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Meeting the other grandparents.

(67 Posts)
Begaa23 Mon 02-Aug-21 23:32:46

Just wondering how many of you have never met the other set of grandparents and have no plans on meeting them ?

grannyactivist Tue 03-Aug-21 00:03:35

I have met all of the other grandparents, four sets of them, and I’m very glad to have done so. One couple I would now class as close friends and I have cordial relationships with the others.

I’m wondering what prompted the question Begaa23?

crazyH Tue 03-Aug-21 00:48:30

I have met all grandparents and have very cordial relationships with all of them, but their children ? That’s another matter?

Calendargirl Tue 03-Aug-21 06:36:00

I’ve met them all. One set are in Australia, so never see them, even when [sigh] we can go over there.

The other set live 20 miles away, last time we saw them was at a GC birthday party, about 10 years ago.

Grannynannywanny Tue 03-Aug-21 06:53:27

One set are a few miles away. DD&SIL invite us all to their house for birthday parties for the children etc and we all meet up on occasional outings eg a family trip to the zoo. Also we get together on Christmas Day.

The other set of grandparents are across the Irish Sea so less likely to see them apart from wedding day and christenings. But I do text my DIL’s mum and we exchange photos of the grandchildren.

Kim19 Tue 03-Aug-21 07:01:25

Cannot imagine not meeting the other GPs unless there was an obvious distance barrier. We do the usual communal GC birthday celebrations plus GMs meet for private lunch occasionally. Very enjoyable. Haven't managed one of these since Covid reared its ugly head, mind you.

tanith Tue 03-Aug-21 07:32:33

I have met some of them but not all some live a long way away and some abroad. I got on fine with those I have met.

Humbertbear Tue 03-Aug-21 07:47:52

We are very good friends with the other grandparents. We see them almost every week. We didn’t know them before our children moved in together bit we have become very close and are very supportive of each other. Fortunately there is a Yiddish word ‘machatenim’ which easily explains who they are when we refer to them in conversation.

Grandmabatty Tue 03-Aug-21 07:51:49

We meet up at birthdays and Christmas. My sil's father is an odious, bigoted man unfortunately so I tend to keep my mouth shut and gravitate to the kitchen.

Sara1954 Tue 03-Aug-21 08:09:57

One lot we are very good friends with, and have been for over twenty years now.
Our youngest daughters first in-laws, I speak to passing over our mutual granddaughter, but it’s tricky as their son is a vile scumbag. Her second one we have never met and never will, that relationship now thankfully being over!

Ladyleftfieldlover Tue 03-Aug-21 08:19:39

I met the other grandmother just once. Sadly she had Alzheimer’s and it was all very sad and difficult. She wasn’t really aware that she had a granddaughter but there are some lovely photos of the two of them. My granddaughter was only three when that grandmother died. She never knew the other grandfather either as he died many years ago.

Txquiltz Tue 03-Aug-21 08:26:39

Two sets of GP were alive when GC were born….one from each side of family. We were on foreign assignment until GS was 3 mos old. When we came home, there were many “directions” on proper care, etc. I bit my tongue and eventually the suggestions abated a bit. I felt like I was merely a backup GM. Suddenly, the other GM died! Through the years I have felt sad she missed so much. I have never regretted avoiding cross words with her even when tempted. Life presents so many twists and turns.

Cabbie21 Tue 03-Aug-21 08:33:11

I have met them several times, but only at the adult children’s homes. We never meet up separately. I would have liked to meet up more but it has never happened.

ginny Tue 03-Aug-21 08:40:13

DD1 only has a FIL We met him a few times but he has lived in Thailand for the last 6 years. We see DD3s In Laws at family dos and get on perfectly well.

Chewbacca Tue 03-Aug-21 08:47:49

I've become very close friends with DILs mum, we go out together regularly to theatre, cinema etc. Meeting up for lunch today actually. We also take our mutual GC, and her other GC, for days out altogether. It's been an unexpected bonus.

Sara1954 Tue 03-Aug-21 09:04:32

Chewbacca
Yes it’s lovely, we really like our oldest daughters in-laws, it’s been really nice to have had their company over the years at family occasions.
They are genuinely very nice people, we have been lucky.

timetogo2016 Tue 03-Aug-21 09:09:53

Yes iv`e met both sets and get on really well.
We meet up for lunch about 4 times a year,covid not withstanding.

Scentia Tue 03-Aug-21 09:14:15

I often speak to the GC other GM but my DH isn’t keen on the other GD, never has been, so I can’t see us being massive friends. My DD is very lucky to have wonderful in laws who will do anything for her and the children.

M0nica Tue 03-Aug-21 09:23:47

Another who has the happiest relation with the other grandmother. There is only one other grandparent, as only one AC is married and DDil's mother has been a widow for over 40 years.

For us both families have bonded as one, we refer to each other as family and act on it. She lives 200 miles away in the same town as DS and his wife, her daughter.

We stay with her when we visit, although, obviously we haven't visited now for 18 months. We have been on holiday together and we have wlecomed her to stay with us. During lockdown we have been in touch regulalry

Redhead56 Tue 03-Aug-21 09:48:25

Met one granddad few times only he lives abroad where the wedding took place. His wife lives a mile away from us we see her regular she is at my DS house most days.

Other grandparents who live about forty miles from us also live separately met grandad a few times. We have seen grandma quite a lot and keep in touch with her as we text each other and do occasionally meet up.

Callistemon Tue 03-Aug-21 10:28:13

Chewbacca

I've become very close friends with DILs mum, we go out together regularly to theatre, cinema etc. Meeting up for lunch today actually. We also take our mutual GC, and her other GC, for days out altogether. It's been an unexpected bonus.

Same here with the one who lives in this country, Chewbacca.

We see the overseas ones whenever we manage to get out there, usually go out for a meal and a catchup with them. Other Grandma and I message each other sometimes.

Begaa23 Tue 03-Aug-21 12:12:04

Many thanks all ??

JackyB Tue 03-Aug-21 13:45:20

Why do you ask, Begaa? Are you about to become a grandparent? Do you want to avoid the other side of the family? If so, why? And, come to that, how?

Kim19 Tue 03-Aug-21 14:10:35

Cabbie21, I note you saying you would like to have met up more but it just hasn't happened. Well, somebody has to instigate it. Why not you? Could be the start of some real fun times. I certainly enjoy mine.

Begaa23 Tue 03-Aug-21 20:01:49

Son and Partner just had DGD who is perfect just we have mentioned a few times we should really meet her dad and stepmum ( no mum involved) this was well before baby born , I messaged on facebook saying we should really meet up at least 5 times and nothing is even said no yes or no when mentioned .mentioned to son and he doesnt seem to think its an issue that both sets of grandparents never meet . When his partner was in labour i did message and say could I phone and have quick chat trying to push things forward a touch but she said she was busy and thats as far as it went .They only live an hour n half away and seem ok but other than facebook i have no idea of address or any other way to get in contact , so was just asking if it was a normal thing seems not . Thank you all