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Are you a confident person

(126 Posts)
Judy54 Sun 11-Apr-21 16:21:48

I was not confident as a child or as a teenager but feel that I have gained more confidence with age. I always had faith in myself at work but not so much in social situations. I still don't like parties and much prefer mixing in smaller groups to large ones. How about you would you describe yourself as self assured and confident?

Calendargirl Sun 11-Apr-21 16:23:27


Kate1949 Sun 11-Apr-21 16:25:11

Nil confidence here. Likewise self esteem. Zilch. None.

AGAA4 Sun 11-Apr-21 16:29:24

I am much more confident now than I was as a younger woman. I am happy in my own skin and have learned to be self reliant since my DH died.

Kim19 Sun 11-Apr-21 16:30:38

I like to think so but I do know my limitations.

Grandma70s Sun 11-Apr-21 16:33:34

I don’t like parties either, but that’s because they bore me, not because I feel shy. I think I’m quite confident in the situations I find myself in, but there would be some outside my comfort zone where I wouldn’t be.

I was brought up to be able to make conversation, so on the whole I can. I’m a bit scared of people who despise small talk, though. Do I have to say something brilliant or witty? I can’t do that.

NotTooOld Sun 11-Apr-21 16:36:42

I am quite confident although perhaps less so than I was when young and working. I find younger people sometimes don't take older people seriously which can be quite frustrating. I am not keen on parties and prefer smaller groups.

Blossoming Sun 11-Apr-21 16:42:56

Yes, once I learned to stop caring about the judgment of others. If somebody doesn’t like me I just walk away.

GrannyGravy13 Sun 11-Apr-21 16:44:39

If you had asked that question prior to lockdown I would have answered yes I am confident.

Now I am not sure, returning to previous life/lifestyle is beginning to feel a little daunting!

Jaxjacky Sun 11-Apr-21 17:02:36

If you’d asked me this time last year I’d have said no, I had a tough time with anxiety which has taken some time to come back from. Prior to that I was, I too was brought up to be sociable and respect everyone, it’s stood me in good stead, I think I’ll be ok going forwards.

grandMattie Sun 11-Apr-21 17:05:51

Nope. Never have, having had very controlling father...
Never been able to do (or stand) chitchat. Don’t do crowds and big parties, sort of agoraphobia.
I have got a bit better with age.

tinaf1 Sun 11-Apr-21 17:24:18

No, but depending where I am and the situation I can pretend I I am , then fret about it afterwards 😔

Ellianne Sun 11-Apr-21 17:26:53


No, but depending where I am and the situation I can pretend I I am , then fret about it afterwards 😔

That's it tinaf1 appear serene and cool even though you're sinking inside!

BlueBelle Sun 11-Apr-21 17:32:45

No I m not confident , I’m much much better than I was but still find it an uphill struggle Funnily enough everyone thinks I am very confident but it’s been such hard work and I must be a good actor
I love the idea of parties but I’m so uncomfortable that I don’t enjoy them as I should I pretend but it really is an uphill battle nobody seems to know though
I ve missed so much in life being so lacking in confidence and shy
It’s interesting to know others aren’t that confident as I always think I m the only one who isn’t

MerylStreep Sun 11-Apr-21 17:33:45

Oodles of it. Too much so the OH and the children tell me.
The only thing that makes me anxious ( and sometimes terrified) is heights.
All through this shit storm that we’ve had to deal with for the past nearly 13 months I haven’t been worried, frightened, anxious. I often wonder what it is that I don’t.

TrendyNannie6 Sun 11-Apr-21 17:34:16

Yes, I am, quite assertive, if I have something to say I’m afraid I say it, not in a nasty way, but I do speak my mind, Used to be quite quiet growing up, Never start an argument though but I will stand my ground, and always stand up for the underdog, but never a bully, can’t stand bullies, I will say although I’m confident I couldn’t stand in front of an audience and speak, like my son and daughter do, but other things yes no problem

TrendyNannie6 Sun 11-Apr-21 17:35:11

I hate parties lol

BlueBelle Sun 11-Apr-21 17:56:45

You see trendyNanny standing up for the underdog I wouldn’t call anything to do with confidence I can do that very easily if I m doing it for someone else..... it’s me I don’t stand up for

M0nica Sun 11-Apr-21 18:00:52

Confidence has nothing to do with confidence. It is everything to do with appearing confident even though you aren't.

And realising that that is what everyone else is doing.

Confidence also has nothing to do with whether you enjoy parties or not. I do not. I much prefer to be with people one-to-one or two-or-two.

TrendyNannie6 Sun 11-Apr-21 18:05:53

You have to have the confidence to stand up to bullies, that’s what I’m meaning in respect of standing up for the underdog bluebelle, confidence in helping out another person, as well as having confidence standing up for myself! I’m really not bothered about anyone’s opinions of me, as long as my lovely family think I’m ok and my friends do too, that’s all that matters to me,

TrendyNannie6 Sun 11-Apr-21 18:08:42

Confidence means feeling sure of yourself and your abilities Not in an arrogant way either

LauraNorder Sun 11-Apr-21 18:21:54

I was a confident child, an unbearably shy and anxious teen with a nasty mother who constantly criticised. Met my husband at age 15. Became happier but remained shy until we emigrated at age 20. Went to uni, got a law degree, had children, made a good life and gained oodles of confidence.
Love to entertain, enjoy a good party and hope I go out of my way to make others feel comfortable which is a great help in feeling confident oneself.

B9exchange Sun 11-Apr-21 18:36:02

I was desperately shy as a child, would never have the confidence to speak up in class, always convinced that if I waited long enough, someone else would come up with what I wanted to say.

I had to get over that a bit when nursing, you have to go up to complete strangers and do fairly unmentionable things to them with barely an introduction. But the thought of public speaking was utterly terrifying.

When I became a Chair of a national committee in my 50's, I had to stand up in front of conference audiences, and that was scary, but it did get a bit easier. I think my confidence has grown, walking into a room full of strangers would not unduly faze me, but I would never describe myself as super confident!

Biscuitmuncher Sun 11-Apr-21 18:43:33

I'm quite confident. And also I don't know if its because I'm an only child but I also think pretty highly of myself

Sago Sun 11-Apr-21 18:45:16

I’m a good actress.