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What do I bring when I'm guest as thank you for staying

(17 Posts)
ineedamum Thu 06-Aug-20 17:06:54

Hi, I'm staying at a friends for a few days and wondered what to do as thank you? Do you offer money for food? Pay for meal out/takeaway ? Do I just bring food? Or just flowers?

Lucca Thu 06-Aug-20 17:13:07

Hard to say without knowing more. Have you been friends for a long time ? Have you been before? How well off are you ?

Normally I’d say a bottle or two and some flowers.

How come you are staying in a friends house at the moment by the way ?

ineedamum Thu 06-Aug-20 17:17:32

She has a large house so easy to socially distance.

She is fairly new friend and I haven't been to her house before.

GrandmaKT Thu 06-Aug-20 17:20:05

I would pay for a meal out. That's what we usually do when we stay with friends/family. Definitely don't bring food, I think I'd be a bit insulted if a guest arrived with their own supply!

Franbern Thu 06-Aug-20 17:21:06

Usually, if I stay with someone, or they stay with me, the host and hostess are taken out for a Thank You meal. Then, upon my return home, I would usually send some flowers as extra Thank You.

Dinahmo Thu 06-Aug-20 17:21:51

Depends how long you're staying for. Living in France we often have friends stay for a week at a time. They either contribute to the shopping or give me some money. They will also take us out for a meal. It's nice being taken out for a meal but that still means that I have to feed 2 extra people for a week, plus the booze of course.

If we're going back to England by car, we'll take wine and perhaps some cheese that they can't easily get. That depends upon who we're staying with and for how long. Sometimes we might take them out for a meal.

geekesse Thu 06-Aug-20 17:24:06

In such a situation, I take a bottle, flowers or chocolates when I arrive, and then write a proper handwritten thank you letter when I get home, saying what I enjoyed especially about my time there and saying nice things about their house, children, pets etc.

If someone has been kind enough to host me, I try by doing that to give them pleasure, confidence and pride in their life, which lasts longer than a costly thank-you gift.

harrigran Thu 06-Aug-20 17:42:00

I bought Molton Brown shower gel, hand wash, room fragrance and candles nicely gift wrapped.
We always take hosts out to dinner too.

ineedamum Thu 06-Aug-20 18:06:26

Thank you everybody for some great tips and suggestions.

Susan56 Thu 06-Aug-20 18:16:48

If we stay with my sister in law we will usually take them out for a meal and buy flowers after our visit.

TwiceAsNice Thu 06-Aug-20 19:46:05

I stay one night with a friend when we are both going out with a crowd of friends at Christmas. I always take her a bottle of her favourite wine

Kittye Thu 06-Aug-20 19:57:08

I like harrigans suggestion. It’s something different from wine or flowers. I’d be really appreciative of that idea 😊

Alishka Thu 06-Aug-20 21:25:50

A special plea to NOT arrive with flowers! Easy enough for you to buy but a chore for the recipient who has to immediately find vases, arrange them,etc. just at the time when really all she wants to do is to welcome you,etc.
If you want to send Thank You flowers later, tho, that's fine.

geekesse Thu 06-Aug-20 22:05:18

Alishka, I love it when people bring flowers! I guess you need to know your host a bit to know what is acceptable, though. I keep a couple of empty vases to hand in case I’m lucky enough to receive flowers.

Alishka Fri 07-Aug-20 09:09:52

geekesse I always, but always, have fresh flowers around, and it's not that they'd be unwelcome, in fact it's lovely to receive them as a thank you after they've gone grin

annodomini Fri 07-Aug-20 09:18:31

I'd send flowers after I left. It's what I'd like to receive.

glammanana Fri 07-Aug-20 09:23:00

I would always take the hostess some of her favourite body crème/soaps gift wrapped on arrival and send some postbox flowers once I have returned home they have always gone down well as a thank you.