What would you give this Grandson at Christmas?

He's has joined the ranks of adults. How time flies!

My GC are little, so I can't speak with experience of adult GC, but I've had nieces and nephews who have been the same as your GS.

Could it be that he's changed his mobile number? Perhaps you could ring it, see if he answers. Or, ask your son if the number you've got for your GS is correct.

IF the number is right and he's simply not bothering to reply, I'd be inclined to send him a card (money inside, that's up to you) and then not bother so much after that.

He is over 18, he is officially an adult. Adult rules apply.

Just a card, I would say.

I have the right mobile number. I text to ask if he would like to meet up for me to buy him a meal, the answer is yes. As he is busy, has lots of friends and a girlfriend I then ask what evenings are best for him. 3 times now, he does not reply to tell me.

I think you are all right, he is now an adult as he is nearly 20. But a card on it's own isn't going to go down well. Maybe I'll send him over a few cans to soften the blow.

A bottle of craft gin, some artisan beer or similar - but he doesn’t deserve it!

A card with an IOU for a pizza date with Grandma! he can take it or leave it then!

We decided as a family to stop giving Christmas gifts to nephews and nieces once they reach 18. The same rule applies to grandchildren. Your grandson is an adult now, I would stop sending a gift.

Perhaps try card with money and take on board PECS's idea of humorous IOU for pizza date with Grandma. He might respond positively.

If you don't hear much from him next year, just a card next Christmas.

I understand you are missing your grandson bluebird and hurt by the lack of contact. If there’s a clear understanding in the family that adults do not receive gifts then no, he shouldn’t receive anything. At 19 he is an adult. A card with an iou for a pizza would fit the bill in my view. I don’t think a Christmas gift would turn the clock back with him. He’s busy, has a girlfriend, time will fly past. Try not to be hurt, it’s a natural progression I think.

Completely agree with PECS - a great solution.

It is very sad and bad-mannered not to respond (I've been there!) I'd try one more time - what about cinema vouchers? Also, enclose a self-addressed card to acknowledge receipt. If this doesn't work, just send a card in future.

If he doesn't react to your texts, why don't you try ringing him?

He's still a member of your family so why wouldn't you include him on your christmas list ? I buy for my OH's niece and nephew who are mid 20's as well as their partners and my SIL and her husband .OH hasn't a big family and I wouldn't dream of leaving anyone out .I remember my MIL telling me that her cousin who was more like a sister used to buy for everyone except FIL and he was quite hurt about it so I wouldn't hurt anyones feeling in the same way.To be honest I dont think many 19 year old boys (in particular) spend time with aunties and grannies nowadays .I know I only see OH's family on MIL's birthdays when we all have a meal together .Send the boy a card and some vouchers or stick a tenner in it for a drink ,he's your grandson for goodness sake !

Yes I think I would send a card with a tenner as well. As Paddyann says 19 year olds are not good at keeping in touch. I think you should tell him when you do meet up that you are sad about not seeing him.

If you would usually/normally give him something don't stop just because he doesn't contact you as much as you would like, but let him know that whatever happens you only do Christmas/Birthdays until their 21st???

I’m inclined to agree with paddyann . I would still put the money or a voucher in his card.

I am a great believer in keeping the opportunities for contact open so perhaps still send something certainly until he is 21. It doesn’t need to be much. It would be interesting to know what he would say if you asked him to pop round and help you ... move a piece of furniture, sort a door handle, whatever. He might be nudged into visiting with a more obvious purpose. Boys of 19 do mature into generally lovely kind young men.

I agree with Feelingmyage, don’t close doors,
Sometimes they gravitate away and then as they mature gravitate back.
A card, A tenner and a gift voucher for a meal with you. Put an expiry date on it, that may concentrate his mind.

Bluebird, he is 19 ....honestly, as much my grandson loves me, I don't think he'll have a one to one with me, in a restaurant and he's only 16. Mind you, I haven't asked hm yet, so I could be wrong. I always have his sister and him together and we go out together for lunch etc
I also have 2 adult sons, one of whom would happily , (well, used to anyway), sit and have a meal with me. The other won't , unless his wife is with us. Everyone is different.
As for Xmas gifts, I give everyone money and a small token wrapped gift to open on Xmas day. Christmas has become so stressful for most families....

I would of thought from my position of ignorance ( no GC yet) that GC are a bit like our own children and should always have a present.

I think the voucher ideas are good, or the card with a tenner inside. He probably has a lot more spare cash than you do at the moment.
Keep in touch though. It is the thought that counts.

Send a cheeky card with a daft message, just for fun.

Don't sit there mouldering and point scoring....make light of it....Whats up with you? Too cool for Grandma now?