Care Home how much luxury is required?

I cannot answer this question but just wonder how anyone can sustain paying over £70,000 A year when the the husband is at home having to maintain that and keep up a decent standard of living.
It is beyond me to understand.
My H will need to go into a care home soon but while I am here we will have to be subsidised to some extent by the state. If or when I need care then the house will be sold but until then I must keep a roof over my head.

I can honestly say that cost isn't always an indicator of superior care.
I would be looking at what they can do for each individual.

15 years ago they sold their business, downsized their home. and invested the surplus. He was very successful in business and the stock market. They were ‘careful’ with their money their whole life, but even in the early years they never had to struggle

£1600 per week is over £83,000 per year !

How could anyone (short of a multi millionaire) sustain this amount?

Sorry over £80,,000 A year and she is only 80 and may live into her 90's.

Oh I see Flossieturner well in that case..... money might be no object.

Sad for those of us who will have no choice but to go for the very cheapest for our loved ones.

I would judge by the atmosphere. MIL was in a fully funded home but everyone was happy, staff and residents. Some luxury homes I have visited seem more interested in the extras than the basics.

In some "luxury" care homes the staff are told to spend more time making the home look fancy & tidy for visitors than making the residents comfortable....

Find out if she can STAY there too... lots of homes save money by not taking their residents back from hospital if they deteriorate. Less sick residents mean you can skimp on staff numbers. Posh/fancy care homes do this, don't assume that they're any less profit margin driven than cheaper ones.

Look for one that does a mix of residential care and nursing care. That way once settled in, they can STAY even if their care needs increase and require qualified nurses.

Otherwise theyll be dumped on A&E by the home to die in hospital instead of at home!

Look for one that does a mix of residential care and nursing care.
I agree; one aunt of DH was in a care home and, after a spell in hospital, they would not take her back so her family had to find somewhere else fairly quickly that was a nursing home too.
The best one was not the most expensive.

Yes, gillybob, it's mind-boggling, isn't it.
and probably only about £10,000 for a trip to Switzerland, which a friend and I are pondering.

I had this discussion with DH only the other day Jalima having been in one or two of the LA run care homes I think Switzerland might be our only option.

The only elderly relative I have now is my dad . I will look after him in his home as I did my grandma for many years . Wouldn’t want my children to have to look after me though .

It's all about the atmosphere not the extras. Interview the manager. The highest quality care permeates down from the top. It's an attitude.
Try sitting quietly in one of the lounges and observe the staff when they don't realise family members are there.

Those prices .
Mum was in a very comfortable care home from '97 to 2002, and paid about £300 a week.
But she didn't have en suite - I think it was the new regs that forced owners to put up the fees.

All I can say is that my FIL spent some time in a very grand care home near Oxford before we sorted out much better arrangements. Its was beautifully furnished had hotel standard food and menus and the management seemed very proud of everything. On a day to day basis the staff were efficient and polite however, because we were visiting daily as it was a temporary measure we soon realised their social interaction was cursory. If an alarm went off staff would pour out from offices and what seemed like cupboards but once a matter was dealt with away they scuttled. No one seemed just to stop and chat. The atmosphere was stiff and formal and despite the grand surroundings all a bit miserable.

I would suggest a fairly early visit, to check the 'getting up' routine, as its the busiest time.
Then an after dinner visit to check that everyone isn't tucked up in bed by 5.45pm

I regularly go into care homes and I would say that price is definitely no indicator. The question I would be asking is, 'how good is staff retention'? If staff have been working there for a long time then they obviously enjoy their jobs - and if the staff are happy it usually means the residents are too. In 'my' care home (I'm the chaplain) there are staff members who have worked there for decades, the lovely tea lady has been there for thirty years. The other thing I would be looking out for is less tangible, but something about whether the place feels 'homely' and welcoming. If the mum is going to be spending a lot of time in her room then the staff should have a culture of popping in and saying hello as appropriate.

sadly retention can actually be a BAD sign in care homes. Sponsored overseas staff can be forced into long stays at homes they are treated badly in. Or face huge penalties for leaving.

Agree with visiting EARLY. If the less mobile residents are all up then they may have started washes at 5am to suit the staff not the residents!

so thats the bad stuff. Now for the GOOD stuff to look for:

"landmarking" helps elderly people stay independent for longer, so the home should not be decorated the same throughout, each corridor/are should look distinctly different (eg one corridor with pictures of flowers, another with pictures of animals). This means they have consciously designed the decor to promote independence.

There should be colour contrast without being overly busy.

Thank you for the input. Both homes are close to their retirement complex and they have visited both. Some previous residents have moved into the homes, so they had a good idea of what it they are like.I think the daughter is looking at it emotionally and son practically.

It does come down to whether one home is worth £20000 a year more. The money won’t last forever

Notanan2's post is excellent. Being asked to move your relative because the care home can no longer meet their needs is a very upsetting and difficult situation. I have experience of this and it's something I had never previously thought about.

Florida, do they have a spare room? Would a live in carer work? It doesn't sound as if the lady is very active and needing a lot of care. Or a daily private carer if she sleeps well at night?

She is unable to communicate, eats very simple food, does not drink, does not like to be touched

Living in her own home with a carer or perhaps two sounds like a good option - and perhaps less expensive.

I think Grannyactivist's point about staff retention is a good one.
I used to visit an old lady in a care home (after Mum died) and the carers were mostly agency people, kind enough, but they didn't really know the old ladies.
Not like the permanent staff who looked after Mum.