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Family rows over wedding dress

(87 Posts)
Newatthis Mon 02-Aug-21 15:33:52

Surely the bride to be should have the choice?

GrandmaKT Mon 02-Aug-21 15:41:47

I must admit I had to google the painting, but it is a beautiful dress. Just the medieval style I used to fantasise about wearing when I was a young girl.
Why on earth would anyone object?

Kim19 Mon 02-Aug-21 15:50:11

Bride's day, bride's choice methinks.

Septimia Mon 02-Aug-21 15:53:26

Since most of the brides who wear white aren't virgins anyway, I can't see that there's anything wrong with wearing something more unconventional.

Yes, it's the bride's choice and the dress looks lovely. I'd fantasise about wearing something like that, too. What a shame the family are spoiling everything.

Hellogirl1 Mon 02-Aug-21 16:06:41

I once saw a beautiful all black wedding dress at an exhibition, but my daughters were horrified when I suggested black for their weddings, but like has been said, Bride`s choice.
When daughter 2 went shopping for her dress, her fiance went with her, as, in his words "You`re not walking down the aisle in something I don`t like"! And she actually bought his choice!


BlueBelle Mon 02-Aug-21 16:12:04

No ones blooming business if she wants to get married in a bikini up to her

Kali2 Mon 02-Aug-21 16:15:59


Bride's day, bride's choice methinks.

Exactly., especially if paying for it themselves, and in this case, even sewing it. Bravo.

MerylStreep Mon 02-Aug-21 16:18:28

I went to a goth wedding in the 80s. The bride had her black, traditional style dress made for her. The 2 bridesmaids bought their dresses from a charity shop and dyed them black.
They all looked fabulous 😄

Blossoming Mon 02-Aug-21 17:01:50

JWW did more than one painting of Ophelia. Maybe the family thought she meant the one where she’s wearing a white dress? Anyway, I love the paintings and I love the dresses, so good for her.

Mattsmum2 Mon 02-Aug-21 17:08:40

It’s beautiful and she will look stunning I’m sure. No ones business but the brides 😀

ginny Mon 02-Aug-21 17:09:45

I hope she sticks to what she wants. If the family say they won’t go to the wedding that’s their loss.
I wonder if they would object if she told them what they should wear.

maddyone Mon 02-Aug-21 17:25:15

The dress is beautiful. She should wear the dress she wants to wear. If she wanted to compromise I suppose she could make the dress in cream instead, and still use the gold and red trims.

bytheway Mon 02-Aug-21 17:39:50

When my stepson got married 15 years his bride to be picked her wedding dress and the dresses for her bridesmaids, they were beautiful fairly plain silk dresses, one of her bridesmaids was my stepdaughter (23 at the time) she hated the dress and asked the shop if she could take the dress meant for her so she could change it to suit herself (she is a decent seamstress) the shop got on to the bride to be and all he’ll let loose.

Stepdaughters mother back her up and both were promptly uninvited from the wedding. They later relented on the mother but stepson and his wife didn’t speak to his sister for 7 years after that…they did ‘thaw’ in the end.

V3ra Mon 02-Aug-21 18:01:40

I can't believe that poor bride's family are being so awful to her! What else are they going to try and dictate?

I made my own dress, which was fairly simple straight lines. My Mum was making my sister's dress, she was my bridesmaid and fifteen years old.
I told my Mum the pattern number I wanted her to use, the style went well with my dress, and said my sister could choose any colour of fabric she wanted. Back came the message that she didn't like that pattern and which one she would prefer, which was a more puffy style.
I said well when it's her wedding she can have a puffy style if she wants it, but not for mine!

vampirequeen Mon 02-Aug-21 18:14:41

I saw a young couple in Whitby who had a goth wedding. Her black dress was stunning.

M0nica Mon 02-Aug-21 18:17:54

My, admittedly white, wedding dress was a mini dress bought for £5 in a boutique in Reigate High Street - and this for a church wedding. I had a maid of honour, who wore a suit (it was February).

I think this bride's choice of dress is lovely. I suggest she elopes with her husband and they have a wedding in a lovely flowery garden to go with the dress. Leave the rest of the family at home to continue their bickering.

Maggiemaybe Mon 02-Aug-21 18:46:40

Good grief, what a family! The dress is beautiful imho, but even if it wasn’t it’s the bride and groom’s day and the dress choice should be hers alone (I personally think that extends to the bridesmaids’ dresses as well). And as for the mother leaving “crying voicemails”, has she really nothing else to worry herself about?

Eloethan Mon 02-Aug-21 18:56:05

What a weird family. I think it's quite magnificent that she's making the dress herself.

White is, of course, traditional but I think it is probably a long time since all brides were virgins at their weddings.

Sara1954 Mon 02-Aug-21 19:27:39

God, what an hysterical load of rubbish.
One of my daughters had a red velvet medieval style dress made, with lots of gold lace, it was stunning.

Redhead56 Mon 02-Aug-21 19:41:32

Our daughter went too a few bridal shops in Lancashire and I went with her and her future MIL. We had a lovely day she picked her dress and we both loved it then we had lunch. We also went to the final fitting. No arguments just a wonderful day.

BigBertha1 Mon 02-Aug-21 22:39:46

My youngest st daughter wore a red wedding dress. She looked wonderful

grannyactivist Mon 02-Aug-21 23:14:25

A few years ago I attended the wedding of a close friend who wore an amazing black dress to her wedding, she had on an amazing ‘mata hari’ type headdress and her ‘bouquet’ was an arrangement of greenery. Brides day, bride’s choice! My friend looked stunning and, as a very unconventional woman, was true to herself.

Deedaa Mon 02-Aug-21 23:24:52

The idea of the whole family getting involved seems so weird. Surely the bride's dress should be a surprise on the wedding day? Probably her mother involved and the bridesmaids but that's all.

Callistemon Mon 02-Aug-21 23:32:30

Well, I wouldn't choose Ophelia's dress myself (bad luck?) but she should be able to wear what she wants on her wedding day.

I think brides have only worn white since the time of Queen Victoria.

agnurse Tue 03-Aug-21 08:06:39

That's a beautiful dress, and in fact it IS very traditional - brides often wore blue back in the day in honour of the Virgin Mary. Otherwise, they were often married simply in their best clothes.

My understanding is that Callistemom is correct - white wedding gowns have only really been in vogue since Queen Victoria wore one for her own wedding.

My sister and I are both married, as are two of my brothers. So we have had four brides. Three of us wore white, and the fourth wore white with purple on the bust of her dress. All of us looked beautiful.