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Grandparenting

Exhausting grandchildren

(25 Posts)
janthea Tue 15-Nov-11 15:04:51

I have only just recovered from having my daughter, her husband and two sons (aged 4 and 2) to stay with me for a week. They live in Luxembourg so I don't see them as often as I would like. We managed to fit an awful lot into a short week. My daughter invited her school friends and university friends to come to lunch (on different days)!! I cooked!! We had a Halloween Party with fireworks and a Bonfire Party with fireworks. I cooked!! We went to the London Eye, the London Aquarium and Chessington Zoo. We shopped for all her Christmas presents and Christmas food ingredients she can't get at home. Her boys woke up every morning around 5.00am (the one hour time difference!!). My younger daughter and husband joined us for all the activities, together with their 2 year old daughter and they are expecting another one in four weeks (C section booked for 16 December - she has a heart complaint so it's a medical one). I missed them terribly when they left to go home - but - oh the peace and quiet!!! Bliss. My house looked as though a hurricane had hit it and it took quiet a while to sort out. I went back to work for a rest!! My house is now very, very quiet and, of course, I now wish they were back. One is never satisified with one's lot! sad

grandmaagain Tue 15-Nov-11 21:28:01

we are very lucky our GCs live close by and we see them regularlly however it does go quiet when they go home. for you seeing them so rarely it must seem an even bigger wrench when they go back. hope all goes well for the new baby thanks

lucid Wed 16-Nov-11 10:43:27

I empathise Janthea we love them to bits but they can be exhausting. Sounds like you had a brilliant time with them though. You've now got time to recover your energy before their next visit.
I've always said that a good thing about Grandchildren is that you can give them back! grin

janthea Wed 16-Nov-11 10:44:00

grandmaagain Thanks. Not long to go now.

HildaW Wed 16-Nov-11 10:51:55

janthea, I think most of us know this paradox. We love them to bits, want them to want to come, so always go all the way to make them feel welcome and then collapse in a puddle of exhaution. But hey ho! as long as we can bounce back for the next time they come! Roll on Christmas eh? grin

Gally Wed 16-Nov-11 11:22:50

Yes Janthea I can empathise - and how! We have had Daughter No.1 here for nearly 5 weeks with a 4 month old and a 20 month old. SIL was here too for the first 10 days with 2 older half brothers. Mr G and I are completely exhausted - not just physically but mentally shock. There has been no let up and the older one got a bug which has now gone on to his Mum and we are waiting for it to catch up with us which would be fine if I wasn't hosting a 70th birthday party for Mr.G on Saturday for 40 guests and a dinner for 23 in the evening. I am trying to sort out the house for this and everytime I turn round there's yet another toy waiting to break my leg or a baby bawling its head off and needing yet another nappy change!! I love them dearly but oh, how I wish they could live round the corner or even within an hour's driving distance instead of 450 miles away; after having Daughter No2 (from Oz) here in the summer for 5 weeks with her 3, I think the time has arrived for some 'me' time - however Christmas is on the horizon and Daughter No.3 will be here with, thankfully, only 1 child, but for 2 weeks.[exhausted smiley] !

janthea Wed 16-Nov-11 14:35:33

GALLY Tell me about it!! You are right - not just physical but mental. There is never any quiet After all, why speak when you can SHOUT!! And making ROARING noises all the time. And trying to watch anything on TV with the 4yr - the question 'why's he doing that' or 'what's that' and everytime you answer the question, another one comes along. But saying all this makes me realise how much I miss them. I'm lucky that my younger daughter only lives 5 minutes from me and I can see her and my grandaughter at weekends. And - I know someone will say differently - girls are much more calm than boys! It will be interesting to see whether she has another girl or whether it's a boy this time.

gracesmum Wed 16-Nov-11 19:53:47

Assuming "exhausting" is an adjective - is there any other sort?
If it means "how to...." I'm afraid I would have to be a lot younger! But it did sound like fun Janthea!!

Carol Wed 16-Nov-11 20:41:34

I have to reset my central heating, turn the phone back off mute, retrieve the remote control from the dog's basket, reset my cooker and washing machine, find my electric toothbrush and hope it's in the washing basket not down the toilet, take numerous plastic toys off the dog because she's found them in her bowl of water, put my knitting back on the needles, remove cookie dough from the back door where it was flung when we made cookies, and wipe up the water that was thrown all over the kitchen floor when four little hands 'helped' me wash the dishes.....another happy afternoon with my twin 3 year old grandsons.

absentgrana Wed 16-Nov-11 21:03:36

I do know how hard it is to look after, play with, read to, dance with, sing with generally care for grandchildren – and clear up afterwards – especially as we are none of us quite so young as we once were. However, spare a thought for those of us who yearn to build sandcastles, jump over waves, read bedtime stories, make cupcakes, push swings, plant carrot seeds and do a hundred ordinary day-to-day things but can't because we live on different continents. My eldest grandson will be ten in January and I have spent one Christmas and two birthdays with him – one of them the day he was born.

greenmossgiel Wed 16-Nov-11 21:08:23

Absent - thanks

Carol Wed 16-Nov-11 21:20:08

Absebtgrana I hope you do get chance to see more of your eldest grandson, and you have reminded me that I should never assume that my grandchildren's closeness is what every gran is enjoying. Having struggled to have contact with my 11 year old grandson for a few months this year, I can only begin to imagine what your yearning has felt like thanks

janthea Thu 17-Nov-11 11:14:34

carol When they had gone, I found a slice of toast under the rug and a crumpet down the back of my cream sofa! Toys keep turning up, even after an exhaustive search. Some were buried in the soil around my house plants. grin

absentgrana I know how you feel, but I suppose I'm lucky that one of my grandchildren (soon to be two!) live very close to me. I have to be satisfied with photos and phone calls for the other two. thanks

Annobel Thu 17-Nov-11 11:52:21

Lego has an uncomfortable tendency to turn up under one's bare foot - months after the GC have gone home. Where does it hide? confused

grannyactivist Thu 17-Nov-11 12:07:28

Grandson is on his way to stay for the next four days whilst his mummy gets a short 'recovery' break from the last few hectic weeks. Did you see my little treasure on Songs of Praise'? Not sure if the link will still work, but if you go to 23.03 minutes into the programme you'll see what a cutie he is. (If you can bear to watch The Soldiers singing the follow-on song he reappears for a minute or two. WARNING: you'll need hankies at the ready.)
www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b0179xmz/Songs_of_Praise_Remembrance_Sunday/

Carol Thu 17-Nov-11 12:43:00

Ohhhh! He's so gorgeous. That was him at the beginning of the programme as well, wasn't it?

absentgrana Thu 17-Nov-11 12:45:16

To all kind sympathisers I am planning a trip to New Zealand in March next year to be useful when grandchild number 5 (not to be called Chanel) puts in an appearance. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that all goes well and that he doesn't put in a massively premature debut like his elder sister and that I am there in time. Meanwhile, I am told that the other four children are counting the "sleeps" until I get there, although I doubt the three-year-old knows that many numbers. smile

grannyactivist Thu 17-Nov-11 18:37:55

Yes Carol he was on for a few seconds at the beginning of the programme too. I am of course completely unable to be objective about him, I think he's a great little chap. Right now he's playing a kazoo and making a lot of noise with that and his police car which has FOUR different siren sounds - all my own fault I'm afraid as I bought him the blasted things.
I love that first half hour after he goes to bed when I can just zonk out and ignore the chaos he's created. smile

Butternut Thu 17-Nov-11 18:48:48

absentgrana - I know exactly what you mean.

The closest I got to seeing my grandchildren was this year in May, otherwise it's had to be good old skype, and because my grandson is autistic it is very difficult, but we do have fun, after a fashion. My grand-daughter is only 18 months so usually looks quite startled with my antics!

Fingers crossed they will make it over for my other son's wedding here, in my garden, next June. I am counting the days....... smile

Butternut Thu 17-Nov-11 18:51:27

ps......I've often thought of starting a thread for 'skype' grandma's.....what do you think?

grannyactivist Thu 17-Nov-11 19:33:35

Butternut I think that's a lovely idea; so many of our grannies are away from their Grandchildren that a few skype tips and stories shared will be a boost I'm sure. smile

Carol Thu 17-Nov-11 20:19:44

Oooh, yes, I'd love to know how you use Skype and manage to maintain a long distance relationship.

janthea Fri 18-Nov-11 10:43:08

I just wish I could persuade my daughter to use Skype. Her excuse is that they are too busy to get out the computer and set it up!! Why!!! I've made her promise to try over Christmas.

Granny23 Sun 27-Nov-11 13:13:01

I have been listening to reports about Wednesday's strike and was surprised that no one mentioned the army of Grandparents who will undoubtedly be pressed into service as childminders for the day, as schools and nurseries close.
Our contibution to keeping the economy moving will yet again go unrecognised perhaps because we have no clout - I am sure there would be a very poor response to a strike call for GPs.

I was not looking forward to all 3 DGC, all day together chez nous. Other set of GPs, both retired teachers, have chosen this week to skip off to the Canaries! However it transpires that we will in fact have a day off as the school where one son-out-law works is closing for the day and the other SOL has booked the day off so that he is not forced to cover for striking workers. Hooray! We have yet to recover from 2 'in service' days last week.

Kiwibird Sat 03-Dec-11 06:31:34

I can sympathise totally with Absentgrana when it comes to the heartache of having grandchildren, in my case all five of them, living in different countries. Skype is good, and much better than nothing, but you can't beat the feeling of chubby arms around your neck. My grandchildren are getting older, like everybody's gchildren, but I could be so so useful to them I'm sure. Talk about frustrating! Missing the school plays and concerts and soccer on Saturdays is jolly heart-wrenching but well, it's the way of the world today with jobs taking people world-wide isn't it.