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(12 Posts)
Bumboseat1 Sat 08-May-21 14:41:32

A few days ago me and my hubby had an invitation to go to a friends birthday party but we have to pay for our own meals , was a bit surprise that we have to pay. It’s quite a journey, don’t want to be mean but is this the thing these days ..

Aldom Sat 08-May-21 14:48:52

Some few years ago a lady I know had a 'big O' birthday meal in a local hotel. Guests told me afterwards that they paid for their own meals /drinks.

Aldom Sat 08-May-21 14:50:45

PS I wouldn't want to do that. I'd prefer a smaller gathering and I would foot the bill.

EllanVannin Sat 08-May-21 14:52:36

I couldn't do that, even if I had to do the catering myself.

suziewoozie Sat 08-May-21 15:06:41

Oohhh I love a good thread on this topic. There’s loads on MN. Seriously I think in general you should celebrate your birthday in a way you can afford to pay for yourself. With real friends ( and who wants any other kind) they’d be as happy with a simple afternoon tea party as anything else to join in your celebrations. I’d hate all the sorting out of money afterwards and the dreaded ‘shall we spilt the bill between us ‘ usually proposed by the person who drank the most and had the most expensive items on the menu. I went to one celebration where all the drinks were paid for, it was a set meal so all paid the same per head and transport to and from the restaurant was organised and paid for. That worked well but I’d still go for what I could afford to provide for myself. But we all know our own friends best and what we think is acceptable in our own circles though don’t we ? I would just never want to financially embarrass a friend or put one in position of not being able to come

AGAA4 Sat 08-May-21 15:41:27

If I invite people then I will pay for their meals but I do know some who ask their friends to pay for themselves. Just a personal choice I suppose.

Beechnut Sat 08-May-21 15:44:19

I once went to a very small wedding and we had to pay for our own meals.

sodapop Sat 08-May-21 15:48:34

Definite no no for me. Tailor the celebration to what you can afford comfortably.
I agree with suziewoozie all that sorting out of payment afterwards takes the pleasure out of the occasion. There is always someone who wants their bill accounted for down to the last crumb.

hazel93 Sat 08-May-21 16:26:46

People inviting you to a party at the moment !!
Oh please - so wrong on so many levels .

timetogo2016 Sat 08-May-21 16:59:34

What a bluddy cheek ,pay for your own meal ? NOOOOO.
Happy birthday but won`t be attending or sending a gift.

grandMattie Sat 08-May-21 17:05:10

Same here. either pay for it all yourself or son;t invite so many. Like EV, I'm most likely to cater myself - wear myself to a fraszzle and not enjoy the paryt!

Kim19 Sat 08-May-21 17:12:17

I'm trying to figure out how this works. Does one pay a guesstimated price in advance or is the bill divvied up on the day at the occasion? Somewhat messy and celebration crushing to my mind. However, I've never received such an invitation and really don't expect to but..... who knows?!!