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Regrets, I’ve had a few

(39 Posts)
MawBroon Tue 20-Mar-18 09:14:04

Enjoying my second brew of the morning I got reminiscing, prompted by the “Becoming an adult” thread and looking back at my 70 years, was thinking what I regret and whether the is too late to change.
I have come to the conclusion that being brought up to be a bit too “good” (never a rebel, always aiming to please) I have been too complaisant all my life.
I actually looked it up as I was afraid I was confusing the word with “complacent” (which I am not)

www.dictionary.com/browse/complaisant

What, if anything, do you regret?
And short of just being a GOW-grumpy old woman- is it too late to change?

Teetime Tue 20-Mar-18 09:41:03

I don't know where to start!!! Yes I have a million regrets mostly about poor choices I made and opportunities missed hence my question a few days ago about getting therapy. These things are eating at me now.

silverlining48 Tue 20-Mar-18 09:47:46

Regrets? I have a few....but then again too few to mention....

I have spent too much of my life regretting or dwelling on what was done to me, as well as what I may have inadvertently done to others. Can I change? Yes, I think we can always change despite,or perhaps because of, our many years of life experience.

MawBroon Tue 20-Mar-18 09:47:49

I remember. Maybe therapy/counselling is the way forward?

Chewbacca Tue 20-Mar-18 09:54:07

Someone once told me that opportunities are easier to see with the benefit of a rear view mirror. For me that's true. The opportunities I had in my youth are all to clear for me to see now that I'm too old to use them.

HAZBEEN Tue 20-Mar-18 09:56:39

This thread title echoed what I had been thinking yesterday. The song My Way was played at Dads funeral yesterday morning and last night my daughter and I were talking about how my Dad had fulfilled so many of his dreams (to travel, his house etc.) and I said I wish I had had his zest for life. On the other hand he brought me up to be a lady(!) and he always said females should be happy with what their husbands/partners wanted! Well I wasnt! Hence my divorce and at times a rocky relationship with my current OH. Now I am possibly a little past it for some of my ambitions and health stands in the way of others but the one regret I will never have is for all my first marriage was hell I have my beautiful daughter and from her my gorgeous Grandson.

Lynnebo Tue 20-Mar-18 10:00:49

I was at death’s door a few months ago but amazingly got a second chance. I know that if I had died all my regrets and pondering would have disappeared into the ether, so I have made the decision to let them go and not waste a minute of my new life on what has happened previously.

Franbern Tue 20-Mar-18 10:03:36

Always consider the words 'if only...' the two saddest words in the English language Even the worst times often have a positive outcome, and for those of us fortunate enough to have reached (and passed) our three score years and ten....then we should try to remember the good times.

KatyK Tue 20-Mar-18 10:08:11

I have lots and lots of regrets but I realise that they are pointless. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

Grannybags Tue 20-Mar-18 10:09:49

I sometimes wonder what I could have become if I'd been more of a swat and less of a rebel at school. But I'm quite happy with my life now so no regrets.

Scribbles Tue 20-Mar-18 10:10:31

Moi? Je ne regrette rien.
The past cannot be altered. Learn from your experiences and then let go.

Anniebach Tue 20-Mar-18 10:13:35

I regret decisions which have affected others and I regret trusting too easily.

Bathsheba Tue 20-Mar-18 10:15:07

It's probably fair to say that my biggest regret is not fully understanding that "life is not a rehearsal" until it was too late for the opening night.

Lindylo Tue 20-Mar-18 10:16:12

I regret making the wrong choices at school. I studied what my friends did just to stay with them rather than doing my own thing. It was a hard lesson not to be repeated.

OldMeg Tue 20-Mar-18 10:18:37

No point in having regrets, it won’t change anything. But you can change the present and the future if you have the will....

KatyK Tue 20-Mar-18 10:26:13

My upbringing and things that happened to me as a child made me fearful and I always felt that I couldn't 'join in'. I still feel the same really - as though I am on the sidelines. I know there are those who will say 'well it's up to you to change'. I'm not sure about that to be honest.

gillybob Tue 20-Mar-18 10:29:14

I have so many regrets I would’t know where to start. When I was younger I regretted getting pregnant at 17 . I said it had ruined my life . Now I look at my three beautiful grandchildren and think how lucky I was . If I hadn’t had my son I wouldn’t have them either .

ginny Tue 20-Mar-18 10:55:31

No point in regrets.

Never let what was or might have been spoil what is or could be.

annodomini Tue 20-Mar-18 10:56:17

Je ne regrette rien! Regretting is a waste of time and energy. There are, no doubt, things I could have done better - or not at all, but from every decision I can remember making, some good has eventually come. Broken marriage? How can I regret having my two lovely sons?

Bellanonna Tue 20-Mar-18 11:17:03

lynnebo that was a moving post and you are so right. I wish you a happy and healthy future.

Stansgran Tue 20-Mar-18 11:18:51

I have always wanted to follow the road to Santiago de Compostella from Paris. In my student days a friend had a room on the rue st Jacques and I remember standing in the middle of the road facing south and saying I would follow that road but I never did and I'm not fit enough now.

Blinko Tue 20-Mar-18 11:28:51

I wish I'd realised that one of my DSs might be high functioning autistic/aspergers. It wasn't so much of a 'thing' in those days. I hope I wouldn't have been so impatient with him. Fortunately he has risen above it all and is a lovely son, husband and Dad.

Bellasnana Tue 20-Mar-18 11:37:20

There are a few things I wish I had done differently, but they are not really regrets. Life is hard enough without torturing yourself with ‘if onlys’.

goldengirl Tue 20-Mar-18 12:05:22

I made a vow to myself when I was young not to regret anything - it's a waste of time. Learn from the experience and move on has been my mantra which I've repeated to my children and grandchildren. However some regrets have taken longer to get over then others but it's worked overall.

DanniRae Tue 20-Mar-18 12:25:14

I regret being too 'sensible' and not having a few flings before I married..............I am definitely coming back to this world as a reckless tart!! wink