when incidents have occurred they have never been in those controlled meeting situations.

Mapleleaf Wed 15-Aug-18 08:36:14

I'm similar to you, ninathenanna. It's driving to somewhere new, especially if there's an appointment involved, that keeps me awake!

Anniebach Wed 15-Aug-18 08:41:32

Housing officer’s house inspections, my bungalow is clean but my tummy churns when she goes into my bedroom , one’s bedroom is so private .

kittylester Wed 15-Aug-18 08:49:02

I'm sure it will all be fine GA but going to funerals makes me nervous even if I have no attachment to the deceased.

kittylester Wed 15-Aug-18 08:51:41

Posted too soon!

I gave a friend who is a celebrant and she also worries about funerals. I suppose because everyone else is nervous and it really matters whereas mistakes are part of the fun for other celebrations.

lemongrove Wed 15-Aug-18 10:15:45

You are understandably nervous about officiating at a funeral GA ( who wouldn't be?) Good luck with it, hope it goes well.
Had to chair a meeting recently at very short notice ( not huge about 30 people) and it was fine, but was nervous just before doing it.It was more the short notice than anything else, as ifI am prepared, then no problem.
Long drives to unknown places, especially if dark make me nervous, but thankfully don’t happen often.
Giving bad news to somebody also makes me nervous ( of their reaction I guess.)

Luckygirl Wed 15-Aug-18 10:32:32

Long journeys - I hate everything about it! Why do I go on holiday? grin

I worked for a brain injury team and the worst case scenarios are engraved on my memory.

grannyactivist Wed 15-Aug-18 10:36:10

I think you're right about the context kitty. Weddings and baptisms are such happy occasions that I'm sure a bit of humour will override any slip ups, also I do many more of those than I do funerals; the last funeral I took was an internment two years ago. This is being held at a crematorium that I've visited often, but never officiated at before. The daughter sent me a lovely reassuring email a couple of days ago, so I sense she understands how much it matters to me to get it right.

Willow500 Wed 15-Aug-18 10:48:36

I'm sure you'll be fine - as you knew the deceased personally this will make your service very special to her family.

It's driving that makes me nervous these days as I do it so rarely - that and the fact that I've now got a much smaller car and engine so don't feel quite so confident in it any more. I have to go to London next week for work by train and plane and must admit I'm a little nervous of that - even though I've travelled on my own quite a bit it's been some time since I last did it. Also meeting new people there which is always a bit scary!

Billybob4491 Wed 15-Aug-18 10:53:24

What makes me nervous? hospital appointments for my husband to see his Consultant always brings me out in a sweat.

rubytut Wed 15-Aug-18 11:50:46

Driving on a motorway or some dual carriage ways. If I am invited somewhere or have an appointment my first thought is the driving route and the day before I cannot sleep. This has been for the last 5 years.

harrigran Wed 15-Aug-18 12:57:13

I do not get nervous now, having stared death in the face nothing much can worry me.

grannyactivist Wed 15-Aug-18 13:12:01

Okay - I'm off to the crematorium now, sweaty palms, butterflies in tummy, dry mouth and all.

Grammaretto Wed 15-Aug-18 16:55:59

I hope it went well.

B9exchange Wed 15-Aug-18 16:58:10

DD or DiLs going for baby scans, I'm so aware that things might not be perfect, awaiting the result of one now and fairly terrified.

starbird Thu 16-Aug-18 09:19:30

Driving somewhere new does it for me, I have a small car, quite old but regularly serviced, but if something happens at 60 mph you’ve had it (and if you do less on certain roads you become a nuisance to others). I take a ‘scenic’ route wherever possible.

Anniebach Thu 16-Aug-18 09:22:43

These days it seems everything makes me nervous

Sheilasue Thu 16-Aug-18 09:29:23

I am sure you will do great. If the family are pleased with what you have done so far I am sure it will be fine.
Good luck anyway and celebrate the persons life.

Pinkshoes26 Thu 16-Aug-18 09:32:47

Going into the unknown. Not knowing what to expect makes me nervous. Yesterday, I went to choose some new glasses. I was so glad I had looked up what the shop had to offer first. By the time I entered the shop I knew what I needed by way of x2 pairs x1 clear glass with blue filter and x1 pair that will change to shades for summer. Both reduced thickness. It gave me more confidence to say.

Applegran Thu 16-Aug-18 09:47:46

Grannyactivist - will you let us know how it went? And thank you for sharing - we all have things which make us nervous, but don't always feel able to say so.

Kim19 Thu 16-Aug-18 10:00:02

In days of yore (thankfully!) it was board meetings that brought on gentle tremors in me. I knew my subject inside out and my department was pretty streamline but there was always someone who managed the difficult 'put you on the spot' question. It took me a while to master the mature art of saying 'I'm sorry, I don't know the answer to that but I will get back to you' instead of a cover-up fumble of words. I would go straight back to my department, find the facts, convey them directly to the questioner and then circulate a copy to all other board members. Didn't ever take all the colly wobbles away but certainly improved things for me. I'm so loving the joy of retirement. Busy but without pressure. Wonderful.

Telly Thu 16-Aug-18 10:10:01

I think the key to any occasion, happy or sad, is the preparation. Seems that you have done all that needs to be done in advance so perhaps you can relax a bit now. You want to do your best and have done as much as possible in advance. I remember my fathers funeral, the priest kept getting his name wrong...........