Malapropisms

was it an intended malapropism though? The best ones have to be said innocently!

I'm not sure whether these are malapropisms or not, but when my sister in law was moving they were throwing a lot of their belongings away because they were going "mimalistic". My brother in law was talking about their dog who used to get very uptight when a cat came into the garden "He goes absolutely bearsick!" he said. .

My MIL was the Queen of Malapropism and of Spoonerism - all quite unintentional but hilarious.

My neighbour had panasonic views from her hotel room.

My nan always had dislocated coconut!

An old neighbour used Domestless bleach!

A friend used underarm derodent and had a son who suffered with an athletic foot.

My grandma used to put verdigris on her chips.

My late neighbour, bless her, used to buy "moffits" to sew on her children's clothes. i.e. motifs. She was also a believer in " stertificates" from the Dr.

I rather like domesticated Coconut its no much tastier chelseababy

My nan used to love weatchin her televiewer

Not a malapropism just stupid predictive, watching not weatchin

My aunt used to refer to the menopause as the monoplus.

When admiring my neighbours newly painted room she told me that her husband swore by Durex to do a good job and give a lovely finish.

My Mum said, when talking about childcare, that people were fortunate if they could get a place in a quiche for their pre-school age children.

My FIL manned the car park for Blenheim palace as a little job after retirement. He had larger spaces for Dobermans (Dormobiles) and limerines.

Ex-teachers will remember that in spelling tests we'd provide a context by putting words into a sentence. So my mum helped her class learn how to spell words containing double letters with the sentence 'The children want for a piddle in the maddle of the pool'!!!

Went not want!

My mothers best was , when two jets collided over Germany, the pilots were lucky as they had time to ejaculate!?

I remember my elderly neighbour telling me about the holiday in Germany she had spent with her son. "We had a week in the Bavaries - it was really beautiful!"
And the friend who was telling me about their new car. When I asked what sort it was she said "I think it's one of those Chisellers!"

I love all these. We do use Malapropisms deliberately and try to keep making up new ones. I think anyone outside the family must think we are very thick. Our most used one is that our washing machine is in the artillery room.

I bought my DD a pair of sketchers as he has trouble with his feet, due to medication his feet get very painful and itchy, he was delighted with his trendy trainers and tells everyone they need to buy scratchers just like his.

Trolls are toilet paper here.

My mothers best was , when two jets collided over Germany, the pilots were lucky as they had time to ejaculate

That has got to be one of the funniest ones ever Galen

They were very lucky indeed and no wonder they collided. That's what I say!