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Just turned 50 and feeling morbid

(141 Posts)
Annabelle01 Mon 16-Sep-19 10:04:32

I turned 50 in July and it suddenly hit me full on that I may only have 20 years left. I can't seem to get this morbid thought out of my head and move on to make the most of every day. Has anyone else experienced this?

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sep-19 10:09:24

Not at 50!!!!

Are you menopausal?

MawB Mon 16-Sep-19 10:11:01

Well I would have been 6 feet under for the last 18 months by now if that had been the case when I turned 50, if you see what I mean! gringrin
Who says you have “only” 20 years ahead of you?
You may well be depressed and if so I would urge you to seek help. Are you menopausal perhaps, or suffering from empty nest syndrome?
Do get help, as for age - it is only a number!

tanith Mon 16-Sep-19 10:11:08

I’m 71 and thinking exactly what you’re thinking that with luck I’ll have 20 more years. I think most of us think of what the future will bring at each birthday but as we can’t hold back the passing years you have to grasp each one and live it.

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sep-19 10:12:29

Average age of death in the uk for women is 82.9. So you've, hopefully, got a bit more than 20 years left. Enjoy. sunshine

Gonegirl Mon 16-Sep-19 10:13:08

(that to Annabelle)

Bridgeit Mon 16-Sep-19 10:21:21

Many do not make it to 50. Enjoy living whilst you are living.or else you will become like the living dead.

Bridgeit Mon 16-Sep-19 10:24:31

I will just add best wishes to that. No one knows when they will go so live each day as if it is in case it is ?

Bridgeit Mon 16-Sep-19 10:25:48

If you become depressed see a Dr or a therapist . X

Witzend Mon 16-Sep-19 10:28:48

Crumbs, not at 50! Give it another 20 years!

Is there something you've always wanted to do or try, to give you a new interest and perhaps a sense of achievement?
I know more than one person who started playing the piano as complete beginners in later life or after retirement, and have thoroughly enjoyed it.

I turned 70 not long ago and did feel that milestone somewhat, but do try not to dwell on it. (And preferably look in the mirror without my glasses on so I don't see every wrinkle, though this does carry the danger of not seeing the odd chin hair, so can't stick to it all the time.)

It was in my 50s that I finally found success with something I'd been working hard at for quite a while, and did an OU degree too.
Just as well I did both then - later years were very much taken up with elderly parents/in laws, and now grandchildren. I just wish my energy levels were as good as when I was 50.

EllanVannin Mon 16-Sep-19 10:31:17

Blimey, no, not at 50. I never gave a thought about how long I had left. I was running around like a two year old, at work.

Even now I intend, ideally, to reach at least mid to late 80's to see my twin GGC see 20 ! I'll will myself. It would be marvellous and this is my outlook as each year passes to watch all the GGC growing.
I saw my GC growing into their now 30's, so there's life in " this old dog yet ". D's heading towards their 60's and step-daughter 70 next month.
Step GD 50 next month, so how lucky and fortunate am I ??

KatyK Mon 16-Sep-19 10:31:30

I hated it when I got to 50. Now that I'm 70, I wish I was 50!

BlueBelle Mon 16-Sep-19 10:33:24

Blimey if you’ve only got 20 years left I ve already gone I ve got kids older than you
I never thought that at 50 I got the best career I ever had at 53 and worked hard in it for 16 years
I m 74 and think that way now ( hoping I ve got another 15 useful years)
Goodness me your a baby get out there and strut your stuff

ginny Mon 16-Sep-19 10:35:03

None of us know how long we will be here. Be grateful for each day you have and always find something in each day that has made you smile. Live fore now or you’ll miss so much.

Harris27 Mon 16-Sep-19 10:36:25

Reading this has made me smile I turn 60 in January and was wondering how I’d feel!

janeainsworth Mon 16-Sep-19 10:39:35

Good grief! I’ll be 70 in 10 days time and hope for at least another 20 years! Lots of things to see & do yet!

Cheer up, OP!
m.youtube.com/watch?v=jHPOzQzk9Qo

trisher Mon 16-Sep-19 10:40:32

I'm 73 and hope I've got a bit longer. A couple of people I know died very suddenly much younger than me so I just think you don't know. My mum made 94. I'd say stop counting. If you are counting because you're not happy just now, change and do something new. It isn't too late

Whitewavemark2 Mon 16-Sep-19 10:45:09

Blimey wait to you are my age 73 (snap trisher)

My mum is 101, a bit too long tbh.

But live for the day I say. None of us know how or when we will shuffle off.

eazybee Mon 16-Sep-19 10:52:09

Sorry you are feeling miserable; birthdays with zeros in them are simply milestones.
I felt grim as I approached forty, thinking it was the end of youth(!); by the time fifty came I really didn't care, had a wonderful genuine surprise party, same for sixty, and am now embracing my seventies with gusto.
Once you finally are fifty, I doubt if you will feel morbid, but set out to make everyone say, I can't believe you are whatever age you are. Enjoy the beginning of the rest of your life.

eazybee Mon 16-Sep-19 10:53:29

Sorry, just realised you are fifty already.
Well the worst is out of the way.

Callistemon Mon 16-Sep-19 10:54:03

At 50 I had a teenager to worry about.

bluebirdwsm Mon 16-Sep-19 10:55:10

I'm 70. I make plans for the next 20 years. I feel 50 most of the time!

I feel fit, my main problem is with poor sleep but I deal with it. I have no illnesses, a good diet and walk a lot.

I don't see any reason why I should die soon. If I do [accident, sudden illness, rapid deterioration] then so be it. I've had my 3 score years and ten and am lucky to have done so.

I'd say be more positive and philosophical, and get on with life being grateful for your health/family/home etc.

Callistemon Mon 16-Sep-19 10:55:53

Ps she had only just become a teenager!
Still worrying about her 24 or so years later grin

annodomini Mon 16-Sep-19 11:04:11

When you reach 70, you will look back on this period and say, 'What was I thinking?' 50s and 60s can be wonderful decades - in my case I had got over my divorce, become a granny, taken an OU course, held down my job and been heavily involved in local politics. I also discovered that I didn't need an OH to go on Ramblers' Holidays. With growing GC, a whole new horizon opens up. I'm hoping that in my 80s - 14 months to go - I might have the joy of GGC! No time to be morbid.

Septimia Mon 16-Sep-19 11:07:24

I reckon that the best years of your life are ahead of you!

I'm much more content and relaxed than I was when I was younger.

Time passing and health issues are, of course, a worry and can limit your activities. On the whole, though, I'd say plan some enjoyable things to do and look forward to them. Fit in as much as you can while you still can - and then you'll have lots of memories for when you can't do as much.

When my mum died, suddenly and unexpectedly, she was looking forward to a concert, had just bought new trainers for aerobics and was in the middle of laying a new floor in her bathroom! The moral is: live life right up to the last moment, don't sit and wait for something awful to happen.