I think it is possible to overestimate how many friends people actually have
DS and DDiL, seem to have a huge circle of friends, built from work and special interest contacts, they both work in jobs where the boundaries between leisure interests and work can be very fuzzy. However when you look at that social network in detail. The number of close friends they actually have; people they ask to be godparents, confide in, go away with and include in family celebrations is actually much smaller, probably not much more than 6.
I think the one mistake lonely people mostly make is in concentrating on wanting to make the one or two close friends and not realising that for most people, their social circle is made up mainly of the wider group and that the individual friends usually arise organically from that wider group.
Also, as Bam shows you need to make an effort yourself. I am still close to my best friend from school, when my children were small and from work and when I look back I can see that they were the ones befriending me, rather than the other way round.
The friend I have made through GN is special, because I decided that it was time for me to change and be more outgoing, I knew she lived near me, I knew she was facing difficulties so I PMed her and suggested meeting for coffee. I am so glad I did. But it could have not worked, we could have met once and decided not to repeat it. It is the risk you have to take and not be crushed if it doesn't work out.
It is not easy to go from