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First St Barbara then St Gerald and now Father Jack

(60 Posts)
vampirequeen Tue 12-Dec-17 15:39:59

What is it with the menopause? I was told it would just mean I could have sex without babies and perhaps the odd hot flush. Didn't sound that bad

So why have I joined St Barbara (patron saint of bearded ladies) and St Gerald (patron saint of acne sufferers)? Now to crown it all I've developed hairy hand syndrome just like Father Jack. Time for me to move to St Clabberts.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=XV_CQrHKna8

farview Tue 12-Dec-17 18:22:05

grin

nanaK54 Tue 12-Dec-17 18:34:50

grin grin grin

merlotgran Tue 12-Dec-17 18:42:37

Does that also mean you suddenly jump out of your chair shouting, 'Feck, Arse or DRINK?' grin

Jalima1108 Tue 12-Dec-17 18:44:44

grin

the things I didn't know!
Now, I must go and pray to St Barbara.
St Gerald recommended Rozex

Hairy hand syndrome? I used to be quite fond of the blonde hairs on my arms but they have disappeared completely! and appeared on my chin.

Jalima1108 Tue 12-Dec-17 18:46:56

what about your feet - are they becoming Hobbit-like?

NfkDumpling Tue 12-Dec-17 18:58:41

www.bbc.co.uk/devon/discovering/legends/hairy_hands.shtml

Iam64 Tue 12-Dec-17 19:02:41

merlot! I almost spat my restorative sip of white out.

vampire, my view is the menopause is a bit like your first baby. You can read about it, talk with friends about it but nothing fully prepared you for the reality, especially not NCT classes or all those people who tell you to chew black ash or similar to cure your menopausal symptoms. Best of luck -
On reflection, it may be that merlot is spot on, I'm afraid my language and sense of calm/mindfulness went wotsits up due to the menopause and its aftermath

vampirequeen Tue 12-Dec-17 19:22:03

OMG am I to suddenly become ghostly hairy hands.

Unlike Father Jack I have a tip your granny out chair which resets at a sedate pace but other than the speed I must admit that whenever I see Donald Trump on the TV I'm inclined to shout 'Feck! Arse!' and you never know he may drive me to drink.

Iam64 Tue 12-Dec-17 21:39:22

I fear Trump has a lot to answer for ?

Jalima1108 Tue 12-Dec-17 23:45:25

grin
that's very mild vq!

phoenix Tue 12-Dec-17 23:49:06

It's all so bloody wrong and unfair!

(BTW, that applies to both the menopause and Trump, but I suppose at least one of them is a natural progression in life)

merlotgran Tue 12-Dec-17 23:56:38

Never mind, phoenix. It's comforting to know that every time Trump appears on telly at least one, if not all of us will be shouting, 'Feck, Arse,'

The new Gransnet battle cry. grin

Jalima1108 Tue 12-Dec-17 23:59:55

Let's hope Trump doesn't last as long as the menopause .....

NfkDumpling Wed 13-Dec-17 07:50:47

I'm sticking to the HRT. Wonderful stuff. That and gin. Sorted the menopause, but I fear we're feaking stuck with Trump.

Iam64 Wed 13-Dec-17 08:09:37

NfkD I suspect many of us would either have taken or stuck with HRT if the reality of post menopausal stuff had been spelled out. Given a choice between the positives and the possible risks, I know which way I;d have jumped.

NfkDumpling Wed 13-Dec-17 19:54:52

I was lucky. I had a hysterectomy just before the menopause really struck so got the option of taking the minimum dose of oestrogen only HRT. There is a slightly higher risk of breast cancer but there are benefits, apparently helping prevent osteoporosis, dementia and memory loss. When I had to come off it for a month before my knee op my skin got worse, I was more ratty - apparently - and .... I got hairier!

Willow500 Thu 14-Dec-17 07:49:27

My menopause came and went without incident but I have joined the hairy face band - in particular the moustache brigade. I'm wondering if I should encourage handlebars with wax as a new fashion trend grin

lizzy67 Thu 14-Dec-17 09:55:21

I so feel for you all. I too had a hysterectomy at 39 when I was 'peri-menopausal'. No problem there. But my God, did I become hairy! My lip, my chin, I even have to shave my neck, my cheeks are now becoming hairy, my toes are hairy, my legs are hairy. There is just too much too deal with. It's probably high time I went and had some threading on my face!

lesley4357 Thu 14-Dec-17 09:59:48

My toes look like a hairy troll's

carol58 Thu 14-Dec-17 10:22:09

And I thought it was just me lol! Off to Argos to get me an epilator.....

sluttygran Thu 14-Dec-17 10:33:25

Oh dear! At least you hairy ladies can rely on epilators, creams, etc.
My menopausal symptoms seem to consist only of mild hot flushes and almost complete hair loss. No hair on face, arms, legs, armpits, other bits, and worse of all not much left on head.
I still have eyebrows and lashes, so I suppose I must be thankful for small mercies.
Ah well, I shall nip out and purchase a luxuriant wig - and if its anything like Donald Trump's ghastly 'syrup', you will hear me shouting "FECK and ARSE "

inishowen Thu 14-Dec-17 10:38:23

Sluttygran, I can relate. No hair on arms or legs any more, and scalp becoming more and more obvious. I've just come back from a week in the sun and I hated having to wear a hat all the time. I wish I had the confidence to wear a wig.

grannyinmypocket Thu 14-Dec-17 10:40:57

It's not fair, used to have thin body and thick hair, now have thick body and thin hair,

newnanny Thu 14-Dec-17 10:54:11

I can only describe menopause as running along through life and then running into brick wall. Despite taking numerous supplements I feel tired and fall asleep I'm chair a lot to amusement of grown up sons still living at home.