I have entered with my clipboard lemon. I want to check out the bar staff and the menu before I commit too donning my finery and propping up the bar.
Oiled shirtless barman? FRESH food? Good company? No undesirables loitering outside. or collapsed on the floor? State of the patrons? Entertainment? Fresh straw put down for the ferrets and the incontinent? Men in uniform? Decent beverages, not watered down?
Yep. All the boxes ticked, so in my finest red leather hot-pants, fishnets, thigh high white plastic boots, fake fur bolero, chestnut wig, false eyelashes and tiara I shall grab that saggy old chair in the corner and give this place a bit of class.
Are we all on baby-sitting duty when the octuplets arrive???? If we keep it in-house, can we have a bevvy or two whilst child-minding, and do health visitors now approve of a drop of brandy in baby's bottles of milk?