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I remember when my mum got a mobile phone she rang me from the centre of town to tell me quite loudly she was Christmas shopping and had got DGS vd! Whilst I knew she meant a DVD i dread to think what passers by were thinking.

When we first got our dog,Turned to my wife,and said "We must get her Microwaved!!" (Microchipped??) was what i meant.

It was quite some time ago now; I had been out to do a bit of food shopping, and after I got home and had put it all away I was alarmed to discover that I couldn't find my purse. I searched everywhere I could think of, phoned up shops, the lot.

It was in the fridge.

My 90 year old mother was quite impressed with Walking with Dinosaurs. So much so that she that she asked me if I knew that dinosaurs had been found!

Deep in conversation with my daughter while boarding a train, I needed to look at my mobile phone to check the time as she was meeting me at my destination. In a panic, I told her I couldn't find my phone! She put my mind at ease, 'You are talking to me on your phone, mum!'

Standing in a very long bank queue reaching the counter and realised I wasn't in the post office, the cashier thought it was hilarious, doh ! Then of course had to go and stand 20 minutes in the bleeding post office.

a favourite was my late Nan, brother shouted out to her to get him his coat, 10 mins later she came out with a round of toast!! we all cracked up but having bad hearing myself now, I can understand it!!

My SiL came out with a classic senior moment. Both brothers installed solar panels around the same time and when the clocks changed she mentioned we would be making more money on our panels as there was going to be an extra hour of daylight.

Rushing to prepare the evening meal I filled a saucepan with water for the rice, lit the gas, got distracted by a phonecall and returned to serve up only to find I had not put the rice in.

My husband reminding me, in a very loud voice, while shopping, that we needed a new Durex dish.

I've made it all the way to the supermarket not only in slippers, but not even a matching pair.

Getting a taxi home after a night out only to find myself outside the house I had moved from a year before.
And the taxi had driven off!

I'm spoilt for choice!
Popping into a shop, getting back into the car afterwards, putting my seatbelt on and only then realizing that the man in the driving seat wasn't my husband, and that I had got in the wrong car!

Couldn't find my purse and credit card - rang my daughter very tearfully who lives a few doors away to help me contact bank - she rushed round and had a quick look and found my purse in the freezer!! Well at least it was found lol

Ah, I once complained to the cashier that the automatic door was not working in Superdrug! She got up from her seat and kindly opened the door for me ....it wasnot automatic. !!!! In my defence, going in was automatic and as I had a stack of shopping, logic told me they would make it easy to leave the store. NO

I lived not too far from the supermarket which I used as my corner shop - called in from work one day in my car and then walked home - leaving the car in the supermarket car park. Wondered later where the car was!

Telling the GP I had had a "tubal litigation" - he roared with laughter.

I said to my daughter that whenever I go out shopping I see loads of youngsters taking ‘onesies’ on their phones!

After waking early and needing a brew, realized I had no milk. I threw on my clothes and slippers and walked out to corner shop . I decided to drag my bin out on the way. Realized halfway to the shop that I was still pulling the bin. I shoved it into someone's hedge and had to pick it up on the way back. That's what ya get for being half asleep.Bet no-one else takes their Wheelie bin for a walk haha

Thinking it was monday & on Tuesday I went to the spot where I meet my granddaughter after school on Mondays. She wasn’t there and I panicked. I saw another volleyball mum and asked “Was practice cancelled?” She started to answer but I immediately knew what was wrong. My granddaughter was on a away game, a Tuesday away game. It was Tuesday and not MONDAY! grrrr lol

With the shorter days I remember last winter when I had dozed off on the sofa and woke at eight o'clock thinking I was going to be late for work; of course it was eight at night but it did give me a start for a few minutes!

I will never forget the embarrassment when my mother announced that the store we were in was selling ‘shitted nylon feets”

Oh, where to start? I've never quite hit the giddy heights of my colleague's mum, who told me (and everyone else within earshot in the local post office) that her daughter had just been to the GP and had got "that HIV". I rang my colleague in shock - she'd been prescribed HRT.

But I've had my moments. As luck would have it, I reached into my bag for a tissue today and my hand emerged clutching a pair of white knickers. No, I have no idea. I'd be seriously worried if I hadn't always been dippy and didn't remember doing the exact same thing 30 odd years ago at a lunch out with the girls.