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Does anyone over 50 here still suffer from being broody?

(90 Posts)
overwhichhill Wed 24-Apr-19 19:49:54

I can't get my head around the fact that I still want another baby.... I am over 50 and in peri-menopause for about 10 years now, but I just wish this longing for another baby would go away. I am not sure whether stopping my periods altogether will help, I am on HRT and they are irratic even with this. So asking the wisdom of Gransnet to help me how do I get my head right!

Lily65 Wed 24-Apr-19 19:50:59

nice user name.

overwhichhill Wed 24-Apr-19 20:03:20

Thank you Lily65 - It is my first time venturing over here, I have been on mumsnet for years, and wanted a new name!

phoenix Wed 24-Apr-19 20:06:42

Oh definitely, every time I see a litter of kittens or puppies, I get very tempted!

Babies? Human babies? NO!

overwhichhill Wed 24-Apr-19 20:16:57

So there is no hope for me phoenix, I still want the human version. Tried a puppy dog version recently, but was allergic to it, so failed!

Eglantine21 Wed 24-Apr-19 20:22:12

Oh yes and my menopause was more than twenty years ago!

I’d love to be pregnant again and give birth.

And then opt out😬

(Actually my boobs still tingle when I’m near a crying baby)

BradfordLass72 Wed 24-Apr-19 20:43:55

Just recently we had a thread about 'reborn' babies; and how some women buy them and treat them as real children.
They look and feel and, to a certain extent act, like real children.

I could quite understand it as I would have dearly loved more than my 2 boys but circumstances prevented.

I worked in child care for many years and until fairly recently volunteered in a kindergarten. So I understand completely your broodiness.

Look on YouTube for 'reborns' if you've never heard of them. They definitely fill a need for many hundreds of people all over the world.

Framilode Wed 24-Apr-19 20:52:22

I sometimes dream that I have just had a baby and it is always a very vivid dream. I am thrilled to have a new baby and then I wake up and am sad that it's not real. Funny thing is I was never that maternal in real life.

I think I understand how you feel, it's that chance to start again and maybe do things differently. Also the feel of your newborn in your arms.

overwhichhill Wed 24-Apr-19 21:01:19

Bradfordlass72 - It is partly grief in me as well, I had 12 miscarriages after my last child, never really stopped trying for a last baby, but it never happened, age got in the way. I am not sure I would find a "reborn baby" doll any help. But it is good to know that others have experienced this too late broodiness and that I am not cracking up totally!

Please can someone reassure me that it does get easier? Or any hints as to how to refocus the mind?

overwhichhill Wed 24-Apr-19 21:02:24

Eglantine21 - did it get easier after menopause or stay the same?

Sara65 Wed 24-Apr-19 21:10:53

Three of my grandchildren had reborn dolls for Christmas, they are so realistic, just the right weight of a new baby, and they smell delicious!
I used to get this weird physical sensation whenever I picked up a new baby, a real yearning feeling, and then one day I just didn’t anymore! So hopefully it will pass for you too

watermeadow Wed 24-Apr-19 21:16:50

I’m very much older thanover but still dream of having babies, peer into prams and adore small children. I don’t actually wish I could start all over again.
Having pets certainly helps. So does looking after a pair of squabbling grandchildren with revolting manners.
Losing all those babies must have meant years of grief, which time will ease

sodapop Wed 24-Apr-19 21:29:55

Absolutely and definitely not.

I'm so sorry for all those of you who lost their babies that is very hard.

M0nica Wed 24-Apr-19 21:55:48

No, never.

Mycatisahacker Wed 24-Apr-19 21:59:15

No freaking way grandchildren are enough!! grin

I have 4 Ac but was never broody just careless grin love them to bits though

Give me puppies and kittens any day.

Sorry for your losses op x

notanan2 Wed 24-Apr-19 22:07:36

Yes me and at this point I have accepted that it will never go away.

I realised that even if I had had more kids, I would still be broody, so that reconciles it for me a bit.

Babies dont cure broodeyness. Not for me. Each baby I did have just made me more broody

Granny23 Wed 24-Apr-19 22:32:45

I was told, after my 2nd DD was born, very severely jaundiced due to an extreme blood group incompatibility, that I could go ahead with another pregnancy safely, because they would do a complete blood change in utero if necessary. This was enough to totally put me off the idea of another pregnancy. However when I was menopausal in my mid 50s, I was suddenly plagued with broodiness and so sorry that there could never be another baby. Thankfully, this feeling disappeared when menopause was complete and I was happy to wait for the Grandchildren to arrive.

I presume that it is your hormones being all over the place that causes this surge of maternal longing.

ElaineI Wed 24-Apr-19 22:46:50

I always wanted a 4th baby but DD2 was 5 weeks early and had cord round her neck so her heart rate kept going down as she was born and there was a resuscitation team outside the room. DH was as white as a sheet as I was on oxygen so couldn't put him through that again. DD2 split from abusive partner when DGS2 was 9 weeks so we have been like his 2nd parent for a year which has been lovely but exhausting and I feel at 62 my body would say no to having my own!

Eglantine21 Wed 24-Apr-19 22:50:32

I would always be up for another pregnancy, till my dying day I expect. So no, OP, the menopause made no difference.
I was totally with the 63 year old woman who acted as a surrogate for her daughter.

It was my intensely practical nature that stopped me from having a big family.

And some things that went wrong in life too.

harrigran Wed 24-Apr-19 22:52:27

No, never broody. I have had two children and do not see the need to have more than the replacement for DH and I.

CanadianGran Wed 24-Apr-19 23:05:31

Not for me. I had my third baby at 32 and never felt the urge for another. I felt my family was complete.

I am so sorry to hear of your many miscarriages; each one must have been an anguish for you. Perhaps you are meant to cuddle more babies in your life, whether as a volunteer at a hospital or daycare, or even a foster mother.

stella1949 Thu 25-Apr-19 03:42:40

I can understand. I'm sure I didn't do a very good job with the ones I had, and I'd love to have another one to love. I dearly love my 43 and 39 year olds - but yes I can sympathise with the feelings of wishing you had another chance.

Blencathra Thu 25-Apr-19 06:51:29

Gosh- no!
How about being a foster parent?

morethan2 Thu 25-Apr-19 07:41:37

No but I’d like to rewind the clock for just a little while and spend more time with my beautiful three as babies. I’ve been lucky and been allowed to be a very hands on Nanna so that has filled the maternal void. There’s nothing like a baby is there? Some of us are just programmed to want to nurture.

ninathenana Thu 25-Apr-19 08:42:11

Definitely not !

A new GC yes (never going to happen) who dosen't love to cuddle a new born but you can give those back smile