I am looking after my husband following a cancer diagnosis this time last year.
Very (very) thankfully he is well and “stable” at the moment and I am so relieved and grateful for this. However I am finding it very hard at times to always appear to be upbeat, positive and coping with a truly sad and frightening situation on my own.
I am sure family and friends think I am coping as a I never tell them now how I really feel. My husband looks well and is completely in denial about his/our situation- and I feel everyone else is too.
I am told by everyone, including medical people that I need to live one day at a time.......”keep making memories” “enjoy every day .......”until the time comes” ........
Our adult children/friends tell me not to worry, dad is (looks) so well - what am I worried about - we all have to die sometime..... and how I could be run over by a bus tomorrow..... just don’t worry about it.
I know people mean well and no doubt they are worried too and it is their was of helping me but it is a lonely and frightening place to be when you always have to be the strong capable stoic one - especially when I very often feel exhausted and all alone. I can’t tell anyone how frightened I am at times. When I have tried to tell people I am just told not to worry, so now I don’t feel can share my thoughts for fear of appearing weak and unable to cope.
Army horses loose on London streets
Last weekend, in Rutland, the first statue in Britain of the late Elizabeth II was unveiled.