grandchild abroad

She is probably going through a phase where she is embarrased talking English. My daughter lived in Germany and was bringing up the children bi-lingual and found it very difficult once they went to kindergarten as they were immersed in German. In fact my granddaughter (she was about 5 at the time) told her Mum not to speak to her in English at Kindergarten. My grandson at one time spoke almost exclusively German but understood English. Now they live in Switzerland, are at a French speaking school, have many English speaking friends so their strongest language is English. Don't worry, your daughter will not forget her English, she will appreciate the fact that she can speak English, especially if it is a subject she learns at school. Just keep speaking to her and doing all the things you are doing at the moment. she will understand you although she obviously does not want to speak much English as the moment.

Thank you-you are right-she does seem embarrassed if I speak English in fron of her friends.One problem is that her parents want her to practise her English so ask me not to try Turkish with her!

I have two GC in Switzerland- their father is French and although they are supposed to speak English to their mother their first language is always going to be French. I would love to see them more frequently and Skype them often it is always bedtime or they are going out or friends there for brunch etc. The last time I phoned -my husband says not to as I get upset -my daughter sighed as she picked up the phone-I dont think she knew I could hear her. I am looking after them for two weeks in August and I hope they will not be strangers. I am not supposed to speak French to them but to get anywhere in the world today they should be fluent in English

stansgran you may have mistaken that the sigh from your daughter was directed at you, it may have been something that was happening in the household as she picked up the phone, dont take it too heart, I am sure she would hate to think that you were not contacting her because of a misunderstanding!

Your two weeks in the summer will re-establish your close releationship.

Just wait until they want to watch the films / TV & listen to pop music - so much of teenage culture is in English, they will then be the coolest kids in class!
Most bi-lingual children seem to go through "phases" & I guess that the Turkish gd is more anxious to be part of the Turkish crowd at the moment. There also seem to be times when the other language feels like "hard work" and other times when it flows.

A tip that you might find helpful and can be fun: my best friend is French, and although we both speak each other's language, when we really need a good natter, she speaks in French & I in English (it is easier to understand a foreign language than to speak in it).
Most bi-lingual families end up with "mash-up" words that become part of family vocabulary & with stories to go with them.

My first and only grandchild lives in the US with his mum and dad (my son). He has just had his first birthday and I will be honest and say that I felt very left out and upset knowing that he was surrounded by my son's friends and their children and my daughter-in-law's family. I rely on email and skype but my son's work and pro-sporting commitments mean that I am able to do this only at their convenience. Emails don't always get a response. My daughter in law isn't an overly friendly type so I don't feel able to ask her to take the skyping intiative. My husband and I are divorced and haven't been in contact for years (we are both remarried) so I can't share this problem with him. I feel so sad to be separated from my grandson and that I am not able to do all the grandparenty things that others do - even the simplest things. Language isn't a problem of course which is one good thing but does anyone else feel the same way and is there a workable solution?

I teach English as a second language and teens are notorious for being shy and lacking confidence in speaking English. Jackyann is quite right to point out that teen culture is Englishcentric so GC will ultimately'own' the language in front of their peers, but are likely to be inhibited when talking, especially on the phone. If at all possible, invite grandchildren to stay for two or more weeks - and preferably without parents - and you'll find that the language barrier crumbles.

bramblelady: you don't say what your financial / health situation is regarding travel, and the USA can be difficult / expensive for both.

We have had a few instances of keeping up with family & friends who live abroad & this is our strategy: ask if you can visit, but make it clear that you only expect to stay a short time with them (if there is no room ask for a B&B recommendation). Stay for 2-3 days, then go off to be a tourist, and come back for another 2-3 days.
During that time you can get a feel for the family's life, routine, interests etc. Then you will get an idea of how to organise a regular contact.
It may be less than you would like, but it will feel less intrusive - this family sound very busy!

One set of friends who were organising something like this were put in touch with a couple who wanted a house-sitter for 2 weeks. They were able to be near their son's family without intruding at all, but that was very lucky.