Gransnet forums


Black Dog Gang 4

(659 Posts)
Anniebach Mon 19-Aug-19 21:46:12

Hi, new thread x

SalsaQueen Sat 19-Oct-19 11:15:54

all of you I hope your day is going well.

Annie So glad you are going to get a handrail fitted, you've had to wait for ages for that.

Nanny Marshall is gorgeous. I think pets know when we need a cuddle.

MaggieTulliver Please speak to a doctor. Depression is terrible, and we on here have all felt at rock bottom at times. It can be managed, though.

Nonnie Sat 19-Oct-19 11:37:38

Good to read all your positives. I don't have one today, feeling negative.

Flutterby1 Sat 19-Oct-19 16:43:58

Hi friends. A little question to ask.
Have any of you lovely people read books or attended workshops by The Speakmams?
I have known about
Them for sometime but never had the chance to attend a workshop, I have tuned into their many you tube posts. They seem to have helped many people.

KatyK Sat 19-Oct-19 16:59:10

I've only seen The Speakmans on daytime TV. They seem to have remarkable success curing phobias. I don't know how they treat other problems. I have thought of buying their new book Conquering Anxiety.

Flutterby1 Sat 19-Oct-19 17:21:02

Yes I am thing of buying the book too Katy.

Joce345 Sat 19-Oct-19 22:02:20

Just had a quick look at the Speakmans looks interesting will look into it more thank you for that.

Nite night all sleep well 💤

MaggieTulliver Sun 20-Oct-19 07:38:26

Morning everyone, what do you all have planned? I’ not seeing anyone socially but will take a long walk with Alfie (my quirky little JRT) and read (as well as a trip to Sainsbury’s).

SalsaQueen, I’ve been to see my GP many times about my anxiety/depression but we seem to have run out of options. The only drug I haven’t tried is Mirtazapine, because I’m worried about the weight gain. Is anyone on it to good effect? Maybe to not be so anxious and overweight would be better....

grapefruitpip Sun 20-Oct-19 08:54:27

Maggie, could the little woofer provide a point of contact with other people?
Doggy cafe's and so on, seem to be very fashionable.

Anniebach Sun 20-Oct-19 10:49:13

Hi all x

Maggie, when you say ‘overweight’ are you thinking ofgoing up a size or much more ?

KatyK, if you buy the book do let us know your opinion on it

Salsa yes the hand rail this week, feel anxious about stepping outside but it has to be done , first steps to overcoming the agoraphobia.

I will do the daily crosswords, killer Sudoku etc as usual .
My younger daughter is on holiday in Dubai, I miss our chats at 11.00 in the mornings . Because I don’t leave the house hers is the only voice I hear in a day, well except for tv but not the same as a chat is it ?

whywhywhy Sun 20-Oct-19 10:55:58

Is this the site for helpful advice? I have battled depression on a daily basis and try and keep off medication but I think the time has come to seek some help. I have had a bad past, battered wife etc and there are days when I just want to be on my own and others when I want people to be around. I could scream today because I hate sundays! Any words of advice even though I probably know I have to go along to the drs. Thank you for reading x

Anniebach Sun 20-Oct-19 11:09:01

Hello whywhywhy

We all have problems with depression, anxiety etc. We share,
listen and understand.

This is the 4th Black Dog thread, over this time many have said they don’t like Sundays .

See your GP, ask for help and we are here x

KatyK Sun 20-Oct-19 11:09:54

Yes I will Annie

whywhywhy Sun 20-Oct-19 11:18:59

Thank you Anniebach. I am seriously considering seeing the dr this week as it is getting worse and I don't feel like I have any joy for life at all lately and just want to sit and cry. Also my little best friend, my cat is poorly - maybe it has rubbed off on her, but she is 20 years old. Thanks. x

Nonnie Sun 20-Oct-19 11:21:28

MT I read somewhere that Mirtazapine is not recommended for older people. Of course I am not implying you are old! Perhaps you could discuss that aspect with your GP.

annie if you only step out to the handrail that will be a start. I think in most areas of our life we just need to take one small step and have very small goals. Also not beat ourselves up when we fail, just come back and try again.

WWW yes of course you will get advice on here and it will all be intended to help. It may or may not help you but I'm sure a chat with your GP will help you decide if meds are appropriate or not. You would take meds if you had a serious infection, if your depression is serious then there is no difference.

Don't know if this will help anyone: I set myself very small goals and congratulate myself when I achieve them. I can't go into detail on here but will give one example. Depending on what I hope my height is and what it may have gone down to I am either 2 lbs overweight or 8 lbs according to the BMI charts. My current target is those 2 lbs, then I will have to get to the next stone, not far, after that it will be the weight I was for a special occasion and then the rest of the 8 lbs. Very, very small steps as the big ones can be too difficult to think about. Yesterday I nibbled whatever came to hand, too many oatcakes! I am not beating myself up about it, just try harder today.

I have got my outstanding paperwork down to one major task (would have been a minor one a few years ago) and look forward to ticking that one off. I have cut back one area of the garden and am not beating myself up about the rest, I will do it or I won't. If I looked at all my tasks as the big things they are I would never even start them, just a little at a time and I will get there. No physical issues in my case, lack of motivation is my problem.

MaggieTulliver Sun 20-Oct-19 12:42:09

WWW, you’re amongst people who know how you feel. Do you live on your own? I’m the same, sometimes want to be on my own all day and others craving company. Please see your doctor and get the balk rolling. And I’m sorry about your little cat, mine is very old too and such a sweet presence.

Grapefruit, yes woofer’s a great way to meet people and I’ve made some nice friends that way. Annie, I find having the radio on is good company, even if it’s just in the background. Nonnie, good advice about tackling tasks, I find a lot of things really daunting and even the thought of going shopping is making me super-anxious. I feel I just want to hibernate today....

whywhywhy Sun 20-Oct-19 13:03:56

Thank you.

Flutterby1 Sun 20-Oct-19 15:18:24

Hi friends. You are getting good advice here why why why.
I was ok this morning and after lunch went out to get some bits and bobs. Was looking around few shops but not really in the mood. Ended up coming back home ate bag of crisps while the tears were running down my face. Why? Still have this family problem lurking which has no quick fix. Going to try whar Dr Claire Weekes suggests in looking at the problem from a different perspective. Think I am also worrying about Christmas which I was looking forward to but not so much now. Tears gone now. Think I might have a cup of tea.

grapefruitpip Sun 20-Oct-19 15:20:46

Nobody gets a medal for " staying off" medication.

Would you say to a diabetic " Well done, you have managed without".

Please folks, no need to suffer more, see a good GP.

Nonnie Sun 20-Oct-19 16:50:23

A positive (I think). Had a call from DS who was doing something difficult physically when he 'hit a wall'. He was listening to random music when suddenly a song came on which reminded him strongly of his dead brother and he felt his brother was pushing him on to complete. He finished in a park and heard loud music playing the song which was played at the end of his brother's funeral. He said people look for things like this but he hadn't believed it. Now he is firmly convinced his brother was 'with him' and encouraging him to finish. We all cried but it was comforting also.

SalsaQueen Sun 20-Oct-19 18:13:41

MaggieTulliver Mirtazapine certainly increases the appetite, particularly, I found, for bread and other starchy foods. I gained about 10lbs, (but I'm overweight anyway)but I keep active by doing Zumba, aqua aerobics and Salsa dancing. I would far rather be overweight without depression than suffering! I haven't heard about Mirtazapine being unsuitable for older people - I'm 60 and have been on it for about a year.

whywhywhy Don't try to cope with it without medication. Depression and anxiety are very real illnesses and often need medical help. I understand about your little cat. I've always had cats. My 18 yr old cat was put to sleep 18 months ago, after various health problems. Your little one is really elderly, but you must have looked after her well, for her to have lasted all this time.

Anniebach I hope you manage, with the handrail, to get outside for a while. Yes, a voice on the telephone is very different to listening to the tv and radio. Have you ever thought about Crossroads Care or similar? A friend of mine does voluntary work for AgeUK and she visits people in their homes, just for a chat and cup of tea, for an hour or 2, once or twice a week.

nanny2507 Sun 20-Oct-19 20:19:04

nonnie how lovely that your ds "heard* his brother and was led by him xxxx

nanny2507 Sun 20-Oct-19 20:22:40

I have felt good this last 2 days. Had a beautiful video call with my gd yesterday morning showing me her dinosaur pictures and telling me what they were called. Seeing my daughter on Tuesday I cant wait. Then the following week I see my gd the absolute reason I wake every day. Xx

Doodle Sun 20-Oct-19 22:01:35

whywhywhy welcome. Yes we all struggle on this thread. Some good days some bad. I too think you should see a GP if you are feeling so bad. Medication may help.
nonnie that’s a lovely post.😊
Had a bit of a lazy day today just doing puzzles and reading the paper. Might have an early night and read a book for a bit.
Sleep well all 💕

Nonnie Mon 21-Oct-19 11:05:31

Thanks nanny & Doodle

Seems like things are looking up a bit for you nanny.

Doodle thanks for that post, I really struggle on days when I can't 'achieve' so it is good to hear that someone else has lazy days.

nanny2507 Mon 21-Oct-19 19:20:43

nonnie I am trying so hard to stay positive. Tank is still on my mind every single day..and i mean everyday. I need to move as when i am away from this place i can think of him and just tuck it away but as soon as i get close to home the tears start as it is where he was stolen from and i just cant forget that.

Anniebach Mon 21-Oct-19 21:34:12

Hi all x

nonnie I do think your two sons connected x

Salsa I will contact Age Cymru, I will need company getting use to the hand rail. How are you ? X

nannie still no further with moving house ?

flutterby do read Claire Weekes books, x

The hand rail is being fitted tomorrow ! legs so weak will have to try just a few steps and build up, it’s the start of beating the wretched agoraphobia.

53 years ago today at 9.30am I experienced my very first panic attack ! only help then was the tranquilizers, thank heaven things are moving on from those things

SalsaQueen Mon 21-Oct-19 22:02:01

Anniebach I hope you get on OK., both with the Age Cymru and with the handrail. I'm OK, thanks, a bit fed-up of this bladder problem (overactive bladder) but am being referred to a Urologist. Weeing 25 times a day (I kid you not)is seriously tedious.

Anniebach Mon 21-Oct-19 22:08:29

Salsa, 25 times ? Do you get much sleep ?

Flutterby1 Mon 21-Oct-19 22:42:18

Hi Anniebach I have a book by Dr Claire Weekes that I refer to. I think she sure was before her time. One amazing, clever lady. There are lots of Dr Claire Weekes post on you tube. Would recommend folks to have a listen to them.
Hope all goes well with hand rail tomorrow and let’s hope it is a nice sunny day for you - sending you positive thoughts.
Night night all x

Doodle Mon 21-Oct-19 23:19:03

annie even though it was so long ago, the Aberfan disaster brings back memories of such shock and horror. More so for you being so close. Such a sad day.
nonnie there is nothing wrong with lazy days if you can just relax. If I find my mind is dwelling on things it shouldn’t, I spend a little time in prayer and then get up and do something to distract myself.
nanny I really hope you can get some relief from this pain you are suffering at the moment. Are you anywhere near moving yet?
salsa you poor girl you must be worn out. I hope you get help with your problem soon.
I will have a listen to YouTube flutterby thanks for the suggestion.
Take care all of you x

Doodle Mon 21-Oct-19 23:33:51

Just read the Aberfan thread and found out about the flowers you send annie. What a lovely gesture. Thank you 💕

SalsaQueen Tue 22-Oct-19 16:43:50

Annie and Doodle I get up about 4 times every night, so my sleep is always broken. I'm sick of it, to be honest. I've had this problem for about 12 years or more. It makes life awkward, as wherever I go, I'm constantly wondering where the toilets are. Never mind, there are worse problems to have, and I know how lucky I am with so many things.

Nonnie Tue 22-Oct-19 17:22:16

nanny I think I understand that. Are you a position to move? Can you wait until it has been a year? We are advised not to make important decisions too soon after bereavement.

I haven't heard anything about Dr Weeks so will put looking it up on my todolist. Motivation is my issue most days.

annie you recognise that your muscles will be week so perhaps you can start with a few simple stretches? Maybe moving your ankles more than normal and then whatever muscle group you feel you can. This situation has to be slow to improve, little by little. I know from experience how easy it is to overdo it and cause damage so please take it gently.

Just been out for a very long lunch with some old friends. It made me feel fit and young because she has so much wrong with her and even needs help cutting up her food. We left the restaurant with her on her walker and she fell over. She said she had hurt her shoulder and hip but wouldn't go to hospital. A couple of young guys drove up and lifted her into her wheelchair for which we were very grateful. When I see someone like her I do feel grateful for what I have.

Salsa sounds difficult.

Doodle not sure I relax on lazy days, always feel I should be achieving something, that is why I envy you. Most days I just can't wait for bedtime. Got a day tomorrow when I don't have to do anything and then 'gird my loins' for a difficult day on Thursday.

Flutterby1 Tue 22-Oct-19 17:24:07

Hi friends.
Annie did you get the hand rail fixed up? I also read the Aberfan thread - what a thoughtful lady you are Annie - thank you also from me.
Have wee question folks. If you are not doing anything does this make you bit Anxious/restless ? with bit of a butterfly /churny tum perhaps? What do you do?

Anniebach Tue 22-Oct-19 17:56:50

Hi all x

Glad you liked me sending the flowers I wish I could have taken them but perhaps next year, I haven’t been home since the agoraphobia kicked in. Even after all these years walking through the memorial garden bring such mixed feelings, how happy I was going to that school, how I felt as I watched little bodies being carried out from the same school.

*Salsa, poor you, how uncomfortable, and such broken sleep.

flutterbye yes Dr Weekes was ahead of her time, she has helped so many.

nonnie I see a physiotherapist who has given me exercises, muscles are very wasted.

The hand rail was fitted this morning, it is too big for my twisted hands to grasp! grrrrrr

SalsaQueen Tue 22-Oct-19 18:11:37

Anniebach Yes, it's a real nuisance. Oh no, the handrail is too big? Will the council be able to change it or alter it in some way?

Anniebach Tue 22-Oct-19 21:42:12

I feel rather down Salsa, I keep trying to overcome the agoraphobia, bought Fred, arranged for someone from the Red Cross to accompany me out on Fred to gain confidence, then my brother said he was to busy to finish building the shelter for me to park Fred in.

Waited months for the hand rail , to big for my hand to hold onto it.

Will keep trying though, don’t know how yet needs some thought

SalsaQueen Tue 22-Oct-19 22:27:29

Anniebach Oh, that's sad, Annie. Is there anyone else who could build the shelter? Any voluntary group that might be able to help? I hope something gets done about the handrail - I assumed they'd all be the same size, but perhaps the council can give you a smaller one?

Anniebach Tue 22-Oct-19 22:34:05

Can’t afford to pay builders Salsa, I was paying my brother by working without pay.

I will ask about the hand rail, if they can change it ? How long would it take them, they certainly don’t rush 😀

Doodle Tue 22-Oct-19 23:22:31

Oh annie I don’t believe it. You waited all this time and the rails too big. That’s ridiculous. Hope you can get it changed.
salsa my DH is up many times every night with overactive bladder. He gets so tired. I am sorry you have this too.
nonnie hope your Thursday goes ok. I was going to type try not to worry about it tomorrow but then I know how hard it is not to worry when something is on your mind. I think we all long for bed sometimes just to go to sleep and forget our troubles for a bit.
flutterby if I have something on my mind that is causing me to worry then it takes over a bit. I try not to think about it but it is very difficult if it is causing me concern and on those occasions I have the dodgy tum, heart beating too much and my mind won’t calm down. I think we are all like that when we have worries.

grapefruitpip Wed 23-Oct-19 08:40:58

Hows the idea of the advocate progressing? Maybe they could deal with some of this?

Nonnie Wed 23-Oct-19 09:59:23

annie grrr, how ridiculous to fit an unsuitable hand rail. Time for strong words.

Salsa poor you, I think I go to the loo in the middle of the night just because I'm awake, don't think it is my bladder waking me.

Doodle thanks, not sure what to call my feelings as the time approaches. It has taken us so long to get to this stage and I might simply feel relief when it is done. Sometimes we just have to try to climb the hill to prove to ourselves we have done all we could. Sorry to be cryptic, good reasons why.

flutter yes, I don't understand why some people think we can turn off our thoughts, I certainly can't turn off mine. I can't stop worrying about some things and, I admit, I sometimes have vengeful thoughts but I would never do anything about them. I would like to be a better person but I can't help my thoughts, just my actions.

Onwards and upwards all.

Anniebach Wed 23-Oct-19 10:10:15

Hi all x

The advocate not calling for another 2 - 3 weeks.

Having new flooring fitted in the hall this morning, just had message from younger granddaughter who was coming to move things from hall and help me with opening doors etc,
she has a part time job to help funds , she is at university,she can’t get day off.

Be back later , x

grapefruitpip Wed 23-Oct-19 12:03:06

That's really great though Annie if somebody can speak up for you and support you. Shame about the wait.

Nonnie Thu 24-Oct-19 11:24:18

Hi all, Please, if you pray, pray for me this afternoon from 2pm. If not please just send me good vibes, I need help so much. Thought I was coping but have fallen apart this morning at the thought of the meeting I have to go to.

Anniebach Thu 24-Oct-19 11:49:16

Hi all x

nonnie you will do it, you have I am sure every good reason for doing it, good luck, my thoughts and prayers are with you x

They didn’t fit the flooring yesterday, they are now coming today , physiotherapist calling this after noon, she raises my stress levels .

Be back later

Dawn22 Thu 24-Oct-19 19:18:09

Hoping you got through the difficulty you had today Nonnie. Take care and blessings from me to you. X

Well done Annie for being so truly patient. Not easy at all. X

Dawn xx

Doodle Thu 24-Oct-19 22:52:55

nonnie I am praying that you got through today and hope it wasn’t as bad as you thought. I pray you sleep tonight and get some peace.
Hope the flooring goes well annie and the physio.
Sleep well all x

nanny2507 Fri 25-Oct-19 11:53:28

Hello friends. annie how annoying re handrail. Hope everyone else is doing well xxxx
I have taken my bungalow off the market. Nothing is happening so it's pointless. I will re address in ybe new year. Xxx

Nonnie Fri 25-Oct-19 16:11:34

Thanks for the prayers. It was very difficult but there is some light possible at the end of a very long tunnel. It is going to be a very rough and expensive road but we think it is worth it. Expert advice is that we are doing the right thing and are justified in doing it. Once again, sorry I cannot say more. Now I am totally exhausted and need a few days to get myself up and running.

Have a good weekend all.

SalsaQueen Fri 25-Oct-19 20:14:42

* All of you* I hope you've all managed to have a decent day, what with the various problems.

I've got an appointment to see a Urologist, next Tuesday, so I'll be glad to see if any different treatment can be offered. I'm sick of this stupid bladder!

Hope you all have a restful weekend.

GabriellaG54 Fri 25-Oct-19 20:25:28

We can have a pretty good guess without having it spelled out. Leastways, I can.

Doodle Fri 25-Oct-19 21:24:33

nonnie hope you get some sleep tonight. Sounds a rough time.
Good news about the appointment salsa hope they can do something to help.

Anniebach Fri 25-Oct-19 21:25:53

Hi all x

nanny good idea to wait until early Spring for selling ? x

nonnie you are exhausted but you did it x

Salsa all the very best for the Tuesday appointment x

I am having new handrail next week

A peaceful weekend to all,

Anniebach Fri 25-Oct-19 21:26:43

Hi Doodle how are things my love ? X

Doodle Fri 25-Oct-19 21:34:51

Hi annie I’m ok thanks. Trying to keep myself on an even keel and not overthinking things. Easier said than done sometimes 😊.
So glad they are coming back next week to do your handrail. Hopefully this time it will be the right size. Early night for me tonight and a read in bed I think.
How are you getting on with audible annie? Have you found any good books to listen to? I find reading a good distraction. A good book can be a blessing.
Hope you sleep well tonight x

Anniebach Fri 25-Oct-19 21:57:09

Doodle I am enjoying the audio books, got taken back to school days , my mother and I use to enjoy reading books together, a chapter in turn, I listened to Rebecca, it was so comforting to remember us curled up on the sofa and reading.

Now I am listening to ‘Far From The Madding Crowd’.

Doodle Fri 25-Oct-19 23:22:05

Oh annie I loved that as a film. I think Terrence Stamp was the dashing one and I thought he was so handsome but not a nice character. Hope you enjoy it.

Nonnie Sat 26-Oct-19 10:21:51

Good luck Salsa glad you don't have long to wait.

Let's hope they get the handrail right this time annie

Doodle 'even keel' forgotten what that looks like! As soon as my wobbling reduces something comes back and pushes it hard again. Hope you succeed.

Yes, did sleep last night, took a pill but still struggling today. I just have to accept that it will take a few days to get back to where I was this time last week. Thanks all.

Persisting with rain here so planning to hide on my sofa with the radio later while DH watches men doing silly things with balls. Sorry to all those who like it, my sport requires much smaller balls!

Joce345 Sat 26-Oct-19 15:32:39

Nonnie interested to know what sport you like with small balls.

Anniehope you are ok..

Just been shopping and seriously thinking how much better I would be with web feet haha

Hope every one has a good weekend ..

Nonnie Sat 26-Oct-19 15:38:23

Cricket and tennis Joce particularly cricket when at the ground, not so good on TV. Haven't done any sport for a long time!

Dawn22 Sat 26-Oct-19 18:42:11

Just to remind everyone that Sir David Attenborough's Seven Planets, One World is on BBC1 tomorrow evening at 6.15pm. These programmes are interesting to watch and a very good distraction.
Real life is not always a walk in the park for us humans as we know well on this thread. Being in nature alongside music and art are some of the good things that life has to offer.
Take care everyone and thinking of you.
Dawn xx

Dawn22 Sat 26-Oct-19 18:45:59

Annie and Doodle
Thank you for the audio suggestions. I have been listening to Far from the Madding Crowd.
All the best from Dawn xx.

SalsaQueen Sun 27-Oct-19 00:19:53

Annibach Thank you. I hope you get on well with the new handrail when you get it. x

Doodle Thanks. Best wishes to you too x

Nonnie Thank you. All the best to you x

Nonnie Sun 27-Oct-19 10:24:37

Nothing much to say but the sun is shining on my garden and I am enjoying the autumn colours. Hope to get out and prune the acers this week when I feel up to it. Then it will just be tidying up for the winter.

Doodle Sun 27-Oct-19 22:13:51

Hello annie, everyone. Early night for me tonight as early start in the morning. Don’t know if I’ll drop off but I hope so as I didn’t sleep much last night.
Hope you are all ok and wish you all a good night. Sleep safe x

Joce345 Mon 28-Oct-19 09:25:30

Morning all, how as everyone’s weekend gone, do hope you have all had a peaceful one...

Nonnie Mon 28-Oct-19 09:36:35

Joce not much went on here this weekend apart from DH 'fixed' the burglar alarm which has never worked. He put new batteries in every sensor, sent DS up a ladder to change the batteries in the box. Magic moment, switched it on and the loudest noise!!!! Thought he had switched it off as no sound in the house but didn't realise it was still going off outside. Frantic doorbell ringing and two lots of very concerned neighbours. Eventually nice man from next door found how to switch it off, explained what he thought the problem was but if not to ask his wife to Google. Bless him we had got the instructions from Google but of course DH hadn't read them. grin I suggested we still had one stage to go before actually reading the instructions - percussive maintenance! DH said he had done that so it looks like the instructions now. We all saw the funny side.

Watch this space for when he fixes the front door lock grin

I hope that put a smile on your faces for a few minutes, I'm still smiling now.

Joce345 Mon 28-Oct-19 11:40:58

Nonnie that certainly put a smile on my face, that is my husband all over just the sort of think he would do..
Hope this put another smile on you face. My husband can’t hold a drill so I thought I would have a go Yessss brilliant with it. Then my daughter said mum I bet that hole has gone though to the other room nooo said me, next thing she was on the floor in laughter, I had gone all the way though. Well who give some one that no nothing about a dill, a drill bit that long.. not to worry I can always put a picture over the hole in the other room hehe, have my kids and brothers give me some stick over it but all in good fun.. I have told them they know where to come if they need any drilling doing haha good to laugh.. ask if I could borrow a still saw haha the answer I got was NO WAY, wonder why.

Nonnie Mon 28-Oct-19 12:08:07

joce nothing ventured..............................! I have just come in from doing a 'chain saw massacre', well actually a hedge trimmer but it is just as therapeutic. Just one more bush to go but DH needed me in the house so I expect I will put it off for another day now. Today he is replacing the front door lock, oh dear, think I will leave the side gate unlocked and keep the back door key in my pocket grin

Joce345 Mon 28-Oct-19 13:05:52

Haha yes could be a good idea that Nonnie,
chainsaws saw now that sounds good, wonder if I could use one ummm... I know I’m a wizz with the drill now so could give it a go.
Like you said nothing ventured 🤭😀

Anniebach Mon 28-Oct-19 21:20:13

Hi all x

Sorry not been on today. I thought I would keep my mind extra busy this week, not great idea, I am sooooo tired x

Had two more requests to do more family trees, that’s five I have taken on. Good to have something to work on but will
work for less hours in a day x

Joce345 Mon 28-Oct-19 21:40:23

Hi Annie, hope you not doing two much, don’t what to be doing do much and make your self poorly .
When do you get your new hand rail Annie do hope it works for you so you can at least get up your path, small steps.

Nonnie Tue 29-Oct-19 10:07:35

annie good to have something to get your teeth into as you are not able to do physical things.

Joce I will continue the saga so you can have another laugh. DH bought new front door lock, lots of 'percussive maintenance', I shut the doors between us, no lock on front door since yesterday. Fortunately the porch has a good lock. My suggestions did not go down well, hiding today grin

Flutterby1 Tue 29-Oct-19 17:11:13

Hi friends I have not posted for wee while however I need to ask a question that I have asked before. It’s for a bit of reassurance.
I get this knot in my tummy when I feel anxious but I also seem to have it at other times it seems to be there when I think I feel ok. It gets me down as it really unsettles me.
Trying to get a grip on these anxiety feelings.
As Dr Claire Weekes says ‘accept all feelings and they will become insignificant’ not easy and will not happen overnight.
Please let me know what you do with the knot in your tum.
Thanks all x

Joce345 Tue 29-Oct-19 20:07:51

Nonnie I do hope you have held onto the back door key🤣🤭

Flutter I always had the knot in my tummy feeling anxious or not, but I do think they go hand in hand hope you feel better soon.

Annie how’s your family tree work going ..

Joce345 Tue 29-Oct-19 21:58:36

Night all sleep well 💤

Anniebach Tue 29-Oct-19 22:07:42

Hi all x

flutterby , it’s tension , when we are anxious we tense up, neck, shoulders, stomach, any part of the body, when we are calm the neck and shoulders relax but that tension in the stomach does hang around, it’s the centre isn’t it, we get excited , shocked, anxious and the stomach gets it, horrible feeling but it will not harm. Not easy to carry on and ignore the knot but it does ease x

Joce, done anymore drilling ? I could do with you and your drill for an hour 😀

I have been researching all day, a difficult week for me, thoughts I can control the rest of the year flood in. So spend all day and evening researching.

Hope everyone is ok x

Flutterby1 Tue 29-Oct-19 22:36:26

Joyce and Annie thanks for your words. It helps to know that someone knows exactly what I mean. I do find it hard to go about my day to day business when the knot is bothersome but I do try. Seems to be my anxiety weak spot.
Annie I hope things will not be too hard on you this week.
Thanks again. Hope you have a good nights sleep. X

Grannmarie Tue 29-Oct-19 22:36:52

Good evening, I have followed this thread for a wee while, first time posting here, you are wonderfully supportive to one another.

Flutterby1, I try Rescue Remedy spray for that anxious feeling, I find it quite helpful.

I remember reading Dr Claire Weekes' book 'Self help for your nerves' in the 90s, and I have just downloaded it to my kindle for a 'refresher course', 99p on Amazon.

Anniebach Tue 29-Oct-19 22:42:09

Welcome *Grannmarie , I use Rescue Remedy, even gave it to my daughters and grandchildren for exams .

Hope you find the book helpful, such sound advice

Doodle Tue 29-Oct-19 22:42:19

flutter have you got something at the back of your mind that’s worrying you? That could easily be the reason for the knot in your stomach.
nonnie and joce thank you for the funny DIY stories 😀
annie keeping your mind busy at this time is a good idea but don’t work so much you wear yourself out. Take care x

Joce345 Tue 29-Oct-19 23:38:06

Welcome Grannmarie yes some lovely people on hear always some comfort and kind words stay with us...

Annie no more drilling as yet but have still got some to do, also a few holes to fill 🤣 but definitely got very good at hanging thing pictures and the like now .. I am hear to help anyone free of course, Must have plenty of filler hehe.

Grannmarie Wed 30-Oct-19 01:07:41

Thank you for the welcome, night, night.

sharon103 Wed 30-Oct-19 01:34:36

I'm so pleased to see that after such a long time you are finally having a handrail fitted. A pity though that you didn't have it during the warmer months.
I haven't read the posts on the thread for such a long time. It's popped up on the discussions tonight so just popped in to say hello. I must have a catch up on the posts.
Love to you and everyone. xxxxx

Nonnie Wed 30-Oct-19 09:12:00

Flutter I get it but not all the time. If I knew how to stop it I would tell you but it just comes. I think I probably had a panic attack yesterday, can't think how else to describe it, went on for quite a long time. The trigger was such a small thing but I was completely wiped out.

Joce filler? Yes please. Still don't have a front door lock and now have a gaping hole on the side of the doorway. Himself has decided that using the same key as before will not look right so I have to go into town today and get 4 extra keys cut. I will then have to go and explain to the 4 people who have keys. Hey ho, sunny day so will walk.

Doodle Wed 30-Oct-19 13:04:35

granmarie so sorry I didn’t post a welcome to you last night I must have missed your post somehow.
nonnie hope you are ok today.

Joce345 Wed 30-Oct-19 17:57:27

Nonnie yes sunshine hear so walk with my grandchildren..
hope everyone has had a good day

nanny2507 Thu 31-Oct-19 09:17:37

hello all. I,m so poorly today i could cry. even my gums hurt. stayed at daughters sun/mon and she had a shocking cold. I am on such strong meds for arthritis is knocks me sideways. Hope everyone is good xxxx

Nonnie Thu 31-Oct-19 11:15:58

Oh nanny big hug, hope you get better soon.

joce progress, we have a lock on the front door, now have to check the new keys work. Still waiting to see what happens about the alarm. This would all make a great sitcom grin

On a positive note, I made a cake yesterday and it looks great. Now in freezer for when DS and GS pay a flying visit in a few weeks.

Last day of sun here, hope you all have the same.

SalsaQueen Thu 31-Oct-19 13:44:04

Nanny2507 Sorry you're not feeling well

Nonnie Glad you had a nice time with your grandchildren

Anniebach You're busy doing your family tree, then. I hope things are going well for you.

granmarie Welcome.

* everyone* I hope you're all doing alright today.

I saw the Urologist on Tuesday. He told me to drink only water, no other drinks, for 3 months, and I've got to go for an ultrasound on my bladder and kidneys, in a fortnight - I had all that done at the doctor's in July. Im also waiting for an appointment to go and have a Cytoscopy (camera in the bladder). Apart from that, things are the same.

Anniebach Thu 31-Oct-19 14:53:25

Hi all x

It is the 2nd anniversary of my darling daughters death tomorrow, I am struggling . Be back with you all soon,
Take care x

Joce345 Thu 31-Oct-19 15:13:36

Aww Annie bless you.. there is not a lot we can do for you our friend, but let you know we are hear for you Annie God bless you you are in my prayers as always have this big hug 🤗 and I hope with all my heart it in some small way it helps.

Joce345 Thu 31-Oct-19 15:19:20

Nanny hope you feel better soon.

Nonnie wow new lock hope your key works fingers crossed yes it would be a good sitcom haha
I made some Yorkshire Parkin for bonfire night at brothers..

boheminan Thu 31-Oct-19 15:53:48

Please can I come in? I'm really down at the moment - clinical depression's hit again, first time for a few years and there's nowhere/one to turn to

SalsaQueen Thu 31-Oct-19 15:59:09

Anniebach So sorry. We're all thinking of you.

boheminan Welcome, we're all familiar with depression/anxiety on here. I've had clinical (it used to be called Endogenous) depression for many years. Are you currently on antidepressants?

Nonnie Thu 31-Oct-19 16:10:26

Salsa think you might have the wrong person, I haven't seen mine recently.

Co coffee? That would be hard, I like water but need coffee.

* annie* it is hard, very hard, nothing I say will help.

bohemian all welcome here for support and to give support.

boheminan Thu 31-Oct-19 16:19:22

Thank you for your welcome. I don't feel I fit in anywhere at the moment. I hit rock bottom about a week ago but desperately want to get through it this time without pills. I've been on Amitriptyline and Zopiclone previously. The paranoia is setting in.

For years I took St. John's Wort and it was literally a life saver for me but I've stopped taking them as I've had to go on statins. I'm interested reading here that folk find Rescue Remedy can help - I hadn't thought of trying it.

grapefruitpip Thu 31-Oct-19 17:32:38

Hi there one and all, please boheminan, nobody gets any prizes for doing without medication. See your GP .

Doodle Thu 31-Oct-19 18:15:40

Welcome from me too bohemian. Yes we are all familiar with depression here. Perhaps it would be a good idea to do as grapefruitpip suggested and see your GP. They should be aware you are feeling so low and may be able to help.
nanny sorry you are not feeling well. Hope you feel better soon.