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Grandparenting

Pacifiers, dummies , binkys what ever you call them

(37 Posts)
dorsetpennt Mon 08-Aug-11 23:04:54

I had my children in the 1970's. At that time not so many babies in my group of friends had dummies, in fact it was quite frowned upon. Nowadays every other baby, including my GD, has one. She out grew hers by 9 months old and whilst it kept her content I certainly said nothing, though I was pleased to see it gone. Her parents did say that they would have 'weaned' her off it by a year at any rate. However, there does seem to be a lot of toddlers and a few times reception class children with a dummy full time in their mouths. I know it does mishapen the teeth in time but also their language skills. A friend says she can barely understand her GS with or without his dummy. He is so used to talking with it in his mouth that he still frames his words in the same manner as if a dummy was in situ. I've watched some of the Jo Frost Nanny programmes and she seems to feel that beyond say at least 18 months it should be gone. For the two reasons I've listed above. What are your opinions? Did you use them and it so for how long. Do your GC have them and does it concern you.

em Mon 08-Aug-11 23:09:55

I saw the Jo Frost programme where she tied the dummies up in a tree and asked the fairies to take them for little babies. Definitely twee but it seemed to work. My GS, at 2, still 'needs' one to sleep (as did his mum 35 years ago)but she gave it up with a bit of help and he will too, I'm sure. However his baby sister sucks her thumb and I see that as more of a problem - one I have not dealt with!

Joan Tue 09-Aug-11 06:13:34

Hate the things - never bought one. I liked to see my babies' faces too much, without them being spoiled by an ugly dummy. I found that talking to them face to face did all the 'pacifying' necessary, even as newborns.

numberplease Tue 09-Aug-11 12:06:13

I also hate them, never bought any for any of my 5 children, but all my grandchildren have had them. The youngest, just turned 3, still has his to go to sleep, although he can go to sleep without it, as has been proved on the odd occasion that they`ve forgotten to bring it here.

jangly Tue 09-Aug-11 12:14:15

I gave a dummy to each of my three. Babies need to suck and they sure as well weren't gonna do it all on me!

glammanana Tue 09-Aug-11 12:31:28

DS1 had a dummie,he had one in each hand and one in his mouth and if he
lost one during the night there was uproar,he hated a new one and I had to boil a new one nearly all day before he would use it,the other 2 DCs did not have one and my DDs children did not have one either.

lucid Tue 09-Aug-11 12:35:57

My MIL tried to give one to my DD when she was a baby ...even though I'd said I didn't want her to have one. DD promptly spit it out! grin
All my GC have had dummies though and my 2 eldest GD's have had to have braces for their teeth...because of the dummies?

Baggy Tue 09-Aug-11 13:59:23

DD3 will have to have a brace because she sucked her thumb. She was doing it less and less as she grew older and gave it up when the orthodontist told her she must, at age ten. I put a plaster on her thumb each night for a few weeks in case it went in when she was asleep. I had never tried to stop her when she was a baby because it saved a lot of bother. When she was put down in her cot for a sleep, the thumb went in and she conked out. So easy. Worth a brace, I reckon. It's dead cool to have a brace these days. wink

We did, of course, prepare DD for the idea of a brace years before the orthodontist said anything, as did our reguar dentist. Her teeth aren't bad in fact but a brace will improve them.

All in all, no big deal.

We have a wonderful picture of a baby orangutan sitting on its mum's shoulders, sucking its thumb. I wonder if babies of our other ape cousins do it too. Does anyone know?

jangly Tue 09-Aug-11 14:03:07

Each of my three gave the dummy up by three months. And went on to suck various fingers/thumbs. DS's thumb was longer and thinner on his right hand than on his left!

Libradi Tue 09-Aug-11 17:11:58

Both my children had dummies when they were tiny babies to help them sleep. My GD had one and gave hers up before she was three, she only really used it to go to sleep. I bought her a book by Jill Murphy called the last Noo- noo a funny story about a monster who didn't want to give up his noo noo (dummy). Not long after she gave hers away to the fairies.

I can't say I like the look of them but they did the trick and there was many any night I was so glad of a dummy.

I believe that they did some studies on cot deaths and actually recommend giving them to babies now.

GoldenGran Tue 09-Aug-11 17:18:35

Neither my children nor grandchildren had dummies, but daughter and GS had blankets,which they sucked and were difficult to get away from them to wash. My daughter then became a hair sucker, GS, just three and still with the gray remnants of "blankie". These are probably all better than thumbs or dummies but full of germs! My God daughter aged 25 has moved to Australia with the very last remnants of her blanket in her hand baggage!

jangly Tue 09-Aug-11 17:28:39

But the blankies do smell lovely. They smell of them. Shame to wash them.

I've still got the motif off of elder daughter's sleeping bag which served as her blankie for several years.

She is 42 now!

absentgrana Tue 09-Aug-11 18:01:21

Babies suck their thumbs in the womb.

HildaW Tue 09-Aug-11 19:31:51

Libradi.....The last Noo Noo is a brilliant book! but lost on my girls as they did not have them, I just never saw the need for them. I would feed them (boobs) until their eyes popped and put them to bed.....never any problems. Younger daughter had a well washed cot quilt that slowly got thinner and thinner, she loved the feel of it under her arms when I tucked her up in bed. All hell broke loose when it got washed for the last time and fell apart so I had to make her a patchwork quilt cover to replace it, shes still got it somewhere, I think it actually went to University!

Baggy Tue 09-Aug-11 20:05:25

grin, absent! My mother reckons I was born sucking my thumb! I was her easiest birth though, second of five.

harrigran Wed 10-Aug-11 14:44:56

I worked in ENT and saw the results of dummy sucking so never gave them to my children, I could spot a child who sucked a dummy by the shape of the dental arch. Slows speech development too.

jangly Wed 10-Aug-11 14:46:02

harrigran - you're probably not gonna like this

RUBBISH!

nanapug Wed 10-Aug-11 15:37:07

The mums are advised to use dummies now, as it has been shown to help prevent cot death in babies, but I love Jo Frost's way of getting rid of them at a sensible age.

jangly Wed 10-Aug-11 15:46:38

A properly designed dummy will not harm a child's teeth. Whether thumb sucking can do so is academic. You can't stop them doing that.

apricot Wed 10-Aug-11 20:49:22

I don't like dummies and all of my children sucked thumbs or fingers. None had crooked teeth, which are more often an inherited feature.
Now I have a grandchild who still has a bottle at 4. I don't like bottles either and never used them and can't bear to see this child walking around with a bottle of milk all day long. Of course she eats almost nothing. Her mother says she won't make an issue of it and she can eat whatever she wants, whenever she wants. Grrrrrr!

pinkprincess Thu 11-Aug-11 00:30:45

I hated dummies.My DS1 never had one, much to the disgust and unbelief of my MIL.Until then she thought it was impossible to care for a baby without one.Well I achieved the impossible, which annoyed her. She even told me I was depriving my baby of an essential item.
DS2 could scream for England, so I was driven by desparation to give him one.He would suck it for about a minute then spit it out in disgust when he realised there was no milk coming out of it.
All of my 5 grandchildren have had them.GD1 used to have two in her mouth, one at each side.She and GD2 have both needed braces, but then so did her father and his brother.
My DH remembers having a dummy until he started school.MIL would send him off in the morning with the dummy in his pocket, and the door key round his neck on a string, as she would be at work when he came home.One day his uncle came to visit, called him a sissy for having a dummy and threw it in the fire-resulting in a fall out between MIL and her brother.
Where I live dummies are sometimes called dum tits.

Faye Thu 11-Aug-11 04:39:15

I don't mind dummies but none of my children nor grandchildren have had them. Next granddaughter due in December is going to have one according to my daughter, it will be interesting to see how she goes. My daughter is going to try and have next baby sleeping in her cot with a dummy. My grandson slept most of the time in his parents bed and kept them awake for three years....smile He is a happy little boy though, so I guess whatever works. I do know that my youngest was the worst sleeper and didn't sleep in her own bed either but my older two did and were sleeping through the night at a very young age. I think its not so much the dummy but where they sleep. All were breastfed.

harrigran Fri 12-Aug-11 17:29:33

Why should I mind what you think jangly, you are entitled to your opinion. Like me you are probably speaking from experience and we speak as we find smile

bikergran Sat 13-Aug-11 07:38:40

My grandson had dummy up unitl 3 n half..... I didnt like it but he did. lol..like anything else..potty training etc they wil do it in their own time....he did have a secret stash of dummies.!! there seem to be one in every drawer, toy box and undr the bed...once he HE decided to give up they were never mentioned again....and yes his teeth are slightly crooked so in the very near future they will be a trip to the dentist!! hmm

jangly Sat 13-Aug-11 09:34:34

harrigran I could have put it nicer. blush